Embarrassed I don’t have enough friends to have a hen do

[taratatata]

We’re eloping anyway so the wedding itself isn’t an issue. I’d love a hen do but I only have two ‘real’ friends, both live too far away and then I have a several more people that I vaguely know / have lost touch with, I would say we’re loosely friends but not close enough to invite to something like that especially where they won’t know anyone else but me. Minor thing in the grand scheme of things but I feel a bit deflated, hopefully you only marry once so it would be nice to have a special build up

I thought the whole idea of eloping was to get married in secret, not sure why you need a hen do, doesn’t that defeat the object?

I've been on some tiny hen dos including one with 3 people, you don't need loads of people at all!

I eloped and didn’t do a hen do. I very much got married for the piece of paper rather than the celebrations.

Could you organise for your two friends and you to meet in a city half way for a night? I don’t think having just two friends at a hen do is an issue.

I agree with this 💁🏽‍♀️

How people can find a partner but not a friend is a mystery to me

I thought you were hoping to further advise the OP? All the responses are still unpleasant and unhelpful from you.

But it's bollocks 🙄. Op does have friends, so you're agreeing with a piece of rude nonsense.

Pathetic response, grow up.

What about inviting your two friends to a spa and tea afterwards? Would that work? ( not looked at spa prices lately myself)

Jesus- how mean.

Some people are introverts, perhaps?

Also a partner is a friend, DP is my best friend.

I have friends but NO ONE was willing to do a hen except 1 bridesmaid so I didn't get one... still bitter to be honest as I have 3 kids and getting a girls night out is exceptionally rare so really was excited to do something (ANYthing) that wasn't parks and soft plays.

Lots of excuses from no money, no childcare (no matter what was suggested even if it was free or during school hours etc... to make it easy for them) to straight up 'I think hens are tacky so I'm not going' said at ANY mention of the word (only said by women who where married and had their own, although they deny it... 'I didn't have a hen, we just went out for a meal then had a girls night at home' etc...).

I think women are just miserable to be honest, men never seem to have issues with stag dos.

I'd say not having a hen do is one of the perks of eloping.

Why do you want one particularly? Is your fiancé having a stag do and you don't want to look unsociable? I mean if that's the case, he knows you're not bothered about keeping friends so he's not going to wonder why you're not having the party.

Do you have male friends? Would you have more people if you made it mixed?

I had 2 hens. And it was such a good time!!!

I wouldnt have changed it for the world. The best bit? We went home early to watch Friends and my hens bought me a new pair of pyjamas! 😂

What a night. I remember it with all the love in the world. Had the worst ever hangover though....

I am a massive introvert and my husband and decided to get married abroad with just immediate family.

I just have a handful of close friends who don't know each other particularly well and are spread across the country.
I'm no good in large groups (even of my own friends) so I had several 'hen parties'. I did a spa weekend with my mum and sister and then my friends were all enthusiastic to have special meet ups pre-wedding. Even though they weren't invited to the actual event. They know me and tbh several of them would have also hated a large group meet up. Getting multiple chances to get a bit dressed up and eat some good food was great!

Was going to say this - many people count their partner amongst their friends. The relationships where there is a strong friendship tend to be the ones that last too.

Always feels like the mean girls are the ones with masses of friends - God knows why.

Could you travel to the 2 distant friends and do something near them.
Or just do something nice with female family members.
I didn’t have a hen do and have no regrets been married over 20 yrs. They were all night outs in clubs with plastic willies when I was a bride which had zero appeal.

I don’t have an established group

I would feel a bit sick at the thought of an "established group".

My friends are all very dear to me, and are all completely separate from one another. They in turn have separate friends.

I always think that having one group of friends would be the sort of friend equivalent to never moving away from where you grew up, i.e. limiting and limited.

Spot the knob!

And how some people manage to have any friends at all is a mystery to me. 💁🏽‍♀️

Two good friends is great. A lot more than many people have. Don't be embarrassed. Ignore the smug, judgemental idiots on the thread.

Yes, it sounds like a very teenaged thing, really, needing to have your little tribe around you at all times.

We eloped.

To me a 'hen do' is only secondary in horror to that of a large, formal wedding.

I also find I have fewer really close, trusted friends as I get older.

Nothing at all to be embarrassed about, OP. Congratulations on your forthcoming marriage! 💐

She obviously feels bad she’s has no friends your gloating about having them and then passively aggressively criticising her for not is just crap of you basically and totally insensitive.

Get you. Jeez. What a clown.