11 month old in restaurant

[Anoushkaka]

So I know things have changed with parenting since I had my own children, youngest is now 11 but do some parents literally just let their kids to what they want?

Went for a meal yesterday with DH and our children. A couple come in with their baby and get seated near us. Highchair is brought over and they put him in but don't strap him in because he doesnt like to be strapped in, mother said this to waitress. They order food and literally plonk a bowl of mash, veg and gravy on the highchair for baby to eat. He puts his hands straight in and starts feeding himself with his hands, food is going everywhere, patents are looking at him and saying "what a great boy he is".

Baby literally has food everywhere, parents make a half hearted attempt to clean baby which results in an almighty tantrum and him nearly falling out of the highchair because he wasn't strapped in. Dessert comes and the same thing with a bowl of ice cream, its everywhere. They then give him a sippy cup that spills all over him because obviously its not one for his age group.

He screams to get out of highchair, father takes him out and let's him bang cutlery on the table, pull soil from a nearby plant pot and again spill water everywhere. All the parents kept saying to staff was ,"oh sorry, he is just so independent and clever for his age".

I was appalled to be honest. I spoke to my friend who is a childminder and stressed that yes unfortunately a lot of parents are now like this.

[GonnaGetGoingReturns]

@GoodChat

Other adults are much more gross and disrespectful than a baby learning to feed themselves. I'd pick a weaning baby as a restaurant companion every time.

I’ve never seen another adult smearing and throwing food at other people not at their table and if I did encounter this then I’d speak to them and complain.

[peachespeachespeaches]

Depends where you were, and what time of day it was.

Lunch time in a Harvester? Suck it up. 8pm in a restaurant? You've got a point.

[Bec198]

They are clearly doing baby led weaning.

I have to say if this bothered me this much to the point that I spent this much of my meal out watching another family, I’d avoid the typical family-friendly restaurants where kids are more than welcome. I see more loud kids than impeccably behaved ones. But they’re babies/toddlers so I’m not surprised. Although the playing with the plant shouldn’t have been allowed.

[LolaSmiles]

Baby led weaning isn't a get out of jail free card to allow your child to make a huge mess in public. It's as annoying as when permissive parents say they're using 'gentle parenting' when they're not. Gentle parenting involves holding boundaries.

We did a mix of finger foods and spoon feeding with ours. If we were letting DC use their fingers, we ordered appropriate food for finger eating and we tidied up.

YANBU OP. Sadly your friend is right and a lot of parents have no consideration for others.

[Greeneyegirl]

I have a baby and I'm weaning them soon and this is why I'm not doing baby led weaning. Food every where, masses of waste and no idea how much is going into the baby. Yep, I'm a bad mother doing purees. So shoot me.

[Fandabedodgy]

A weaning baby makes a mess shocker!!!!

Unless this was a fine dining restaurant then you need to rethink your expectations.

[TeenLifeMum]

I have 11yo twins and they feed themselves - baby led weaning sort of but mostly because I was also dealing with a toddler at the same time. Didn’t give them gravy though.

Some people are bad parents and lots think the world revolves around them. I am not really a baby person anymore so I tend to block out these families.

[Chickenkeev]

@Fandabedodgy

A weaning baby makes a mess shocker!!!!

Unless this was a fine dining restaurant then you need to rethink your expectations.

Surely the point is more that the aprebts didn't clean it up though?

[Chickenkeev]

Aprebts? Parents ffs!

[Fandabedodgy]

@Greeneyegirl

I have a baby and I'm weaning them soon and this is why I'm not doing baby led weaning. Food every where, masses of waste and no idea how much is going into the baby. Yep, I'm a bad mother doing purees. So shoot me.

Spoon-fed babies make a mess too. Sometimes they even cry in public as well.

😁

[TeenLifeMum]

Oh and I didn’t leave the restaurant a mess ever - because I’m not a dick.

