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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Having to make space for a ‘sister’?

302 replies

Meggymoo777 · 28/05/2023 04:13

I have a half sister, same mother and we grew up together. Im mid 30s and she’s 6yrs younger.

I cut my ties with her 6 years ago, we were on holiday and she did some really unforgivable things, thought this holiday would really bring us together, I was so wrong, it just proved that she’s a really terrible person . I made sure she got home safe from that holiday and we never spoke again.

Her relationship with my Mum has been up and down, and completely nonexistent at times, but they are now rebuilding their relationship (nothing to do me or my Mum, in my opinion, my ‘sister’ just used people and she has now separated from her ‘partner’ who she’s had a child with she’s now using my Mum)
I am genuinely happy for my Mum, she’s happy she sees her daughter and now her grandchild, I offer advice on the latest drama that this girl has going on, I’m a great support to my Mum and she relies on me I think.
She asked me to meet this girl, I said absolutely not. I’m made to feel guilty because she also has a son, my ‘nephew’ apparently, that I’ve never met. I don’t feel guilty.

Now that they are rebuilding a relationship (which I want for my Mum!) I didn’t expect this pressure to be be directed at me as well. I support my Mum and her relationship with this girl, but I will not have her back in my life under any circumstances.

Think I’m just writing this to vent and get it down but would love some feedback | advice… am I wrong? Is family always so importantly as I’m told? I really don’t think it is?

OP posts:
Itsbritneybitch22 · 14/06/2024 17:45

Meggymoo777 · 28/05/2023 06:22

Thank you so much @Hillrunning you're 100% right. Thank you for calling this out. I've gone many years without having to reference her because she chose to be absent so maybe I'm struggling to refer to her. I'll definitely think about the language I use and how it's affecting my own well being

I used to refer to mine as my ex sister if that helps at all.

Maccys · 04/01/2025 17:50

Meggymoo777 · 28/05/2023 05:45

Apparently she does want to meet me, she wants our DC to know each other. I would freaking love a nephew! I'm a boy Mom and would love another boy to add to the tribe... but I don't want anything to do her. It's really sad for me, but I can't take the risk of letting this girl back in my life.

What's sad for me right now (and something I will never stand in the way of) is that Mum is spending more time with them, now that the step sister 'allows' it after all this time (because she's single, broke and looking for money), and I just feel gutted. I'll never raise this though, I know how important it is for Mum to have this relationship.

I'm stuck on the half sister bit because thankfully, she's just that, a half sister.

You sound like an horrendous person

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