AIBU to still expect them to pay their share of the holiday?

[somethingunpredictable2012]

We have booked a holiday for 4 families (been booked and planned for over a year), however one couple have announced they are expecting and so won’t be coming on the holiday as baby will be 2/3 months old when holiday comes round so they don’t want to go. The couple have paid the deposit but the balance of the holiday is now due. They haven’t mentioned paying their share of the rest of the cost of the holiday and when asked about the holiday at the time of their pregnancy announcement they simply said “oh yeh, we won’t be coming now, which is a shame, but never mind there will be other holidays”. Their conception and pregnancy has been difficult (no one was aware they were even trying for a baby previous to the announcement) and so bringing up the money/holiday has been difficult due to the issues they have had as there never seems to be a good time. But with the balance of the holiday now due and myself and DH having booked the holiday we are liable for the full amount if the other couple don’t pay their agreed part of the holiday. (Lesson learned never to do that again!). One couple have already paid their share in full and don’t want to pay anymore to split the cost of the 4th couple not coming. The other couple think we should just split the cost between us and suck up the extra cost (£800) so as not to put any more pressure on the couple not coming. The couple have ignored all messages relating to paying the final payment, but DH thinks they should pay up and I should contact them directly and insist they pay their share as agreed. I hate confrontation and don’t want to add to their issues if they are having a difficult pregnancy, but at the same time I don’t think it’s fair they just assume we will all now pay their share, as that wasn’t the cost we all agreed to and we could have actually found somewhere smaller which would have been cheaper. Obviously trying for a baby isn’t always easy or predictable but they would have known this may happen when we booked the holiday, but didn’t mention anything and they seem to have just washed their hands of it like it’s no longer their problem it’s now ours to sort out. It’s obviously causing a lot of tension between everyone involved. What would you do? Is it unreasonable to still expect they pay their share even if they don’t want to come anymore?

Could you see if anyone else wants to go so then no one is out of pocket?

Do the non-attending couple have insurance to cover this?

If the baby isn’t born and it will be 2-3 months old by the time the holiday on, can they not just lose the deposit? I’m not sure about all companies, but some just let you lose the deposit once it’s cancelled within a few months before? If there is absolutely no way to cancel without the full balance being due, you could speak to them in person or on a phonecall. If they knew the terms and conditions before booking the holiday then they should pay but if they didn’t maybe they just think because they cancelled in time, no money is lost except the deposit paid?

Yes, they should pay if there is no way out of cancelling their part of their holiday.

Don’t you normally just lose your deposit if you cancel a holiday with months to spare?

They probably don’t realise as it’s quite uncommon. Did you spell out at point of booking that the whole cost of the holiday was non refundable and effectively couldn’t be cancelled?

You need to word a (nice) message,

1. Pay up, and 2) Contact your insurance or 3) Find another couple to go....but 4) Pay up

I assume it's a large villa or something, so not possible to cancel 'their share'.

It's a difficult one OP. I can see your DH point, but I wouldn't want to be the one to push it!

but DH thinks they should pay up and I should contact them directly and insist

One couple have already paid their share in full and don’t want to pay anymore to split the cost of the 4th couple not coming

I think they should pay their share - or at the very least acknowledge that they committed to paying it not just ignore you...

However why is it just down to your to sort. Surely those who expect then to pay should be contacting them? What will happen if the 'share paid' couple refuse to pay more?

Would insurance cover someone changing their mind because they've had a baby? Doubt it.

Could you find another couple to go? I'd try, but if not ask them to pay their share of balance under terms of contract. If they don't it will spoil your friendship.

Tricky really. The point of paying a deposit is that you lose that it you don't follow through, not the entire cost of the booking. I think at most you can cancel and ask them to pay the whole deposit (not just their 25%) because they're the reason it isn't going ahead, but I'd be surprised if they paid up.

Why does your DH think they should pay up but you be the one to contact them?!

Could you contact holiday company and see if booking could be amended to something smaller?

As it’s one booking in one property together if we cancel we will all lose the deposit we have paid (we each paid a share). We all knew this when we booked that it was one booking etc. Obviously if you book a holiday and you cancel and are fine with losing the deposit that’s your choice, but this situation is tricky because it doesn’t just affect them, it affects 3 other families. I don’t think they have insurance and I’m not sure it would cover it anyway as there wouldn’t be a valid medical/pregnancy related reason to cancel as it’s their choice not to travel with the baby. In their situation I would feel really guilty about not paying my agreed share and not even checking the others are able to pick up the extra cost, but they obviously don’t, and I really feel like they should pay their share but I’m not sure whether it’s an unreasonable expectation so I wanted to get other’s views.

I think the couple should either pay their share or pay your lost deposits, if you have to cancel the holiday and rebook somewhere smaller.

In reality they probably won't do either and unfortunately will be a lesson learned never to organise a big group holiday again.

How long since they informed you they weren't coming and why didn't you amend the booking at the time. If they gave plenty of notice then they aren't liable for you not changing it.

This

I would try this and then if it is not possible either it is cancelled and the pulling out couple need to repay the lost deposits to the 3 other couples or it goes ahead and the pulling out couple pay their share - either way it is their decision to pull out that has caused this.

Did you book the property through Airbnb or through a villa type company?

Just wondering if you could downsize the accommodation?

I would definitely say something about them paying the rest (or like pp have suggested and paying your list deposits if you cancel). How selfish can you get?? I can't get my head around this. What if they'd made the booking? Would they just suck up the extra cost? I'd be prepared to lose a friendship over this. Friends don't shaft each other!

If its a package the couple not going loose their deposit and either 1) you all have to pay extra for under occupancy to make up for the couple not going or 2) you pay a minimal admin fee to cover a name change if between you, you know of another couple who would like to go (that everyone else is happy with going) or 3) you cancel the holiday package and move it to something cheaper again you will incur admin fees (and other people may also decide to also drop out) or 4) although your DH feels the couple now not going have messed you about you wouldn’t have a leg to stand on expecting them to still subsidise everyone else’s holiday that they are now not going on.

If its not a package I’m not sure where you would stand now. But surely as unfair as it maybe your DH can’t seriously think the couple now not going pay up and subsidise everyone else’s holiday?

Look at the terms and conditions of your booking and or speak to a travel agent if you used one or the villa letting agent to see what can be done then remaining couple have a meeting and decide to either cancel, downsize the accommodation or you all pay extra for the couple not going or you see if between you, you know another couple that you are all equally happy to holiday with.

It’s one large property we booked and we have looked and can’t find anything smaller for the dates that would still fit the rest of us with the company we booked with in the same area. Prices have also gone up a lot since we booked. So the only option is to lose the deposit and book elsewhere. But obviously we didn’t want to lose our deposit which isn’t a small amount.

and I really feel like they should pay their share but I’m not sure whether it’s an unreasonable expectation so I wanted to get other’s views.

Not unreasonable exactly (at least for them to cover your losses) but certainly unrealistic.

How much was the total deposit? Less than £800?

That's tricky. Can you speak with the company you booked with and see if they have any smaller properties that you can transfer the booking to ?

If not I'm sorry but I would mention it to then because it's really not fair on the rest of you

That's a pretty awful thing to do.

If I was the couple not coming then I would expect people to understand why, but I would do something like offer to pay if you couldn't find or wasn't allowed to book in someone else.

Not only has this couple caused problems between you and them, they have also caused potential issues between you and the other couple who are not willing to split the cost as well. Great way to get a holiday off to a massively divisive start.

I'd never want to talk to them again if they behaved like this. It's horribly entitled behaviour.