Being ostracised by friends over kink at Pride

[TheEverlovingFork]

Ok first of all I am a) completely willing to be told I'm in the wrong and b) bisexual myself, but I am also a fairly conservative churchgoer and I'm aware my feelings might be really outdated.

Basically some friends and I were talking about Pride month and I said I didn't agree with explicit kink in the public parades, like the more extreme leather fetish gear and puppy-play and so on, because I think that no matter what your orientation is, being proud of your sexual identity doesn't equate to simulating/practising it in public. If i saw a straight couple in leather underpants grinding on each other in public I would wonder if they were unwell.

I completely understand the being able to kiss and hold hands and show romantic affection in public as that is an unthinking privilege heterosexual people have and it should be ok for all LBGT people. I've come in for a lot of homophobic abuse myself over the years for holding hands with a partner. I really get that aspect.

I just don't feel explicit bedroom antics are ok in the parades, and now I'm being told I'm a reactionary and not supportive of the community. I'm a member of the community myself, am I supposed to meld into the new acceptable groupthink as a bisexual? Didn't get the memo.

Anyway, maybe I am just uptight because of my religious beliefs. I don't know. If i had children I would not want them to see some of the the things I've seen in parades.

No. Unprotected sex is when the guy shoots inside another person without a condom. A creampie kink is when one or both parties gain substantial psychological and sexual enjoyment having, or fantasising about unprotected sex. When someone gains substantial sexual enjoyment from a woman being made pregnant, that's a breeding kink.

Then my apologies, Starman, I see that your post about 'looking gay' and 'It's just that many straight people - probably you, poster- feel more relaxed around me than butch women for example' was about femme or neutral presentation rather than socially acceptable 'comfort levels' around gay male vs butch female.

Reported own post but yeah it still sounded snide af 'pet' 😂 Probably 'normal' wasn't the right word for that PP to use and I understand why it's triggering for a lot of us, but at the same time, what's wrong with wanting to appear socially average? No one would guess I'm bisexual by looking at me either and I no longer wish to attend Pride due to its more extreme elements, but that doesn't mean I hate its history or myself or have internalised homophobia.

Just wish we didn't live in such ludicrous times where any hint of nuance or critical opinion makes you a demonic bigot against whatever the new acceptance model is.

I dont say normal to mean "straight acting".
I mean normal as in go to work, pay tax, go home, take the dog out, spend time with mrs, go to restaurants, hang out with friends, watch Netflix, do bloody laundry etc etc.
That's normality to me.
Couldn't pass as straight for a tenner!

Yes, I get this.

I'm with you. Sexual kinks celebrated in public feels weird to me and a bit off.

The use of the word normal was from my nephew, Luv. And who are you to decide that he is struggling with his sexuality? You know sweet FA about his life. Does he look like a "normal" straight boy ? No he doesn't as he is a 42 year old man that has been with his Husband since way before he could marry him. But i will let him know that according to some random he is struggling with being Gay, he will laugh but then get on with doing the dishes or cutting the grass ( as he has a normal boring life). Enjoy the pride march Pet

I agree OP. I'm lesbian, many feel this way. None of the people I used to love going to Pride with would go now.

Which means that all diverse voices of LGBT+ people have successfully been ejected and we're told what's left is all that LGBT+ is.

It's really not.

It's not. I think a lot of it is men pretending to be women who are lesbians, men pretending to be animals and men pretending to be babies. It's not same sex attracted people..... but it IS usually the same sex that's got these weird and very public fetishes. (And the public displays are also a sexual fetish in itself. They get off on making people nervous, uncomfortable or shocked at being forced to see it)

Absolutely right

It's not! There are lots of heterosexuals with fetishes, most keep these behind closed doors but you'll find the occasional one who is also an exhibitionist.
Most of my gay friends find the "takeover" of Pride by minorities offensive and want nothing more to do with it!

Why is this kind of behaviour more prevalent in same sex attracted people?

It's not more prevalent in same-sex attracted people. There are kink clubs and fetish groups all over the UK for straight people into leather and whips and BDSM and who knows what else. But those people don't have a parade in their town or city that offers them the cover to appear on the street and be applauded. TQ+, the fetishists, the adult babies and the furries have taken over Pride. It has absolutely nothing to do with the ordinary LGB person any more.

Hence 'LGBT+' in its political group sense and Pride being heavily full of straight people. 'Spicy straight' etc. It's become a way to be exhibitionist and involve non consenting others in your sex life without conscience because cool and anyone not enabling can be called a homophobe.

Any decent kink club throws out members who are found to be involving non consensual others in their fetish/kink, its not part of 'LGBT+' its plain rude and unacceptable behaviour.

I think the point about consent here is key.

The last Pride I went to - most of the Furries were straight women. There was also a stall for ‘Transhags’ which are basically straight women. There were relatively few gay or lesbian people - the first time that’s happened in my area.

Well I get it. Furries are absolutely nothing to do with same sex attraction.

What has happened is that Pride is now about any sexual taste and safety in numbers. I assume that will just grow and grow every year.

I hesitate to ask, but what’s a transhag??

Heterosexuality isn't normal, it's just commonplace.

There's nothing at all homophobic in a gay man wanting to just get on with life without making a fuss about his sexuality. I feel the same, will you now accuse me of internalised biphobia?

The scolding of homosexuals for homsexualling wrong from their own community now - a community with heavy involvement from political straights - is getting quite boggling.

But if you want to see the shaming, scolding, 'educating' and ostracising of LGBT people who won't get in line and chant Hail Mary like good children - who are not members of the One True Faith Party - here it is. On this thread and every other thread like it. This is exactly the red flags we're showing you.

LGBT+ has been turned into a political membership. It excludes LGBT people who are not politically compliant. Yet insists it is the one true voice of LGBT people. (Because all the ones who say no, it's different for me, this doesn't work for me, are Wrong at best, Evil at worst, and shouldn't be included or have a voice.)

A heterosexual woman who hangs about with Trans people to elevate her social status as an "ally"
Usually calling herself "CIS" and joining in with the various mantras against other groups.

The T equivalent of a faghag/fagbangle - heterosexual woman who surrounds herself with gay men. Usually just because they like to party without being hit on by straight men.

According to the information at their stall they are straight women who fancy transgender women or identify as one (though you do get transhags who fancy gay men too). There’s even a transhag movement accusing gay men of being ‘vaginaphobic’ and demanding they don’t ‘discriminate’. It’s crazy.

Bloody hell the world has gone mad, I’m glad I’m probably of an age when I don’t have to deal with this shit too much - an age where individuality can only be expressed by sitting in a box with other “individuals”

That is really shocking that some women are harassing gay men.. Hopefully a rare thing.

As for Transshag - The thought of a bloke in a frock and makeup- can this be for real?!

Can not only rather

I misunderstood- I read “ Trans hag “
as “ Trans Shag”

Not hears of it before .

Heard

Me too. I was imaging sex in the back of a white van lol

The T is not just men, it includes an awful lot of women.