Husband and Chinese take away

[SeaSnakes1]

We all love a Chinese take away in our house - we have three teenagers. A couple of months ago my husband had to go gluten free. Chinese take away is limited in terms of gluten free options so he’s said he’d rather not bother- fair enough his choice.

He’s now said nobody else in the house can get one as it’s cruel. He adored the Cantonese chicken balls and chicken chow mien. I thought he was joking , but he’s not. He has seriously said that it’s totally unacceptable and unfair for anyone to get a Chinese take away.

AIBU?

I think it's part of the adjustment period. Going gluten free sucks when it's not your choice. It takes a while to navigate it. And maybe talk about it when you're not about to order a takeaway.

What? Ever? They can't EVER have a Chinese?

If you really wanted a tiramisu then sure. Go ahead and eat one.

I can understand where he's coming from, especially if you were to do it regularly in front of him. It must be really hard for him to deal with the diagnosis.

Maybe find a new Chinese or ask at your local what they can do for him. It's a shame to never do it, especially if it's good family time and he's generally a good husband.

2 of our 4 children have allergies..we would only have take away they can't take part in if they are out somewhere.

Is there an option to have Chinese at times your husband isn't around?

Also a Chinese near us does lots of gluten free options... Might be worth investigating

I'm sorry but he's being a complete twat.

I'm betting if it was you or one of kids who had to go gluten free he'd not go without a Chinese or anything else.

Did you ban the things you couldn't eat whilst pregnant?

Selfish bastard.

Perhaps your husband isn't aware that the entire fucking universe doesn't revolve around him, you know, like how an infant thinks.

I'd be telling him to jog on.

Get a Chinese. Tell him to do one

Misery really does love company

Have a look at ziangs on YouTube

they show how to make Chinese at home , they use potato starch and oddly birds custard for batter (gluten free) . Excellent recipes 10/10

I bloody love a Chinese!

If my DH had to go GF I'd expect him to order GF things / make a fakeaway / get himself a different takeaway whilst I got Chinese.

He can't dictate what you can eat at all - you obviously would be a bit mean to get his favourite food and eat it right in front of his face, but you can't just never have a Chinese again because of him.

If someone said that to me I'd be eating it for dinner every night for at least a week.

You took the exact words right out of my mouth.

Is he asking that you not order it as a family meal for which he would then need to eat something else while with you all or that you not eat it at all?

My youngest had a (non-life threatening) dairy allergy for the first 9 months of her life. As I breastfed it meant I went dairy free. When I cooked family meals, I made them dairy free (sometimes with the natural option for them to add cheese or such) and when we did take away or went out we always chose somewhere I could order from. I did not need to explicitly request this - it was assumed that way because we eat as a family. If this is his request, I think it entirely reasonable.

However if, for example, he were working late you said “Ok, let’s sort our separate meals then,” but proceeded to be upset because he didn’t want you having Chinese take away, I would say he is being unreasonable. Same if he has options at the Chinese restaurant but is refusing only because he can’t have what he wants.

He has to change his eating habits. It may be a difficult and miserable transition, but it is what it is. As a family you should accommodate this, but that doesn’t mean giving up the foods you enjoy entirely.

(I specify non-life threatening because my oldest had a life threatening allergy and it was a very different experience.)

This. ^ Every. Single. MAN. in the world would still go ahead and eat whatever he likes, and to hell if his woman can't eat it. Can you seriously see any man being lectured and dictated to by a WOMAN on what he can and cannot eat? LMFAO, yeah right! 😆

He's a selfish prick.

If I were him, I would research youtube/tiktok recipes on gluten-free altenatives. But then, I would like to think I am not a selfish bitch.

Get M&S Tempura chicken strips for him which are gf and give him those with sweet chilli sauce, bag of prawn crackers and and home made egg fried rice. Then buy an M&S Chinese meal box for the rest of you.

This is such a good point and definitely ask him did he give up the things you couldn’t have in pregnancy.

My DH would have been in tears if he were pregnant because all the foods you can’t/shouldn’t have in pregnancy he enjoys and eats often while the only thing I missed but wasn’t difficult to go without was watermelon and candy floss grapes.

I also struggle to believe that the Chinese takeaway doesn’t have anything that is GF.

Plus, since you all don’t get it often, it’s unfair of him to dictate you can’t have it because he can’t. Is it possible for you all to go out to the Chinese restaurant instead or he goes out for a bit while you all have it since it bothers him so.

Apologies as I see there have been updates since. I starting typing my response before there were any comments at all (little kids interrupted), so they were not showing up for me.

He’s being ridiculous.

let him sob while you eat it

I have found my people 😂

I’m not sure how he’ll respond if I do it anyway

That’s a concerning thing to write

Has he had a look at the menu?
Depending on the place, they may be able to provide the info for gluten free/containing foods.

This is a link to takeaway a few towns away from me which we used when a celiac friend of mine fancied a Chinese.

They were also happy to confirm over the phone that her order was definitely gluten free.

That menu might also give your husband ideas of what he may be able to have if he checks with the takeaway local to you.

I was surprised how many things didn't contain gluten, my friend definitely had a good meal and didn't feel like she was restricting herself.

www.tastechineseripon.co.uk

😂😂😂

Go out with the DC and eat it in the car. Problem solved.