DD lost money

[StarDolphins]

My 7 year old is alway messing in her money box, taking notes out & leaving them in various places for me to put back.

I’ve just gone in her bedroom, the lid is off & she can’t remember where the money is, she thinks she put it in the drawer but it’s not there. I can’t find it. I’ve told her I’m disappointed & cross & she knows I’m not happy at all & shes devastated at me being upset & cross. She doesn’t care about the money one bit, more that I forgive her.

Aibu to say she has to save her spends to put the money back now instead of spending it like she usually does?

Yes that’s what I wanted to do but everyone saying here not to do this.

Good you've learned a lesson

You need to find the cash or replace if. It's not her fault. She's 7, she doesn't realise the value of money.

Which is what you should have done after she first played with the money.

She's really not the one at fault here.

You've made your point. You've told her off. You've upset her. Yet, you want to carry this on until the weekend and punish her further? This is an awful way to treat your daughter.

😵‍💫

Ahh- there’s your problem. You don’t give a 7 year old £60.

Because a young child doesn’t even understand what that means.

She’s upset because she hardly ever gets told off - she said this was the reason.

What do you mean by letting her have so much money?

Bad luck! Take more care in future. Natural
consequences in action.

If in the long run you’re worried she’s not learning to save, maybe in future give her the fiver on Sunday night, and the challenge is to keep it safe all week so she can buy a plushie at the weekend?

I haven’t! It’s money she’s build up over the years from gifts.

This would be appropriate at about age 12.

Ridiculous and pretty vindictive towards a 7yo.

And she shouldn’t have access to it. Maybe a pound at the weekend to spend, otherwise no.

She's 7. A punishment that drags on for 12 weeks for something that was an accident and hurt no one but herself is ridiculous. Her Mom knows she fet he's it out, sounds like it's become a game and Mom's indulged it. Now it's lost its suddenly all DDs fault.

Mmm..

Sit down with her, as HER to work out how long it would take at £5 a week, to save up that £60.

Ask her to work out what she will go without to replace the missing money.

Then ask her if she now understands why you're upset that she has lost it.

Was it ever clear to her when she could spend it and what on?

Years and she's not allowed to spend it? Poor bugger.

Open a bank account for her.

You've left a young child, who you know plays with money, have unsupervised access to £60.

Now you're angry that you've let the money get lost. You can blame your 7yo but imo you have been foolish.

You have, by allowing her to have it in a savings tin that she regularly opens and has access to.

You're cross with the wrong person, she isn't to blame here. This could have all been avoided if you had opened a savings account for her and paid the money in when you recieved it.

If she's not allowed to spend this money at all then it's silly to have it lying around. The money box should be for her weekly pocket money, which she can save or spend as she wishes. The money from family which she's not allowed to spend should go straight into her bank account, keeping it lying around in cash is not sensible.

It's not great that she lost it, but the fault is with the decision to allow her to keep savings in a tin in her bedroom instead of in the bank. 7 year olds lose things, that's normal.

Don’t be so dramatic!

I don’t want to punish her, I want her to look after her money & put it back. I think/thought that instead of have the £5 to spend as she usually does, it should go back in the box (alongside me putting £5 in to get it up quickly).

Again, this would be appropriate for a 12yo. Ridiculous for a 7yo.

This is why my 10 yr old's money box is sealed and out of reach.

When you've worked out how to get her to give a shit, let me know because mine don't either 😭

She does spend some of the money from her money box. We usually go to on a shopping trip to Manchester at Easter & she is allowed to take money from it to go shopping.

When is she allowed to spend her money box money, or do you make her save it? If she has to save it, then it’s not really real money to her, as she never gets to use it. Hence she plays with it.

tThe £5 you give to her each week is real money, as she gets to spend it and buy herself a new toy.

If the money was lost in the house, it will turn up eventually.

Seven year olds can't count up to six, and don't know what they spend their money on?

Low standards!

I didn't say she should have to replace it, its just an exercise in getting her to think about it a bit more as clearly, she doesn't right now. The reason why might become apparent with the answer to my last question. If she has NEVER understood she can spend that money on something, when that will be, what that something IS, then that money is and always has been, meaningless to her and thats a failing on teh parents part (as is leaving her with that money to play with!)

Have you explained £60 equals 12 toys? That might help her understand the value. What did she want to spend the money on when she received it? I'd have put it in her bank account if she didn't have immediate plans for it. A moneybox is useful for change but depending on the type they're not as good for notes.

I think a 7 year old should and could be able to take care of her belongings yes.

Fk its 5 quid a week not 10... i cant count either!