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Original poster

Ignore and block childminder?

269 replies

Avatari · 16/05/2023 22:18

Several months ago we started looking for childcare and nursery options were not looking great. We managed to find a woman who would come to the house and babysit from 9-5. 2 months before starting she said she would agree to £11.50 an hour to baby sit 1 yr old. The week before she was due she told us her husband said she couldn't work for less than £13 so we agreed. As we were pretty stuck at that point, I was back at work in 5 days with no alternative.

She hasn't been great. At one point she told us on the Sunday she wouldn't be available that week. Then would get annoyed when we told her there were school holidays so we wouldn't need her. We have been looking for alternative care and managed to get a nursery place starting next week. We told her as soon as we knew, end of April that wed only need her 3 more weeks. So this week should have been her last week. Except we have covid. So told her we wouldn't need her.
We were intending to send her a gift to thank her for her help and send her this week's money.

EXCEPT she has just sent a message to DH saying that we need to pay for June and July as we had a contract. There was no contract. We never specified when we would need her until. She also said she was a single mother and has three children. She has repeatedly told us about her husband.

We are now inclined to not offer to pay this week just ignore and block now. But just wanted thoughts that this is reasonable and reassurance that she hasn't got a leg to stand on.

OP posts:
Fredthefrog · 16/05/2023 22:21

I think you should pay her the final week ad it isn't her fault you have covid but ignore the rest.

Tinkerbyebye · 16/05/2023 22:23

I would pay the final week and that’s it

Daffodil92 · 16/05/2023 22:24

Honestly the whole set up seems a bit of a shambles on both parts.
That said, she’s behaved quite unprofessionally and been unreliable so I wouldn’t pay her. Is it cash in hand by any chance?

sleepingdragon · 16/05/2023 22:24

How often did you pay her? You did have a contract even if it wasn't a written one, and so need to pay her notice period. It sounds like you were her employer, so whatever reasons you have for not wanting her to work for you anymore I would be careful not to end up in an employment tribunal especially if you have not properly set up the contract.

ourflagmeansdeath · 16/05/2023 22:25

I mean I'd just pay the final week to keep peace but defo not pay for June and July it makes no sense at all

LizHoney · 16/05/2023 22:26

She's an arse. That is clear. You can join her in those depths and save a week's money. Or you can go high, even when she's gone low, and do what you said you would.

Original poster
Avatari · 16/05/2023 22:26

Daffodil92 · 16/05/2023 22:24

Honestly the whole set up seems a bit of a shambles on both parts.
That said, she’s behaved quite unprofessionally and been unreliable so I wouldn’t pay her. Is it cash in hand by any chance?

It was cash in hand. She was essentially a babysitter. It was a bit of a disaster but we basically put up with it until we could find alternative care.

OP posts:
AtrociousCircumstance · 16/05/2023 22:27

No contract. Pay her for the week and then make it clear that’s the end of the arrangement. Then block.

CreeperBoom · 16/05/2023 22:28

I actually think you are on dodgy ground. It sounds like she is not a childminder, but a nanny. You should be employing her, paying NI, tax and holiday pay, etc, etc.

You (and she) should have been clear upfront about holidays and notice period. I actually think you have treated her pretty badly, though she hasn't been professional either.

Probably for the best you have found something else, and I think you should pay until one full month after you gave her notice as a minimum.

I hope you are prepared for nursery charging when you are not there, they are closed for xmas, etc.

Daffodil92 · 16/05/2023 22:30

Cash in hand. There’s no way she will take OP to a tribunal, she’s almost certainly not paying tax or claiming in the side.

SnackSizeRaisin · 16/05/2023 22:30

Sounds like you've been illegally employing her. She has been working as a nanny and they are not usually able to be self employed. Is she Ofsted registered? You aren't allowed to pay someone to look after your child on a regular basis unless they are registered.

I would pay her the last week and hope she goes quietly.

Fatkittythinkitty · 16/05/2023 22:30

I agree with the previous poster - a shambles. Way too casual an arrangement for a young child who needed looking after for a whole day.

I'd compromise. Give her 4 weeks money as that's a fairly standard working arrangement.

