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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Petty AIBU but… sandwiches!

389 replies

Flyinggeesei234 · 15/05/2023 12:55

I make my partner sandwiches to take to the office most weekdays.

I do this in the evening then put them in the fridge for him to take in the morning.

If he decides to work from home instead, he still eats the sandwiches, despite lots of other options instead - eggs on toast, salad, quiche etc we have in the house.

This annoys me as it seems so lazy and I have sandwiches to make again for the next day. He could save the ones I made for the following day.

I’d love to know if this would annoy others too. It drives me mad.

OP posts:

WhotheHellisEdgar · 15/05/2023 13:02

If you made his sandwiches for Monday why does it matter if he eats them in the office or at home? You've said this is how you've divided up tasks, so are you trying to get out of some of your tasks?

bussteward · 15/05/2023 13:03

Stop making packed lunches for a grown man and divide the chores some other, less mad, way.

Booklover40 · 15/05/2023 13:03

Sandwiches wrapped in foil/cling film and left in the fridge overnight do not go "stale"!

Do you think that supermarket bought sandwiches are made fresh every day and the ones from that day discarded? Of course they're not!

BarbaraofSeville · 15/05/2023 13:03

I'm surprised that so many people are saying they wouldn't eat two day old sandwiches.

Every supermarket, garage etc in the country sells millions of them every day, at considerably higher cost than home made. Many will be past 2 days old and someone is eating them.

Lifesagamethentheytaketheboardaway · 15/05/2023 13:04

As long as you both do stuff like this for each other then I think it is fine. I wouldn’t leave sandwiches for 2 days. I’d have them that day like he is.

But that’s only if he is also doing stuff for you, and it’s fair. If you’re doing everything and you have to make his sandwiches because he is just lazy then you need to stop.

Bathroomlove · 15/05/2023 13:04

YABU

Im
jot keen on sandwiches made the night before, let alone another day older.

what does it really matter where he eats them? It's the job you chose, just get on with it.

saraclara · 15/05/2023 13:05

bananaboats · 15/05/2023 13:01

I thought you were going to say your annoyed that he doesn't eat them! YABU noone wants 2 day old sandwiches

That! I'd be really annoyed if I made them and he DIDN'T eat them.

No way would I want two day old sandwiches.

I used to make everyone's packed lunches when my DH and kids were home. My DH did loads of other household stuff, including the ironing, and we were a strictly 50/50 housework couple, so I don't read anytihg into you doing it OP. But you're VU to be annoyed that he eats them instead of eating manky ones the next day

aSofaNearYou · 15/05/2023 13:05

As everyone else has said, YABU as most wouldn't want to eat a sandwich from 2 days ago. If it's bothering you I would suggest stopping making his lunches, he's not a school kid.

Thebigblueballoon · 15/05/2023 13:05

Two-day old sandwiches go all soggy and the texture is nasty. I’d eat them on the same day. At least he isn’t wasting food.

pokabubble · 15/05/2023 13:06

2 day old sandwiches are horrible

Tothepoint99 · 15/05/2023 13:06

After sitting on the fence, I've got to drop on the side of, he's a grown man and can make his own sandwiches.

The fact you've raised it, means it is taking up headspace, which it really shouldn't. Tell him what you want.... Make his own sandwiches full stop, or tell you when he's WFH and you make sandwiches for the other days.

saraclara · 15/05/2023 13:06

BarbaraofSeville · 15/05/2023 13:03

I'm surprised that so many people are saying they wouldn't eat two day old sandwiches.

Every supermarket, garage etc in the country sells millions of them every day, at considerably higher cost than home made. Many will be past 2 days old and someone is eating them.

The only premade sandwhiches I'd buy (outside of an emergency) are Pret ones, made that morning. I hate stale bread sandwiches, and bread kept in the fridge goes stale really quickly.

ZeroFuchsGiven · 15/05/2023 13:07

No way I would want 2 day old sandwiches!

PlacidPenelope · 15/05/2023 13:07

Oh for goodness sake this is really petty and verging on nasty.

You make the sandwiches for the purpose of him eating them for lunch, he eats them for lunch - you think he should faff around making something different when there is already pre-made lunch available just because he is at home? Is it really such an arduous task to make a couple of sandwiches in the evening that results in you resenting him eating them when he works from home and think he should save them for when he is in the office and spend time making something else when he is at home?

If it really is making you so annoyed then re-divide up the tasks but imo you are unreasonable and being rather silly.

Comedycook · 15/05/2023 13:07

Yabu. I think it's better he eats them as it's much cheaper than having a cooked lunch generally.

Climbles · 15/05/2023 13:07

What everyone else has said

LorW · 15/05/2023 13:08

Certainly wouldn’t eat 2 day old sandwiches 🤮

BigBerthaDay · 15/05/2023 13:08

I see your two-day-old-sandwich-refusing DP and I offer you my ex:

I used to make his sandwiches the evening before because I was a total doormat and kidded myself into believing it was part of mutual exchange.

If he then took a day WFH, he'd leave the sandwiches in the fridge for the kitchen cleaning fairy and, instead, make elaborate meals for lunch using every ingredient, utensil and surface in the kitchen.

The war zone of his lunchtime antics would still be there when I got in from work because he'd, of course, been far too busy and important to clear up.

So, careful what you wish for, OP. But, regardless, stop making his sandwiches.

murasaki · 15/05/2023 13:09

Two day old sandwiches, no thanks.

Also, as said by many others he can make his own lunch. I don't make dp's unless it's putting some left over dinner in a tupperware. And even then I need to leave it by the kettle so he sees it as he forgets it if in the fridge. The rest of the time he is on his own, like an adult. He seems to cope.

BillyNoM8s · 15/05/2023 13:10

I'd prefer it if he ate the sandwiches rather than "house food".

I also wouldn't want to eat a 2 day old sandwich.

RightWhereYouLeftMe · 15/05/2023 13:10

Flyinggeesei234 · 15/05/2023 12:56

As to why I make his lunch, he does stuff for me too, this is just how we’ve divided some tasks up.

If you're happy generally with the division of tasks, then I don't think he's unreasonable to eat the sandwiches you've made. They won't be as nice on day 2, and he could easily be viewing it as rude to not eat them if you've gone to the trouble of making them.

CurlewKate · 15/05/2023 13:10

People divide up jobs in different ways. I enjoy making packed lunches and have always done it for everyone in the house who wants one. I thought the OP was going to say that he DOESN'T eat the sandwiches and eats other stuff instead. That's what would piss me off!

Lasouthpaw · 15/05/2023 13:11

I make my husbands sandwiches too, I have no problem with it, I don't see why so many have an issue!

But in your situation, no this wouldn't even occur to me to be bothered. I don't think I'd even think about it. But if it did bother me, I'd just stop making the sandwiches and let him make lunch as needed. Seems quite simple.

RandyMiceDavies · 15/05/2023 13:11

I'd see this completely the other way and be annoyed if he ate something else when the sandwiches were sitting there. Wouldn't even cross my mind that he'd eat them the following day- yuck.