Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Petty AIBU but… sandwiches!

389 replies

Flyinggeesei234 · 15/05/2023 12:55

I make my partner sandwiches to take to the office most weekdays.

I do this in the evening then put them in the fridge for him to take in the morning.

If he decides to work from home instead, he still eats the sandwiches, despite lots of other options instead - eggs on toast, salad, quiche etc we have in the house.

This annoys me as it seems so lazy and I have sandwiches to make again for the next day. He could save the ones I made for the following day.

I’d love to know if this would annoy others too. It drives me mad.

OP posts:
BillyNoM8s · 15/05/2023 13:36

TooOldForThisNonsense · 15/05/2023 13:33

He’s not unreasonable to eat the sandwiches but you are unreasonable to make a grown man’s packed lunch. I haven’t made packed lunches for my kids since they were in primary school.

Well, I'm a grown woman and I'd be delighted if someone made me sandwiches Grin

I don't get the angst. It's not like he's commanded her to be sandwich maker for life! OP says he pulls his weight. She's just got bread-induced rage 🤷‍♀️

KarmaStar · 15/05/2023 13:37

😀soggy sandwiches! Ask him before you make them if he is going into the office or not,if not don't make any!but two day old sandwiches are too soggy sorry😃

Scalottia · 15/05/2023 13:38

ChristmasFluff · 15/05/2023 13:30

Yeah, it's crazy on here! I always made the lunches because I was doing mine anyway - ex-DH ironed my uniform because he was ironing his shirts anyway. He got up before me and would bring me a cup of tea in bed before he went to work. When my hours changed I had his coffee and toast ready when he came down from his shower.

Isn't this just what happens when you care about someone? You do small acts of kindness for eachother.

Yep. This forum is like another planet sometimes. It's called mutual respect and love for your partner, doing nice little things for each other.

OP if you're not happy with the arrangement then discuss it with him. How can anyone here help you? Either keep making the sandwiches or don't. How is this even a thread? I despair, honestly.

Therealjudgejudy · 15/05/2023 13:38

What do you put in his sandwiches?

(Love a good sandwich thread😂)

Hugasauras · 15/05/2023 13:38

If you make them on a Sunday night then by Tuesday lunchtime I'd not sure they'd be that appetising tbh.

AliceOlive · 15/05/2023 13:38

Flyinggeesei234 · 15/05/2023 13:22

Not weird. If he’s home he has access to our Freud he, toaster, cooker etc
and can make whatever. The reason
for taking sandwiches into the office is that those things aren’t at the office.

I would have thought that was obvious. Maybe not!

Show quote history

Sometimes a sandwich is just a sandwich.

🤣🤣🤣

Sorry, couldn’t help myself.

I am actually the opposite and get annoyed if my husband doesn’t eat what I make.

Do you want the sandwiches? Maybe you should eat them first.

Bluebirds1987 · 15/05/2023 13:38

PlacidPenelope · 15/05/2023 13:07

Oh for goodness sake this is really petty and verging on nasty.

You make the sandwiches for the purpose of him eating them for lunch, he eats them for lunch - you think he should faff around making something different when there is already pre-made lunch available just because he is at home? Is it really such an arduous task to make a couple of sandwiches in the evening that results in you resenting him eating them when he works from home and think he should save them for when he is in the office and spend time making something else when he is at home?

If it really is making you so annoyed then re-divide up the tasks but imo you are unreasonable and being rather silly.

This!

NewNovember · 15/05/2023 13:38

ZeroFuchsGiven · 15/05/2023 13:26

That sounds utterly vile, Ive seen this mentioned on here before and I can honestly think of nothing worse than a defrosted sandwich.

Show quote history

So my sounds you have clearly never tried them or at least think you haven't. Do you not realise M and S , Tesco etc sandwiches are all pre frozen . Home frozen sandwiches taste equally fine.

TrundleToes · 15/05/2023 13:39

ZeroFuchsGiven · 15/05/2023 13:26

That sounds utterly vile, Ive seen this mentioned on here before and I can honestly think of nothing worse than a defrosted sandwich.

Show quote history

I’m trying to imagine what type would be the most revolting upon defrosting.

Tomato, cucumber and lettuce? Egg mayo? Yum 🫤

Notthisagaineh · 15/05/2023 13:39

To those who think making your partner’s lunch is weird, what should I change? I’m an early riser and set about making my lunch. I shred lettuce, slice cucumber, tomato, celery, pepper, cut some cress. I either put it on bread or into a salad bowl with some protein. My partner, at this point still asleep would then do exactly the same thing, if I hadn’t made his at the same time. Which is weirder?

