Nursery no longer lets parents in..

[MaryWhy]

I've just been to collect my DD from nursery early as she has a doctors appointment. When I arrive I'm told she's sleeping and I'll have to wait outside for a while whilst they wake her up, take her to the toilet and what not. She's 4 for reference and has long since dropped the naps at home but anyhow.

I was hoping to be able to use the loo quickly (i'm pregnant and was bursting!) so feel mildly annoyed by the new "rules" and lack of hospitality for parents.

No idea why the new rules exist, nursery employee was in a rush to close the door.

AIBU to find this odd?

Presumably though you would ask why this rule had been put into place? If it was for the protection of the children, why would you not trust them?

After nurseries opened after lockdown many, if not all, local authorities early years teams had covid guidelines that had to be followed, including no parents allowed on site. My setting only just started letting parents back in this year.

I can see into my DD's nursery and see her playing outside in the grounds.

There is another nursery near my CM's where you can see the children playing outside and regularly out in the local area. That nursery is really popular compared to the one I live next to where you can't see the children at all during the day.

I take your point @AbreathofFrenchair about if there was a specific safeguarding risk, and of course if there was the nursery would not be in a position to share that.

I’m pretty Covid-conscious but it’s nearly three years since nurseries re-opened so I’m less than sympathetic to places (not just nurseries) that are excusing poor service with Covid.

We extended ours because the children settle better without parents hanging around extending the morning goodbye into 10-15 minutes long. Not feasible when you've 20 children coming through the door and 20 parents to get back out. Now they come into collect and dropped off at the door.

We dont let parents come in and gawp at the children through the windows either during the day. They only come in to collect.

Either way though the OP felt it more appropriate to post on here rather than actually asking the people that could give an answer.

It's not like she asked and them gave the reason here for us all to debate (covid/safeguarding etc) so all in all it's a pointless thread 😂

Parents don’t go into our nursery as a matter of course as they (and we!) found that door drop off worked better after covid. However we’re not fully banned and can step inside if there’s a need. Not sure how pleased they would be about parents asking to use the loo though…obviously you can’t use the one that the toddlers are in for safeguarding reasons so you’d have to go right up to the top floor to the staff one and would need to be accompanied so it’s a bit of a drain on their very tight time resources.

TBH I’d be utterly fuming at a nursery that had four year olds napping (unless ill of course!) That’s pre school age and they should absolutely not be encouraging reliance on napping at that age. Most four year olds would be up all night after an afternoon siesta!! At that age they should be learning through play and becoming school ready, not asleep!!

Meh. My kids were nursery/KS1 aged during the pandemic. We lost the entire experience of being in their nursery rooms and classrooms with them. I think you’re making a fuss about nothing.

The only point to make is the nursery should have notified you in writing to this policy change, did you miss an email?

Alarm bells would ring for me. It’s like they didn’t want to see what conditions your DD was kept in. I’d find a new nursery.

Nobody is suggesting unattended parents should wander in and out of the children’s play area. They’re saying they should be allowed to enter the building where they pay for their small child to be cared for.

It's like some of you don't understand that you and your kid aren't special.

Luckily, there are other places you can go to feel better about what you are entitled to do in a building filled with young children.

You need to ask why. This isn't a good sign.

During the pandemic, it was understandable but not now. There really is no need for it to be restricted unless something serious has happened. If it has, I'd want to know what that was. Otherwise they could be hiding things.

You would rather a serious incident was allowed to happen before any changes are made? How about preventing them happening where possible in the first place.

I'm honestly astounded how many people seem to think they should be able to just access a building full of children and gawp at them...

I'd be more concerned about a place that let parents in, potentially allowing unaccompanied adults access to a child

The best nursery in my town does not let parents in. They collect at the door. It's obvious why - no one wants people tramping through and getting their children at all different times of the day. Cue chaos. Health and safety too.
What do you suspect is happening?

Just to add, if they said there was a safeguarding risk to one or all of the kids which is the reason for the change, that's understandable. I'm sure they should have informed you of that though.

See I'm the opposite, I don't want other random people having access to where my child is so accept i can't access it either.

I agree with this in terms of parents not just being able to wander around, but most nurseries have a space parents can come in and see their child indoors, chat to a member of staff if needed and whatever else. To just flat out say no one in is their perogative I guess but understandable some are uncomfortable.

The thing is, op went in early to collect and not the usual collection time. There could be a whole host of reasons why they didn’t want her to enter dieting the day’s usual activities. Until it’s ascertained that there is a blanket rule of no parents at all times then it’s totally understandable. Yes, it may be a case of no parents at any time including end of day but in that case a conversation needs to happen to find out the general reason. Whilst the setting is open and it’s not the usual pick up time it’s perfectly understandable why you would have to wait outside. It also understandable why the member of staff wanted to shut the door quickly, they will have been needed elsewhere to supervise the rest of the children!

as far as the naps go, again a a conversation is needed.

Our nursery lets parents in during drop off and pick up - parents usually stay in cloakroom part rather than wander about. There's a hallway too though so on the day that more children leave at the same time they deliver children to the corridor instead of letting us in. When we picked child up early once he was taken to corridor that time to avoid disruption.
There toilets in the corridor which I have used once or twice and they let me use the toddler changing room when my baby did an explosive poo during pick up.

I think I would be very uncomfortable if I wasn't allowed over the threshold and had to stay outside. My son's playgroup had a similar set up and that was during Covid (when it was still a thing but slightly relaxed - we had to wear masks but still could go inside briefly)

There's ways to manage it without causing "chaos". Maybe it's easier for the staff if parents not there but we are trusting our child's care to these people.

I understand why parents like to go in but I don't think it's beneficial for the babies and children for parents to be going into the room where the children are every single drop off and pick up. It's bound to be time consuming and disruptive, there's an increased risk (albeit still small) of a child escaping or being taken, there's a hygiene issue with lots of extra outdoor shoes in areas where babies are crawling and playing on the floor.

Better to have handover at the door most of the time, with a chance to go in with your child less often.

A nursery that never lets you in would be a worry too though.

Would want to be able to drop in at any time to see what was happening. Nobody knows what goes on behind closed doors.

Our nursery only used to allow parents of the two youngest age brackets through to drop off. All others dropped off at the door and collected by the door. We were allowed to come into the hallway if we needed to fill out a form on the day but that was it. No issue with this whatsoever. I bet having parents walking back and forth through the joint all morning and evening was a pain in the arse.

I cannot believe some posters are suggesting looking for a different nursery!

Why? Why should they be allowed in the building? Really don’t get it. For a baby or very small child maybe but this child is 4 and in her last term before school?
The nursery isn’t a public toilet for parents to use?
Once you have seen the nursery once or twice at the beginning or when choosing it why do you need to go in and out? Seriously don’t get it and I’ve had 3 kids go through nursery’s / pre schools

Oh dear. What about school then? Going to expect to drop into the classroom any time because of closed doors?

So would I. Would make me feel they were blasé and disorganised about kids welfare and well being.

I went in my child's nursery once, to look around before he started. Another mum was allowed in because her child had difficulty settling, but eventually she was able to just drop off at the doors too. This was a nursery attached to a primary school and the same rules apply now my child is in school, I stand in the playground and the teachers let children out once they see the parents. I can't imagine how chaotic it would be if everyone tried to go in and find their child.

It is a bit harsh not to let a pregnant woman have a wee, but the policy of collecting at the door is pretty standard.