To think most men are degenerate if you dig down

[dontshootthefruit]

That's it really. Could be pmt but...

I'm not sure MN helps change my mind, and yes, I know people don't post their happy stories.

My own experiences, that of most of my friends, the women on here. It's endless. I know there are some guys that are nicer than others. I know some that I consider good friends. I still wonder, deep deep down if they're all degenerate when it comes to sex.

Porn, prostitution, rough sex, casual assaults, etc. I listened to womens hour today discussing a new BBC doc about the widespread groping on the tube in Japan. What's most shocking to me is the fact they have sex clubs there that allow men to pay to replicate that kind of sexual assault (clubs decked out like train carriages full of prostitutes that appear to resist as part of the fun). Thing is, it's not a fringe activity, it's a "thing". I totally despair. I try to be positive, I have a partner, I have a daughter that's growing up fas, but push comes to shove... wouldn't trust one man that deeply when their sexuality calls.

Shoot me.😀

I think most if not all men recognise they are the physically stronger sex. What they do with that knowledge varies considerably.

In the workplace I think a key issue to tackle is the passive acceptance by decent men of shitty behaviour by some of their peers. They need to know that they are causing harm to women by doing this.

This is so true. We had an issue in our team with a couple of men being incredibly sexist towards two of the women on our team.

There were multiple team managers from our team on those calls over time and not one of them ever did anything to stop it (we are talking 18 months of 2-3 times a week calls).

It's taken replacing the male team head of with a woman for anything to be done about it. Those male managers would say they aren't sexist, but they did nothing to stop blatant sexism.

Talking about it is good, there is no filter that means no adult content can be accessed and that is naieve. Better than no attempts to curb it of course.

I've got a son and a daughter, what difference does that make.

I'm basing my opinion on evidence. And the world as it is.

I don't know lots of a certain type of man. I've encountered this across the board.

I mostly trust my partner, but not 100%

I genuinely don’t know any degenerate men or men who speak in a derogatory way about women or sexualise them - and I know a lot of men, and none of them would especially call themselves unusually good or nice. My social group is very large and very mixed sex with people from a range of backgrounds. So I wonder if the broader connection is that men who have a lot of female friends and therefore have experience of and like and enjoy the company and perspective of women without sex or attraction being involved, are more likely to respect women than men who don’t have any/many female friends and who can therefore only relate to women in terms of people they try have sex with?

(Equally, I find a lot of the women who seem to have very low expectations of and “oh, men, what are they like, it’s just how they’re wired they can’t help it!” attitudes towards men and toxic behaviour, are women who don’t have male friends.)

No, not at all. I would say I have met the same amount of degenerate women as men across my lifetime. Having worked for years in a female oriented profession, I live under no elusions that women are somehow better humans.

^ illusion

I can limit the internet by age rating, for example if I set it to anything lower than 13+ then they can't even access YouTube. I can also block specific websites, including all of the main porn sites. Then on individual devices such as laptops and tablets I can set restrictions on what it can access.

Men need to empty their nuts one way or another. Better to be single and watch porn every day with a box of kleenex than to have a bad, one sided or abusive relationship with another human.

Or are you saying that all porn is bad?

At a base level we are all animals with the capacity to be degenerate if push comes to shove.
Men, because they are bigger & stronger and have more weight/power in society than women, tend to go bad more easily than women do.
I think the urge to dominate & control is a little stronger in men (broadly speaking) but more importantly their capacity to dominate and control (because of being physically stronger, more robust and having more overt power in society) is significantly greater than that of women.
They do it because they want to and because they can.

I personally would say all points is bad, yeah.

Throughout the ages men have masturbated without it, its not a pre requisite!

Porn

The extreme inability for many to control their testerone has always been a real thing, it was just more hidden and underground. Now, exacerbated by easy access to view anyone's fantasy it has become a profitable business is my opinion? No, not all men are seedy but in my experience most who I thought were 'nice blokes' did have the same underlying last, so many lessons learnt!

I have two sons (19 & 15) and I have worked so hard on trying to make them realise how the things they might be exposed to may seem normal but aren't. I have had so many discussions about why women seem to be viewed as 'less' from birth and how easy it is for them to fall into the trap of thinking it's okay to run with the pack and shit talk women but how this escalates. I don't know how many times I have said 'That's misogyny' to them. I thought pointing it out might help. DS1 has got it. DS2 hasn't - I can see his view of women isn't one of equality but he's conflicted because he knows he's wrong. So what does he do with those feelings of conflict? Lashes out verbally at me. As a mother I do feel like I am fighting a losing battle. Even using their little sister as an emotional example hadn't worked. As far as I can tell there's an underlying rage in a lot of men that scares the shit out of me. I don't know why.

I totally agree with you op.

I genuinely don’t know any degenerate men or men who speak in a derogatory way about women or sexualise them

^

Really??

I think any generalisation is ridiculous, and will never achieve anything.

Some men are pickpockets, does it mean you assume that every single man is a potential pickpocket?

No, I don't believe that most men are degenerate 🙄, and I am grateful for that! The majority of men are decent, some selfish and unpleasant, others are good men. None of us is perfect, but "degenerate"? come on.

Well said.

I genuinely don’t know any degenerate men or men who speak in a derogatory way about women or sexualise them

Find a time and a place when you can listen to men when they think no women are around. It'll open your eyes.

I think you're right, sadly, most men even the ones who identify with being Good Men will not do much to stand up for women.

There are many things that men could do to show that they stand with women and to show other men that their behaviour is unacceptable. Sadly very few of them do. Something has to change-and it's men!

@KateJohns I think you're right, these 'good' men may not have raped, or groped or assaulted, stalked or harassed a woman but I bet, if we were to hear the WORST comment these good men had made in the company of men only, we'd all be shocked. Even knowing in advance we'd be shocked, I believe I'd be shocked! I don't want men to have the potential to be as awful as they are. I want them to be better than they are.

I would be more worried about raising girls believing they are born victims crushed by the "Patriarchy" in a world where they are inferior. This is so damaging.

It's a recipe for disaster. It's not just your boys you need to teach about equality, it's your girls too.

No. I do not believe that at all. My father was an amazing man who never strayed, who taught me that women should be respected and I never saw him raise his voice to my mother (her? thats another story uggh) My husband has been an amazing husband and father and respects my choices on MY life and supports me. My son in law is amazing to my daughter and their teens. My son worships the ground his wife walks on and is an amazing father. Our other son.. well. He is a lazy person and barely works.. He also at thirty has never had a girlfriend .. maybe a few dates here and there, but who would put up with a work avoidant , nighttime video gamer, that has horrible hygiene? Love him to bits and he really IS loveable but he is just Lazy and slovenly and I do not understand why. I do believe if he ever did fall in love, that he would be a loving, if lazy, husband.