Children's intelligence level

[unsuresue2]

I'm going to be totally honest here- at the risk of sounding very snobby but can't shake a feeling of real disappointment for my kids.
It's obvious to me that my kids are middle of the road in their class for maths and really struggling with literacy, understandable as both diagnosed with dyslexia- however their general IQ / CAT scores are also mid range (literacy really low against this) and my older child will start GCSE work soon and it's clear he will struggle to keep up.
I have been getting all help I can, fortunate position where I can afford tutors etc
But I find it really sad for them and a constant worry for me, that their educational attainment is an accurate predictor for their success in later life.
I have always been in the higher end IQ, loved school and got really good marks that allowed for uni education and professional qualifications- and I am fully aware of the privileged position that put me in- with good job and high earnings I enjoy today- I just don't see my kids being able to attain anywhere near that educational success, and I really worry for them that life will be a struggle.
They have loads of wonderful qualities- sporty (not premier league/ Olympics) kind and funny, great emotional intelligence etc.
I love them unconditionally, goes without saying, but I just want the very best for them and can't seem to shake this feeling that their intelligence markers are not predicting great futures.
Please help me with some perspective/ similar experiences

I understand why people do it but we shouldn't use the exception to define the norm. Most people are average, few will make it big anyway.

The reality is that lots of people aren't especially academically able. However they can still achieve a good level of financial security in life with good choices.

• trying to pursue an "academic" path - degree in less traditional subject at lower ranked uni because you don't have top grades: probably a poorer choice - debt & a degree no employer really values, plus unlikely to be suited to a graduate occupation.

• choosing a more vocational career that actually suits your skills and where soft skills or non academic traits can get you ahead: good choice. Eg tradespeople & creatives can earn very well, skilled workers in the engineering and design space do well, business owners of things like dog groomers, cafes, other services can make a decent living.

Support your kids to make choices that will enable them, even if that means they don't follow in your academic footsteps.

Please just be content with the fact that you have happy, healthy children. The moment their happiness or health gets taken away, you wish you hadn’t wasted time sweating the small stuff (speaking from experience here). Perspective is everything.

Richard Branson left with no qualifications and look how well he did.
Maybe they might have a career choice that isn't all about being smart in the way you're saying, but maybe hands on....I know alot of joiners, tradesman etc that make a fortune and probably more than you.

I'd definitely suggest they get a good set of "average" GCSEs including Maths and English as they're the "door openers". You don't have to be particularly academic to get a good set of GCSEs at middling grades. So many college courses, "on the job" training jobs/apprenticeships require "passes" in Maths and English GCSE, so that's a milestone to achieve if at all possible. Far better for children to spend their time/energies getting grades 4 or 5 in Maths, English and a few other subjects, than aim for a 7/8/9 in one or two subjects they like and not get the grades 4/5 in most others, especially Maths & English. That will give them options, both at aged 16, 18, etc., but also throughout later life if they want a career change, or retrain, etc, as lots of jobs have minimal requirements of Maths and English GCSE even for mature applicants.

As for the likes of Alan Sugar, Richard Branson, David Beckham, etc - yes they all succeeded, but they form a tiny minority of people. How many Richard Bransons are there? The chances of a random mum's son from Mumsnet becoming the next Richard Branson or similar are infinitessimally small! It's not right to "big up" children to think that there's a likelihood of that kind of success when it's more likely they'll win £100m on the Euro Lottery!

I think for most of us grades are irrelevant to earnings. I live in a nice house in a naice village and some of the happiest well off people i know are tradesmen. Likewise out of my 3 uncles the one with a masters from oxford pissed about most of his life and ended his career on a very average wage. The other two got average and no gcses and both set up their own businesses and do well, the one with no quals doing best!

I was over-hyped up as a kid as being so clever, but constantly screwed up education, left college with very average results, dont think im that clever actually, now doing pretty well regardless! I could easily sidestep from current role into pure sales and make 100k if i wanted.