To think that social standing affects the desire to associate with strangers?

[LazyJack]

I am in a very popular tourist and sailing destination. I’ve been sitting enjoying a glass of wine in the harbour and listening to a conversation unfolding on a bench on the quayside. The participants did not stop talking at eachother for around an hour and had never met prior to them sharing a bench overlooking the harbour. It led me to wondering whether your upbringing/‘class’ makes you more or less inclined to find common ground with strangers.

I am middle class, and am disinterested in any opinions on this - I can’t help my upbringing or my life. It is what it is. I will not enter into protracted conversation with strangers - I’ll exchange pleasantries and carry on with my day. I’m not interested in whether they thought their pudding in the pub down the road was overpriced or which day is bin day in Sutton Coldfield. Yet these strangers managed to prattle on for a full hour about completely inconsequential dross - they were incredibly loud so it was difficult to ignore, and they were quite close.

So; if you’re working class, do you try harder to find common ground with people? Do you try hard to be friendly? Why?

I think it’s probably more of a personality thing tbh. Middle class tend to be more stand off ish but that said some are super friendly

Is there anything in UK that is not a class thing?

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I'm not sure this could be termed a class based thing?! Not sure why you think that really.

I like talking to people personally. If I was sat next to someone randomly for whatever reason, I would exchange pleasantries and pass the time of day for sure. You know within less than a minute whether the person you're talking to is up for protracted conversation or not.

So i would take the lead from the person I was talking to by going quiet if they were giving me those vibes. However, if they were up for a chat (and I was too) then I could talk to a stranger for a hour.

Would depend entirely on my own mood and on how the other person was responding. I would expect someone to read the room as to whether I was up for continuing the chat too.

I'm not British but live here, I would have thought that the middle class would have more social confidence, and more likely to chat? I'm an introvert but making small talk is part of my job, so I tend to make conversation.

In my experience it’s a people who live alone thing. If you are short on human interaction then you can be more up for a casual conversation. It’s not a class thing imho.

Are you Hyacinth Bucket OP?

Traditionally there has been a sort of working class 'camaderie' in the UK, a sort of uniting of us against them.

The sort of behaviour you report is also linked often to a lack confidence by individuals in themselves and their own judgements and opinions and a need to hear those being validated by others. This is often, but not always, linked to levels of education, which tends to have a high correlation with social class.

I’d never considered this before, but tbh you do have a point….

I’m as ‘middle class’ as they come and I completely disagree.

At my DC’s school there is a noticeable difference in who exchanges chat in the playground and who doesn’t and the ones who make the most effort to include everyone and speak to people are the more MC ones.

Ive always thought it was good manners to speak to people and people of all classes are capable of having good manners, or not, I don’t think this is a class issue.

Utterly insane notion sorry

I am working class (very) and would rather poke my eyes out than talk to strangers in the way you describe.

This isn't a class thing.
I'm working class, I actively avoid talking to people of all kinds and do not seek 'common ground'. Weird post.

I've heard it all now.
Class determining whether you enjoy some small talk?
I think it's how introverted or extroverted you are.
How snobbish can you be to even think this

You sound like a massive snob, to be honest, OP

I think it is more of a time thing. If I have time, I will happily chat to anyone. If I don't, I don't. I am middle class. My husband is working class and he would chat too.

my children are at a middle class school and the topics between strangers include: schools, how to fake church to get a good school and the sheer effort the fakery requires, NCG group gossip, the local “trail” which is either Easter or Christmas, the next school quiz night, and Prosecco.

I don’t think it is related to class, I think it is more likely to be linked up upbringing and the social norm in your community.

I am middle class in the community I grew up in having a conversation with anyone is the norm and seen as friendly, you will often find two strangers having a natter. The community I am in now it’s much less common people actively avoid conversations.

I'm v middle class and loathe pretty much everyone else out there. DP is v working class and can (and does) talk to anyone. But that's not because of our disparate upbringings, it's because i'm an antisocial recluse and DP is a chatty people person.

Well, I'm relentlessly middle class - retired Civil Servant, speak with an RP accent, Guardian reader, went to private school, but also a Labour Party member, and I'll natter quite happily with anyone.

I'm MC and find in many situations- social, school, at events, etc WC people have been the quietest. Though in many of my circles I meet a lot of socially awkward and anxious people, which effects how they associate with others

I was raised working class, and I can chat to anyone. I’d say it’s more personality as not all my family and friends are the same as me. It’s also an introvert / extrovert thing.

Wtf I’ve heard it all now

Are you sure you not mixing up introverted/extroverted with class. Some people are chatty, some aren't.