To think this is insanely childish? Anyone else been shocked by an adult’s immaturity?!

[llammar]

In our group of friends one of us can’t make the birthday dinner for someone in the group. They birthday girls has taken huge offence and said the alternative date suggested ‘isn’t her actual birthday so it won’t feel the same.’ Wtf? She’s going to
be 38 not 6? It’s literally moving the day from a Friday (her birthday) to a Saturday. I’ve

Surely you plan whatever it is you want to do for your birthday and when you’re doing it to suit you, then you invite people and they either can or can’t come?

I think it’s a bit weird to suggest moving it and ask everyone else as well instead of just saying, sorry, can’t make it.

Personally I don’t think a birthday celebration always has to be on the actual birthday.

But I do think the birthday celebration should be on the day that suits the birthday person best. And it sounds like, in this case, it’s the actual birthday date that suits the birthday girl best.

That is presuming that you have alternative plans for your actual bday like a partner/close family/ other friends to celebrate with. Unless you are so unbothered by birthdays you wouldn’t mind not spending it with anyone.

Doesn't surprise me.

I've seen 50 year old women sulk because I've forgotten their birthday

Unbelievable

She wanted to do something nice on her birthday with her friends. I would see her getting upset about it as she maybe doesn’t want to be alone on her actual birthday. Some people prefer celebrating at weekends and other extending the celebrations but others like to celebrate on the real day. Since it’s her day I’d probably go with what she prefers. The friend who can’t make it will just have to miss out this time.

No I’m not getting back late! It’s already being planned months in advance (it’s in august).

It’s not being moved. The person flying back said they could do the Saturday, everyone else was fine with it, birthday girl was not!

I have posted because I was shocked that someone could be so much of a princess about their birthday! She is a lovely person but I honestly cannot believe someone could be this precious.

Yep if I wanted all my friends there I would move the date. Most years your birthday falls on a Monday or Wednesday and who wants to go out then.

Sure but then you just say 'Ah I'd really like it on my birthday because I'm not doing anything else!' and that's it. No need for anyone to get offended or assume the worst of their friends. I don't see in what world someone wanting to come to your celebration is a bad thing or worth getting the hump about. Surely it's nice that OP really wants to attend her birthday dinner?

I'm amazed about the person who is absent on a friend's birthday being such a princess about someone else's birthday.

Just don't go! What a princess.

But literally everyone is telling you she's not being unreasonable to expect to celebrate her birthday on the day of her choosing. It's not about celebrating on the actual birthday, it's about the fact the birthday girl gets to pick the date it's celebrated on.
You all sound like horrible friends ganging up on her like this and bitching about her behind her back for not wanting to be a doormat. I'd be annoyed if I'd planned something for months then someone wants to change it and the rest of the group expected me to just roll over too.

Who says she hasn’t said that? OP won’t tell us what the birthday girls alternative plans would have been.

I'd be happier to have it on the Saturday! Who wants to rush around after work for a night out when you can have it at a leisurely pace on a Saturday?

Plus... makes your birthday last longer!

She said 'They birthday girls has taken huge offence'?

Tbh the more you post, the more you're sounding like a terrible friend!! Do you even like this person?!

The majority of comments are saying she's not being unreasonable, sounds like you're having more of an issue over this than anyone else!

I like to celebrate my birthday on my birthday date. I am not spring chicken btw. Surely is up to the birthday person to decide.

Gosh!
Her 40th is going to be fun!!
The world obviously rotates round her.
This is just sad....

I don't think she sounds like a princess or precious. She would rather go out on her actual birthday, that's fair enough. If one person misses out, that's unfortunate timing. I don't think you're coming across particularly well though.

Calling your friend a princess for wanting to have her birthday when/ how she chooses would make me not want to be your friend to be honest.

Poor woman I bet they all be bitching about this.

I don't know, I see this time and time again on here where people are so quick to assume the worst of people who are apparently friends, who always assume their 'friends' are being unreasonable or are so quick to take offence. It must be exhausting. I assume the best of my friends and enjoy their company. If someone suggested another date so they could make it, I'd be flattered they wanted to come so much. I wouldn't be offended that they had dared to suggest another date.

OP's friend is not BU to want to celebrate on her birthday. She is being UR by being 'offended' by someone suggesting the day after when the whole group can make it.

In my friends' group, when it's someone's birthday, a date is suggested, it might be adjusted so the maximum number of people can make it, and that's it. No one is offended or annoyed. If birthday person said 'Actually I want it on that date' then that's fine.

I think you're the one making a mountain out of a molehill. I bet the friend missing out on the night out is as upset as you (if it's truly not you).

You can all have other nights out throughout the year so just let the birthday girl celebrate her day how snd when she wants. And be the friend you keep professing to be

Don’t think it has to be a drama but do think it’s weird you are all dictating her birthday plans too her and making a dramatic thread out of it tbf.

Then they can’t go. The person whose birthday it is chooses when it is.

I’m amazed one person would think the date would be changed just for them.

It seems the group have a favourite to hang out with and is not the birthday girl but the one landing at 19.00.

OK picture the possible scenario. 4 friends. Every year they go out on their birthdays for dinner, all 4 of them. One year one of them is away with work. They can’t make the actual birthday, but could come for dinner the following day.
you really think the best solution is to say “sod you then, we can’t wait 24 hours so we’ll have dinner just the 3 of us”?