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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Nursery no longer lets parents in..

183 replies

MaryWhy · 22/05/2023 14:41

I've just been to collect my DD from nursery early as she has a doctors appointment. When I arrive I'm told she's sleeping and I'll have to wait outside for a while whilst they wake her up, take her to the toilet and what not. She's 4 for reference and has long since dropped the naps at home but anyhow.

I was hoping to be able to use the loo quickly (i'm pregnant and was bursting!) so feel mildly annoyed by the new "rules" and lack of hospitality for parents.

No idea why the new rules exist, nursery employee was in a rush to close the door.

AIBU to find this odd?

OP posts:
Original poster
MaryWhy · 22/05/2023 14:42

Sorry forgot to include, they specifically said that parents aren't allowed to come into the building anymore. It's not an assumption I made.

OP posts:
MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 22/05/2023 14:43

Not in the building at all?

gogohmm · 22/05/2023 14:44

I suspect they have had an issue. Better to ban for all

Kanaloa · 22/05/2023 14:45

For me I wouldn’t keep my child in a nursery where I was not able to access the area the child was cared for every day. It just wouldn’t suit me.

Greensleeves · 22/05/2023 14:45

Move your child elsewhere. This isn't a good sign.

londonrach · 22/05/2023 14:46

Middle of covid my DD stopped all parents coming into building but it all open now. Very strange...has something happened in the nursery this morning that made them lock down

Original poster
MaryWhy · 22/05/2023 14:49

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 22/05/2023 14:43

Not in the building at all?

Yup, not in the building at all. Parents can't step over the threshold at all.

OP posts:
MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 22/05/2023 14:49

Kanaloa · 22/05/2023 14:45

For me I wouldn’t keep my child in a nursery where I was not able to access the area the child was cared for every day. It just wouldn’t suit me.

Nor me!

PinkButtercups · 22/05/2023 14:49

I find that really odd you can't go in.

DS is at a pre school attached to the school and they bring the children out but if we needed to go in there isn't an issue with going in.

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 22/05/2023 14:50

Perhaps email and ask for an explanation.

elliejjtiny · 22/05/2023 14:50

I worked in a nursery where that was the rule. It was because having parents coming and going from the room would upset the children, particularly if the parents/children dropping off got very upset.

Theradiatorxylophone · 22/05/2023 14:51

Ours tried this. We argued it and are low allowed as dd is still settling and has autism and I need to stay

Iwrotethissong · 22/05/2023 14:51

My DS is 3 and in a preschool attached to the school. We aren't allowed in. We had an initial look about but that's it. I don't see why I'd need to go in really.

Theradiatorxylophone · 22/05/2023 14:51

*now

RhosynBach · 22/05/2023 14:51

Ask for the reason. It might be an understandable one.

I would question the nap though. Do you want her napping when she’s long since dropped a daytime nap?

onthefence23 · 22/05/2023 14:52

That's really weird! We're not allowed in the room during nap time, if you want to collect during that window they just quietly spirit your child out and let the others sleep, otherwise we go in for pick up, they often show us what they've been doing and DD is always proud to show me a nice drawing or book... often not her own drawing much to staff amusement. I like seeing exactly what they're up to and you get a feel for the group energy when you're in there. I think this would make me a bit uncomfortable

ThomasinaLivesHere · 22/05/2023 14:52

It’s weird they haven’t explained. The nursery my son was at introduced a measure like this because of covid and it was only stopped about 6 months ago. It was after an inspection where they asked parents questions and I think that opened the nursery up again as parents were complaining about it.

redskylight · 22/05/2023 14:52

I think it's odd at pre-school age that they do let you go in. Different with babies/young toddlers.
Certainly the pre-schools round here all hand off to parents at the door.

ANewAdventure · 22/05/2023 14:52

I’d ask them why the change of policy. Could be there’s been an incident, parental bad behaviour, someone concerned about access to the children, etc.But they should be willing to have a conversation with you about it. Most settings are trying to get parents back in after everything closed during covid!

Newyeardietstartstomorrow · 22/05/2023 14:53

I can understand the rule, apart from safeguarding you are unsettling the other children and upsetting the nursery routine, particularly if the kids all have different start and pick up times. Using the loo wouldn't really work either, you can't use the dc's for obvious reasons, and the adult one is probably in the staff room where personal possessions are kept.

OhwhyOY · 22/05/2023 14:53

My DD's nursery will allow you into the entrance hall but you can't go into the nursery proper. This has been the case since COVID, prior to that you could drop the kids at their actual room. I asked if they planned to reinstate that system and they said no for the purposes of safeguarding and disease prevention. It does seem odd your nursery has suddenly done this - did you ask to use the loo and explain re pregnancy? I know the feeling but luckily there is a loo in the entrance hall for our nursery.

redskylight · 22/05/2023 14:53

Kanaloa · 22/05/2023 14:45

For me I wouldn’t keep my child in a nursery where I was not able to access the area the child was cared for every day. It just wouldn’t suit me.

But this child is 4 and (potentially) starting school in 3 months time. Most schools don't let you in ...

Sunnylassie · 22/05/2023 14:56

I think it’s totally understandable. You went to collect your little one early, not at the usual collection time. The could be a whole number of reasons, one being that your visit would disrupt the other children when no one else is leaving at that time.

Mutabiliss · 22/05/2023 14:57

Well this was normal during Covid, we weren't allowed in for a year and I know some nurseries near us have kept the rule as it suits them better (no room for parents milling around and children find the transition easier).

Is it because she's napping and they don't want to wake the others? Or have they changed the policy today? There must be a reason, just ask them.

Kanaloa · 22/05/2023 14:58

redskylight · 22/05/2023 14:53

But this child is 4 and (potentially) starting school in 3 months time. Most schools don't let you in ...

Show quote history

Schools don’t let you in? I’ve been in my kids’ primary school several times. I collected them from the door in reception class. I would certainly be allowed to look in their classroom if I asked to do so.

And anyway it’s completely irrelevant. OP chose a nursery that allowed parents to go inside. They have then decided to change it with no explanation. That wouldn’t suit me, because I would want a nursery that allowed parents inside.