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AIBU?

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To say my choice of holiday destination is not cause of his car crash

202 replies

Flowerpower333 · 28/06/2023 20:49

I made the mistake of not getting dd’s passport sorted for a holiday and so we couldn’t go. We went somewhere in this country and my partner crashed his car. He says i should pay half the damage as it was my fault we were there for not checking the passport. My argument is where ever he was, it is nobody else’s responsibility but his how he drives and he has equal responsibility to me to check whether a passport is in date or not. He says because I booked the holiday and I wanted to go that it was my responsibility to check the passport.

OP posts:
Comety · 28/06/2023 22:22

Appleblossompetal · 28/06/2023 22:20

His car, his problem.

His car that they were all on holiday in....?

I'd see it as a family expense.

PrueRamsay · 28/06/2023 22:29

Well it’s a family expense that they took out insurance for.

So that’s how it should be covered.

FiddleLeaf · 28/06/2023 22:29

MrsTerryPratchett · 28/06/2023 20:56

Blame is very powerful.

Yassss I always think about this in these situations

Flowerpower333 · 28/06/2023 22:31

😁

OP posts:
Flowerpower333 · 28/06/2023 22:32

We didnt cover him driving.

OP posts:
FiddleLeaf · 28/06/2023 22:32

You’re not a ‘we’ anymore. His accident, his car, his problem.

Flowerpower333 · 28/06/2023 22:32

No, I rook out my own insurance, thats not how we live. His car, his insurance. My car, my insuranec

OP posts:
FlamingoQueen · 28/06/2023 22:34

Were you repeatedly hitting him over the head with the passport and that made him crash? If not, then it’s not your fault.
(obv don’t condone violence!)

Flowerpower333 · 28/06/2023 22:35

We didn’t. I imsursd the foreign holiday. We have separate car insurance

OP posts:
Flowerpower333 · 28/06/2023 22:36

😂😂😂

OP posts:
Codlingmoths · 28/06/2023 22:37

He is doing you a favour by splitting up! I hope you realise being separated means he organises his own holidays with his dd. I wouldn’t renew her passport now unless I had a holiday planned, that way he will have to if he plans something 😁😁

and obviously you say that’s nice dear. It will be nice to be separated properly and you can stop blaming me for all of your failings. No, I won’t be transferring any money, I need it for our daughter.

Flowerpower333 · 28/06/2023 22:37

Well, we were together when he crashed his car but ipI was’t driving!

OP posts:
FiddleLeaf · 28/06/2023 22:38

Flowerpower333 · 28/06/2023 22:37

Well, we were together when he crashed his car but ipI was’t driving!

And now you’re not. Thank heavens. He’s clearly responsible for his driving.

porridgeisbae · 28/06/2023 22:39

Nope don't pay him anything for his car issues @Flowerpower333 , especially as he's dumping you anyway x

Flowerpower333 · 28/06/2023 22:43

Love that thanks

OP posts:
Flowerpower333 · 28/06/2023 22:44

If your partner crashed their car on a day out. Would yiu oay half?

OP posts:
Unexpectedlysinglemum · 28/06/2023 22:44

The money for this seems like the least of your issues with him sadly.. x

TheGoogleMum · 28/06/2023 22:45

Person who booked holiday should have checked passports ideally... but he's the one controlling the car! Blaming you for it is a reach

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 28/06/2023 22:48

MrsTerryPratchett · 28/06/2023 20:56

Blame is very powerful.

This is brilliant

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 28/06/2023 22:49

You have so much relief happiness and peace ahead of you when he moves out!!! Help him pack! X

Awaanbileyirheid · 28/06/2023 22:50

I'd send a laughing emoji to any messages and then just tell him you'll pay it out of your divorce settlement. Then never pay it.
Enjoy being free of this......manchild

LaBefana · 28/06/2023 22:51

Avondale89 · 28/06/2023 21:49

Fuck me. Just how low is the bar for men and their parenting these days?

Pretty damn low, on this showing.

nimski · 28/06/2023 22:51

It was both of your responsibility to check your child's passport. Its entirely his fault he's a crap driver (and husband...)

LaBefana · 28/06/2023 22:54

Lolaandbehold · 28/06/2023 22:17

This is the type of shit my husband comes out with too. It's misdirected anger, they feel better because not blaming you would force him to look inward and accept the blame himself. And why do that when he can make himself feel better by blaming you. I certainly wouldn't be paying half. I usually just roll my eyes at my husband. Suggest you do the same!

My dad used to break things, in front of me, and then tell me off for being careless! But in an odd, robotic way. It felt so weird. I felt sorry for him (stupid, I know!), and reluctant to say what really happened, in the same way that one does not want to waken a sleepwalker.

SwordToFlamethrower · 28/06/2023 22:57

Well, well, well. Isn't it great when the trash takes itself out.

Your DP is a manchild

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