Is my mate a pretentious twat or am I horribly jealous

[Thinkmymateisanob]

Very tongue in cheek but kind of not 👀

Me and my friend have been mates since childhood. Over 25 years, the rough with the smooth, through children/divorces/careers etc etc

Financially our lives are the complete opposite. It’s not an issue, she’s usually quite frugal but likes to spend money on experiences rather than things so if we go out to dinner and she chooses the restaurant she will pay. But next time I will pay and choose a restaurant I can afford. It works out well.

She goes on holiday 3 times a year with her family, abroad long haul and 3/4 short haul trips to Europe with various teens.

I haven’t been abroad for years. Not even France.

I live vicariously through her and she brings me lovely presents and sends nice pics.

Anyway - she’s just taken a teen abroad for a short holiday in Europe. All I’ve heard about is how awful her flights were as she had to fly economy as the planes got switched last minute. How awful it all was, how does anyone fly like this, she’s never flying economy again, she’s dreading the flight home.

I want to message her and say you’re being a twat, people have probably saved for months for those flights - pull your head out of your arse

She’s never usually like this. So I will forgive her but I’m just feeling unusually annoyed with her

She won’t read this because she hates social media and doesn’t use MN.

But just in case she does - I love you really M 👀

Tbh I think you sound a bit jealous and resentful rather than her being pretentious.

If you do a lot of travel you get used to being upgraded and can be a bit spoilt.

But tbh there really is no difference to speak of between business and economy on a European flight.

So she's just being a pretentious twat.

You could be talking about my DD, she is just like that. But she has a heart of gold, and does so much for her BF.
YANBU and neither is she

Well, flying economy is shit.

Presumably she paid for, and expected, to fly business class. Of course she’s not going to be happy that through no fault of her own this was changed. It’s not something she’s required to gratefully accept because others can’t afford the same.

People are allowed to complain. Or are you saying that being able to afford first class and business class means you are not allowed to have a moan about things? It’s like saying pretty people can’t complain having bad hair days or skinny people about feeling stick thin or not having curves. Get a grip. You are jealous. Now work on that.

YANBU, of course it's annoying when your plans are messed up but complaining about something like 'having to take a very short flight in economy' and giving off about how you don't understand how anyone tolerates it, to a friend you know is in a very different financial situation to you, shows a complete lack of social awareness. Fair enough if she'd got back and been like 'yeah there was a bit of trouble with the flights', but live narrating her trials and tribulations of flying pleb class is just a dickhead move.

If she has had to fly Ryan Air I don’t blame her , I’d rather not go .

People can complain but fgs know your audience. I complain about money issues to friends on similar incomes. No way would I whine about having to fly economy to someone who can only afford to fly economy.

Some people are so thick when it comes to social skills. She is one of them.

Tbh I'd be the same - flying economy would ruin my holiday, I'd be uncomfortable even in pain depending on the length of the flight, you don't get the same baggage allowance etc no lounges or all of the things I enjoy about starting off a holiday!

It's not pretentious - it's just not something she enjoys and isn't part of the holiday she's looking forward too. Just because some people might have saved for a while for those flights doesn't mean she needs to enjoy them - especially if she usually flys a different class, she's definitely not going to!

I don’t get why she can’t have a bad experience flying economy because you can’t afford to go abroad. She sounds like a good friend, so I think you are jealous! Who are all these random teens she takes away by the way? Sounds odd

When I was younger I went interailing slept on train floors. Never once complained.

I'm over 40 now and when I travel it has to be clean, comfortable, not noisy, not busy etc etc.

For me, through my lenses I'm sensing somebody of an age who likes her home comforts even when travelling. I don't think that's pretentious, just an age thing.

Oh there’s always one. ‘you’re just jealous…’ 🙄tedious.

YANBU op. Privilege always makes people arseholes sooner or later.

How is it tedious when it is literally her AIBU question?

YABU. Flying economy isn’t always ideal and it’s a big difference if that’s not how you usually fly. She’s entitled to complain if she’d paid and been changed!

I'd be more concerned how insensitive she is being. It's probably a fair complaint to someone else who flies all the time but not to you. She should read the room a bit.

Tbh first on short haul is just economy with the middle seat blanked out.

Tell her to stop morning and take the train next time, better for everyone, and send her this link
https://flightfree.co.uk/

*moaning

She was letting off steam, perhaps instead of complaining bitterly to the people she was with and making them even more discontented and disappointed .

She got it wrong with her audience that day, or maybe she just thought you would understand. You aren’t horrid, and nor is she.

just let it go.

If you want to complain your diamond shoes are too tight, do it to people who are equally as well off as you.

I don’t go on holiday much and I don’t like economy either. I’ve been bumped up to business a couple of times and that it was it for economy.

This.

Honestly business class for short haul European flights really isn't all that.

I usually fly economy - it is not the best. I can see where she is coming from. I could afford to upgrade I would. I don't think she being snobby,

Exactly @Thelnebriati!

I don't know why but 'not even France' made me laugh out loud.