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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Next door neighbour and they're business

212 replies

Psiaspops · 01/06/2023 14:36

My next door neighbour runs a business from his home. Usually evenings, 3 to 4 a week. Usually between 4pm and 9pm. We have the usual with his clients parking in front of our house and drive way, blocking us in etc and we usually just ask them to politely move or whatever
But last night, a woman was waiting on their child while they were in their lesson. She had two other children with her. They looked to be around 7 and 5. She decided she would let them play in our garden, pick flowers etc. I went out and she just spoke to me like it was normal. I asked could they please not pick our flowers and play in our garden. She was really taken aback but said okay. Then the youngest grabbed stones from the road and threw them onto our grass. I asked her could she please not let her child do that, and she said to me oh it's only some stones and then made a scene of how unreasonable I was being and how he was only a child etc. Now our neighbour has come over and said to leave his clients alone. I explained what happened and he said he already knew and they were doing no harm. Who's being unreasonable here as I just don't understand their logic, but then maybe I'm wrong, I don't know anymore

OP posts:
ButterCrackers · 07/06/2023 10:46

Send your neighbour the bill for damages caused by this client of his. Flowers replaced and stone damage. Tell him that you are filming your own area and that his clients will be reported to the police and charged for damages.

ButterCrackers · 07/06/2023 10:48

Psiaspops · 06/06/2023 16:03

Thank you, he's currently scraping up his dog shit from the back garden which only means one thing, he has lessons tonight, so my stress levels are through the roof already and they haven't even started yet.

Do report him to the council and also the tax authorities.

TeaDrinkerAnonymous · 07/06/2023 14:05

If he plays music at that time again do not hesitate to call the police as at that hour it is classed as nuisance noise, I did this with a previous neighbour and the police came out a few times to tell them to pack it in or face consequences. My complaints were followed up to the council (I complained to them every single time there was an incident of unreasonable nuisance noise and harrassment endured and the asshole neighbour's were eventually evicted. This took some time though, which I appreciate you may not have. I agree with another poster about mentioning your health position and why it is important that you need to be able to access your drive/ road for emergency reasons or how the impact on your current day-to-day health not being able to park close to your home would have. It makes me angry that people who behave like this are allowed to live so close to the rest of us just trying to live reasonably. He should be ashamed of himself.

Fraaahnces · 09/06/2023 12:29

I would definitely call the police. What a self-indulgent knob he is! You need to start affecting HIS life. Do people get fined for repeated noise complaints there @Psiaspops?

Datafan55 · 09/06/2023 19:19

What I found useful with dealing with a shit ndn was to always have a recording device in my hand as I was coming and going. One, this worked like a charm for her not approaching me, but two meant I was ready to record what she said if she did (I got her yelling at someone else in the end and this was great, not least as it was impartial evidence (ie neither knew they were being recorded)). Thus I would recommend having a phone, camera or some other device always in your hand when outside. I had a covert recording 'pen' that I used for mystery shopping. Make sure you test it first. That way if he starts hassling you because he thinks you reported him, you tape it and it becomes positive evidence. Legally I'm not sure what the rules are, but the police seemed to accept the recordings I sent them. The police class someone calling you names etc as an offence, eg intimidation.

If you don't have your device, or if you'd prefer it legally, report every word you can remember via 101. Each time if necessary.

Recording noise eg music etc doesn't always pick up, frustratingly. Even on official council recording equipment. Even if it's really loud to you! That's why you have to emphasise that you are worried/fearful etc.

If you speak to the other neighbour, take care to not say anything that is seen as harassment. Ie encouraging someone to complain, even if someone else is behaving shitly, could be seen as that. Make it sound as constructive as possible, eg ask them if they can park all over his drive as a solution (as sometimes you have to go out at short urgent notice and are blocked in). Imply to them that you are trying to find a solution and would like not to pursue it. Yeah, he might still call you uptight, but you can't fix stupid.

--
Shit neighbours - I have so had enough. Problems here for years, including a really bad history with ndn (she did yell in my face for 15mins the other week, but at least she isn't having people round at the moment). But currently surrounded by them on this estate (although with the capacity to get much worse, eg if the Ndn kicks off again, or in the continuing lottery that frequently changing council tenants in a block of flats/street are). All of them are only interested in pleasing themselves. And any of the 50% quiet decent people here who complain get called 'uptight' (at best), and badmouthed by them all (which is just horrible, as you've found). Fuck 'em.

Datafan55 · 09/06/2023 19:31

P.S Not meaning to hijack your thread with issues of my own. Just wanting to show I can fully understand how shit it is to hear people bad mouthing you and to feel a prisoner in your own home.

Friday today - again, we are behind you. If it's rubbish, just console yourself that you are getting good things on cctv/on your incident log.

BurntOutGirl · 20/06/2023 07:37

@Psiaspops how are you?

Psiaspops · 20/06/2023 08:03

Hey was just about to update you all. So it carried on as usual until a week ago where he had a full week of no lessons, so I thought happy days something has been done. Last night though he has lessons from 9pm onwards, which I think is him trying to be clever, as when I was asked by the council what his hours were I told them 4 -9pm. And off course they parked over our drive way as usual. I went out and asked the man was he planning on parking there and he said yes, what's it to you? I said well first off all you're blocking my driveway and second of all, you can't park even outside my house without my permission so you will have to move. He scowled at me, called me a bitch and moved the car. So I dread to think what tonight will bring.
But have it all on camera, and if he thinks he is being clever, two can play that game

OP posts:
RunningUpThatBuilding · 20/06/2023 08:35

His clients sound as equally delightful as he is!

Have you put signage up re: requiring permission to park outside your house as it’s a private road? If not I think you should.

Id also look into getting any offenders clamped rather than you having to confront them, It would probably only have to happen once then arsehole neighbour would warn them not to park there.

medicallycomplicated · 20/06/2023 08:45

What a delightful bunch of clients he has! What an arsehole.

Keep pushing on at him OP. He can't treat you like this. What an evil excuse of a man.

cakewench · 21/06/2023 19:47

Wow what a jerk, OP! Good for you for going to the council, hope it manages to get sorted

Coulditreallybe · 12/11/2023 01:43

Hope you’re doing ok @Psiaspops

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