11 month old in restaurant

[Anoushkaka]

So I know things have changed with parenting since I had my own children, youngest is now 11 but do some parents literally just let their kids to what they want?

Went for a meal yesterday with DH and our children. A couple come in with their baby and get seated near us. Highchair is brought over and they put him in but don't strap him in because he doesnt like to be strapped in, mother said this to waitress. They order food and literally plonk a bowl of mash, veg and gravy on the highchair for baby to eat. He puts his hands straight in and starts feeding himself with his hands, food is going everywhere, patents are looking at him and saying "what a great boy he is".

Baby literally has food everywhere, parents make a half hearted attempt to clean baby which results in an almighty tantrum and him nearly falling out of the highchair because he wasn't strapped in. Dessert comes and the same thing with a bowl of ice cream, its everywhere. They then give him a sippy cup that spills all over him because obviously its not one for his age group.

He screams to get out of highchair, father takes him out and let's him bang cutlery on the table, pull soil from a nearby plant pot and again spill water everywhere. All the parents kept saying to staff was ,"oh sorry, he is just so independent and clever for his age".

I was appalled to be honest. I spoke to my friend who is a childminder and stressed that yes unfortunately a lot of parents are now like this.

[Deadringer]

Selfish and entitled. There is nothing wrong with baby led weaning but do it at home. They could wait till he is a bit older to eat out or feed him at home and just give him non messy finger food to eat/play with while they have their own meal.

[JenniferBooth]

The fact that they let the kid shoot soil from the pot plant everywhere and SOME of the reactions here show a disgusting lack of respect for hospitality staff

[Vintagejazzing]

YANBU. But obviously some posters on here think it's ok to leave a total mess for the staff to clean up and allow your child's tantrums and banging cutlery repeatedly off the table to disturb other customers.

[Q2C4]

@Maddy70

Baby's should be spoon fed in a restaurant. It's unfair on the staff and nearby customers to get splattered in food

And if your child won't eat from a spoon, then what?

[Wilkolampshade]

No, would have pissed me off too.
Not the style of weaning so much, but the lack of any attempt to limit mess and the wrecking of plant etc.

[Vintagejazzing]

@Q2C4

And if your child won't eat from a spoon, then what?

Maybe don't bring him to restaurants. It's not fair on staff or nearby customers to have food spread all over the place.

[MuffinToSeeHere]

@Q2C4

And if your child won't eat from a spoon, then what?

Obviously you're only allowed to go to somewhere like McDonald's where spoons are not required and then people like the OP can judge you for that too.

[cherryolive]

Its not that deep really is it. Babies/kids make mess. Would sooner see parents engage with their child and maybe make a bit of a mess than shove a tablet under his nose and ignore him.. I do always thoroughly clean up after my kids in a restaurant though.

[Haywirecity]

@Q2C4

And if your child won't eat from a spoon, then what?

Your child's not ready to go into a restaurant.

[ilovesooty]

@Vintagejazzing

Maybe don't bring him to restaurants. It's not fair on staff or nearby customers to have food spread all over the place.

Or don't order something really messy like mash and gravy.

[goinginsaneinthemembrane]

Don't they know they should stay at home and never take a baby anywhere?!

[Q2C4]

@Haywirecity my DC is certainly ready for a restaurant - she will sit quite happily and quietly and eat a meal at the table. She just doesn't use a spoon.

[VivaVivaa]

I don’t think it’s unreasonable to let a baby feed themselves in a restaurant as long as the parents check with the staff first and clean up any mess afterwards. Pulling soil out of plants, banging cutlery and walking around spilling water isn’t on though. Situational screaming (eg when being wiped) for a short period of time I’d put up with…but I’d have taken DS outside if he was screaming without stopping or for no clear reason at that age.

[Anoushkaka]

It's not the fact the baby made a mess it's the fact that the parents didn't care. Practically encouraged him to do it and half heartedly tried to clean. Waitress had to come over with a dust pan and brush to clean up the soil while parents sat there watching. Never once apologised to waiting staff for the mess. It was their whole attitude that stinked of entitlement.

[angelikacpickles]

@comfyshoes2022

I’m not bothered by a baby eating with his hands and creating somewhat of a mess at a restaurant, provided that the parents thoroughly clean up the table and (if needed) high chair and floor at the end of the meal. Eating with hands while the meal is ongoing seems harmless, and I don’t see why it would affect someone at another table.

The plant and screaming are bad.

This exactly.

I have no idea why you care how messy someone else's baby gets while eating.

Banging cutlery is different, as obviously that is annoying.

[Q2C4]

@Vintagejazzing my DD doesn't spread food everywhere. She just doesn't use a spoon. Many BLW-fed children don't. It can be better for the child if they get to experience the textures of actual food by eating with their hands rather than have everything mushy and be fed from a spoon.

[MuffinToSeeHere]

@Anoushkaka

It's not the fact the baby made a mess it's the fact that the parents didn't care. Practically encouraged him to do it and half heartedly tried to clean. Waitress had to come over with a dust pan and brush to clean up the soil while parents sat there watching. Never once apologised to waiting staff for the mess. It was their whole attitude that stinked of entitlement.

Ok so what's the point of moaning about it? You saw one snap shot of their day criticised every part of them taking their young baby out for a meal and now you've started a thread to say how awful, entitled and what crap parents and people they are. Well done do you feel better now?

[Eurodiva]

I was having a pub lunch recently and the absolutely disgusting mess that some parents left for the waiting staff to clear up was bloody shocking! Carpet so bloody filthy they had to close the table so that the carpet could be cleaned.
I commented to the staff and they were furious they said the booking name and phone number was used to call the parents and ban them from coming to the pub again. Some people are so disrespectful!

[Vintagejazzing]

@goinginsaneinthemembrane

Don't they know they should stay at home and never take a baby anywhere?!

Yeah cos that's what everyone is saying on this thread 🙄

[Eyewantobreakfree]

Wouldn’t care about messy eating but the banging cutlery I would finding very annoying.

[Vintagejazzing]

@Q2C4

@Vintagejazzing my DD doesn't spread food everywhere. She just doesn't use a spoon. Many BLW-fed children don't. It can be better for the child if they get to experience the textures of actual food by eating with their hands rather than have everything mushy and be fed from a spoon.

That's fair enough. But I presume you don't order gravy and mash potato for her in a restaurant?

[sparepantsandtoothbrush]

@Q2C4

And if your child won't eat from a spoon, then what?

Give them actual finger foods and not food that's already mushed up for them to fling about?

[LadyRos]

i know of someone who’s 5 and 10yr old go bed at 2/4am because she wasn’t raised with rules.

[Anoushkaka]

I was quite disgusted that some parents think that behaviour is acceptable,as in the parents behaviour not the baby obviously. Where's the respect for staff and other people who are in the restaurant.

[Questionsforyou]

I do know what you mean op, all of the blw people I know let their babies make an almighty mess in a restaurant and then walk off and leave it. It irritates me. At that age my baby could use a spoon but in a restaurant I would have ordered less messy items for sure !!
I wouldn't merrily let my babies pull soil out of a plant either.

Regarding the strapping baby in- I was advised with mine not to strap babies into the highchair as it's quicker to get them out if they're choking.

You do sound pretty judgemental and they sound very PFB.