[TakeMeDancingNakedInTheRain]

Spoon feeding is outdated, baby led weaning and putting food directly on their feeding tray is the thing. At 11 months old they still don't actually eat much it's still just about tasting and learning. I think as you say you have an 11 year old you have forgotten how hard it is with small kids. We went out a few weeks ago for a meal for my husband's birthday, it was a nice pub that kind of fancies itself but still a family place. We intentionally booked a 4pm early tea as we knew the kids would flag. Out youngest is 2 and had hit the wall he was a nightmare. The people seated near us did nothing but tut and give us dirty looks, we have children but we also wanted to eat out, our 7 and 5 year old are obviously perfectly behaved but a 2 year old hasn't mastered sitting still and quietly.

I think you've repressed what having a baby is like, I mean unless you had a super human baby who bypassed the entire infant stage?

[Fandabedodgy]

Surely the point is more that the parents didn't clean it up though

Yes I agree they should have cleaned it up.

[Housewife2010]

@7Worfs

I have a baby and he is spoon-fed in restaurants to avoid mess. Regular gurgling is fine, but if he starts crying we take him outside for a bit or head home.

I’ll tell you what’s more annoying though - parents who have never explained to their 3+ yo that we speak quietly and don’t roam in restaurants.

100%

[MargotBamborough]

YANBU, OP.

I have a two year old and a 4 month old and we might risk going to a restaurant now because the two year old eats pretty nicely and the 4 month old is pretty chill, bur we basically didn't eat out with my son from when he started weaning until he was old enough to manage pretty well. Can't imagine anything worse than being in a restaurant during the gunge throwing stage.

People who think you're being unreasonable for not wanting your nice meal in a restaurant to have a feeding time at the zoo vibe are probably the same ones letting their kids do this.

[Tinybrother]

@Greeneyegirl

I have a baby and I'm weaning them soon and this is why I'm not doing baby led weaning. Food every where, masses of waste and no idea how much is going into the baby. Yep, I'm a bad mother doing purees. So shoot me.

No one thinks anyone is a bad mother for doing purées, what a silly comment

[Mummyoflittledragon]

@Haywirecity

Your child's not ready to go into a restaurant.

Exactly. Dd was a terrible food thrower. We took a plastic mat with us everywhere when we went out on holiday for a couple of meals. Apart from that, we only ever ate at home until the stage passed.

[Reugny]

They order food and literally plonk a bowl of mash, veg and gravy on the highchair for baby to eat.

I doubt this is a true experience as you don't feed an 11 month old gravy especially restaurant gravy.

This is because food with high salt levels can kill small children.

[DemonicCaveMaggot]

Babies are annoying but so are a lot of adults when it comes to restaurants.

[Anoushkaka]

@Reugny

They order food and literally plonk a bowl of mash, veg and gravy on the highchair for baby to eat.

I doubt this is a true experience as you don't feed an 11 month old gravy especially restaurant gravy.

This is because food with high salt levels can kill small children.

It was gravy. Asked for a baby bowl, veg, mash and gravy..

[TheyAreMyBhunasPete]

Classic judgemental brit hating on babies and children out in public.

[Chickenkeev]

@Anoushkaka

It was gravy. Asked for a baby bowl, veg, mash and gravy..

Gravy is the new heroin apparently 😂

[TheyAreMyBhunasPete]

@Reugny

They order food and literally plonk a bowl of mash, veg and gravy on the highchair for baby to eat.

I doubt this is a true experience as you don't feed an 11 month old gravy especially restaurant gravy.

This is because food with high salt levels can kill small children.

You've got to be kidding? A bit of gravy is not going to kill a small child? 😂

[Katiereinvented]

@Maddy70

Baby's should be spoon fed in a restaurant. It's unfair on the staff and nearby customers to get splattered in food

Agreed.

[Reugny]

@Greeneyegirl

I have a baby and I'm weaning them soon and this is why I'm not doing baby led weaning. Food every where, masses of waste and no idea how much is going into the baby. Yep, I'm a bad mother doing purees. So shoot me.

You are aware that food like carrots can easily be picked up and eaten by LOs without causing a mess?

My DD was fed a mixture of foods and in different ways when she was being weaned.