Sprinkles211 · 16/05/2023 22:30

If she's not registered anywhere she can't give you a contract. She's essentially a baby sitter and they are as and when needed only.

Notimeforaname · 16/05/2023 22:31

Pay her for the last week. Then block..

SnackSizeRaisin · 16/05/2023 22:34

Also what difference does covid make? Are people really still using that as an excuse? Surely most employers would just tell you to go to work regardless

30not13 · 16/05/2023 22:34

She isn't a childminder, she is a babysitter for one.
For two, you should have looked into being an employer a little more thoroughly.
For three, Her personal circumstances don't matter.

You have an implied contract as she has been working to your terms for however long you have employed her.
In the absence of written terms I would assume that if you pay weekly then you are due her one weeks notice or pay in lieu of notice. Or monthly, a months notice/pay.

Don't be a dick.

Original poster
Avatari · 16/05/2023 22:34

Just to expand. She is not a nanny. She only came two days a week and DH was working from home so actually did most of the lunch prep, putting down for nap etc. She basically kept baby busy so he could focus on work.

She is definitely more a babysitter than a nanny.

OP posts:
cyncope · 16/05/2023 22:37

She's not a babysitter or a childminder.

You were employing her 9-5 to work in your home.
Sounds like you were doing so without fulfilling your legal responsibilities by registering as an employer and deducting tax and NI.

I think you should pay her a month's notice and next time do some research before you employ someone. Cash in hand is illegal.

Original poster
Avatari · 16/05/2023 22:38

SnackSizeRaisin · 16/05/2023 22:34

Also what difference does covid make? Are people really still using that as an excuse? Surely most employers would just tell you to go to work regardless

We just wanted to be sick alone in our own home without having to feel awkward with her here.
We were using it as an excuse for anything, like I said we were going to pay her and think we will offer to now as it seems general census is to go with that.

OP posts:
HateLongCovid · 16/05/2023 22:38

SnackSizeRaisin · 16/05/2023 22:34

Also what difference does covid make? Are people really still using that as an excuse? Surely most employers would just tell you to go to work regardless

Covid can still make lots of people feel very poorly. It's not an excuse, it's a reality!

Justalittlebitduckling · 16/05/2023 22:38

Was she a registered childminder? Did you have a contract?

cyncope · 16/05/2023 22:38

Avatari · 16/05/2023 22:34

Just to expand. She is not a nanny. She only came two days a week and DH was working from home so actually did most of the lunch prep, putting down for nap etc. She basically kept baby busy so he could focus on work.

She is definitely more a babysitter than a nanny.

Babysitters look after children in the evenings while they're in bed.

It doesn't really matter what title you give her, she was working for you as a 'home childcarer', regular days and hours so this should have been an employment.

IamAlso4eels · 16/05/2023 22:42

Cash in hand isn't illegal, lots of people are still paid in cash, however .even if paying cash the employer should be deducting NI and tax first.

OP, it sounds like she fits the definition of an employee, specifically a nanny rather than a babysitter - providing care in your home over full days on a regular basis for an agreed hourly rate whereas babysitters tend to be for shorter time periods and less regular.

Agree that it all sounds like a mess and you haven't been thorough with checking what your obligations are. A written contract protects both sides however she could argue that she has an implied contract, particularly if she has messages or emails from you confirming the details of her employment including dates and expected start/end date.

You are potentially on shaky legal ground here and she might well have a case if you'd previously agreed she would be employed until July and have now gotten rid of her without prior warning or notice.

HateLongCovid · 16/05/2023 22:43

Sounds like a very nice job, 9 - 5 entertaining the baby, Husband on hand to help if required. Sounds great!

backawayfatty1 · 16/05/2023 22:45

Childminder here - she's not a childminder. Strict requirements (assuming UK) which include watching children at my home unless it's less than 2 hours. If she was watching your child at your home then nanny/babysitter/home help. In terms of employee/self-employed, that's an agreement between the two of you. Childcare providers are not required to be employed. Sounds like no clear contract so officially no notice required. I'd personally pay the week of sickness and block

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