Lifesagamethentheytaketheboardaway · 15/05/2023 13:39

When I was little, my dad used to do all the kid related stuff in the morning; getting us breakfast and teeth cleaned and ready for nursery and packing our bags. My mum would make the lunches and he was being healthy so asked her to make him a salad rather than sandwiches. She did. Then one day, she called his work at lunch to check something with him and his colleague answered and said , “oh, he’s just nipped out to the chip van to get his chips to go with his lunch.” Hahaha. He got caught out and my mum stopped messing about with salads and he had to do his own for a week until she let him away with it!

CreationNat1on · 15/05/2023 13:40

Do you wipe his bum bums for him too?

GalileoHumpkins · 15/05/2023 13:40

My husband just made me a cup of tea, the infantilizing fucker, how the fuck dare he?

ToeJabbyRun · 15/05/2023 13:41

I make DH sandwiches (he does the ironing, it's a deal I'm happy to make). I'd be more pissed off if he didn't eat the sandwiches I made, and yes 2 day old would be thrown away

Bellaboo01 · 15/05/2023 13:41

NewNovember · 15/05/2023 13:38

So my sounds you have clearly never tried them or at least think you haven't. Do you not realise M and S , Tesco etc sandwiches are all pre frozen . Home frozen sandwiches taste equally fine.

Show quote history

Are they seriously frozen and then defrosted!! Yuck!!

DanceMonster · 15/05/2023 13:42

NewNovember · 15/05/2023 13:38

So my sounds you have clearly never tried them or at least think you haven't. Do you not realise M and S , Tesco etc sandwiches are all pre frozen . Home frozen sandwiches taste equally fine.

Show quote history

That’s why I don’t like shop bought pre packaged sandwiches either. Because defrosted sandwiches are rank.

ZeroFuchsGiven · 15/05/2023 13:42

NewNovember · 15/05/2023 13:38

So my sounds you have clearly never tried them or at least think you haven't. Do you not realise M and S , Tesco etc sandwiches are all pre frozen . Home frozen sandwiches taste equally fine.

Show quote history

I dont waste money on pre made sandwiches but on the rare occasion I havehad to I have never once had one that actually taste nice, they are horrible. I guess now I know why.

ittakes2 · 15/05/2023 13:43

i would be mad if I had of gone to the effort and he didn’t eat them that day - are you really expecting him to eat old sarnies? The bread would be hard.

BillyNoM8s · 15/05/2023 13:44

CreationNat1on · 15/05/2023 13:40

Do you wipe his bum bums for him too?

If he becomes infirm she might choose to care for him. Imagine the horror.

Do you do nothing kind for your partner?

Since when has making a sandwich become a demeaning task? My husband makes 95% of the cups of tea. Should he be outraged?

CoronationKicking · 15/05/2023 13:44

"Not weird. If he’s home he has access to our Freud he, toaster, cooker etc
and can make whatever."

Well presumably he wants a sandwich for lunch so that's what he eats.

UWhatNow · 15/05/2023 13:44

TheyAreMyBhunasPete · 15/05/2023 13:31

Oh fuck off with the comments about making your partner sandwiches. Should I never cook dinner for my husband because he's a grown man? How about we use separate bins so he doesn't take my rubbish out for me? Maybe I'll get another laundry basket because god forbid I do a women's job for a man.
Do none of you ever do anything for your partners? Do you even like them?

He takes out the rubbish ‘for you’ does he? Just your rubbish then? You’ve just outed yourself as a typical domestic handmaid who gets defensive when her 1950s worldview gets challenged. Meanwhile the rest of us have husbands who don’t need their wife to be their mummy and are quite capable of doing their fair share. And that doesn’t just mean getting a big boy medal for emptying the bins once a week.

Bellaboo01 · 15/05/2023 13:45

Notthisagaineh · 15/05/2023 13:39

To those who think making your partner’s lunch is weird, what should I change? I’m an early riser and set about making my lunch. I shred lettuce, slice cucumber, tomato, celery, pepper, cut some cress. I either put it on bread or into a salad bowl with some protein. My partner, at this point still asleep would then do exactly the same thing, if I hadn’t made his at the same time. Which is weirder?

None of that is weird and is perfectly normal. Packing your partners lunch as you are doing yours is great.

But, the OP is upset about her sandwiches that she's made for him being eaten if he is at home.

charabang · 15/05/2023 13:45

I don't understand why you are happy for him to eat your sandwiches at work but not at home. Isn't it the same result?

BuggerOffAndGoodDayToYou · 15/05/2023 13:45

My DH WFH most days and makes his own lunch (and DSs) when I’m at work (term time only). I don’t work full days every day and if he knows I’ll be home before 2 he always makes me some lunch too and pops a silicon cover over it for when I’m home. During school holidays I make the lunches (if I haven’t gone out). But I would never expect any of us to eat sandwiches that were over 24 hours old….

Today he made me a nice salad with some cold roast chicken… he’s a prince 😊

Scalottia · 15/05/2023 13:46

CreationNat1on · 15/05/2023 13:40

Do you wipe his bum bums for him too?

Fucking hell engage your brain.