Am I ruining the holiday?

[jasmine92]

DP has not said as much but I just feel bad.

We spent a lot of money on a much needed holiday as we’ve been super stressed - we booked a really remote, hot location with the plan being nothing but sunbathing.
We’ve got here and it’s freezing cold, and it’s expected to be until we leave. I feel gutted because a) we spent a lot of money, b) there’s literally nothing else to do and c) he suggested other locations that I said no to because I have been before, and I should’ve gone for them as they’re really hot right now.

I keep mentioning the weather, DP keeps telling me to “make the most of it”, “it’s done now”, “it’s out of our control” etc but I just hate being cold and there’s literally nothing else to do. He told me off for looking at the weather and told me not to look again. But I just am so annoyed. Also gutted as I packed only dresses.

Also, I really wanted a holiday for us to just get away from everything as we’ve been so stressed. I said let’s just put our phones down for the week, and let’s not talk about anything going on at home that’s stressful, and let’s talk about different stuff, but he keeps scrolling each time I even walk 2 metres away. He said I put too much pressure on the holiday by saying this.
I then got upset during breakfast as he wasn’t really saying much and he said he felt pressured to make conversation. He also said he’d had 3 hours sleep and I wasn’t being understanding.

I just feel like a misery guts but I can’t help but be upset, and I don’t feel like he’s understanding. Am I unreasonable?

Your future memories of this holidays are probably going to be either A or B…

A - remember that AWFUL holiday in Greece where it was SO COLD and we didn’t have ANYTHING TO DO and we argued all the time and the kids picked up on the mood and we NEVER WENT ON HOLIDAY for a long time after that

or

B - remember that amazing holiday in Greece where we didn’t realise how cold it’d be and had to go on that silly fun shopping trip and I still have that jacket and we had to get out of the Airbnb and explore the island and found that amazing taverna that made us hot drinks after kids were brave enough to get in the sea and they really picked up on the fact we all made the best of an unexpected situation as a family and will be better stronger people for it!

Sounds like it’s your choice!!

and I’m not really trying to be sarcastic - my husband and I have the same dynamic where I catastrophise and he heroically makes the best of anything whic is really annoying but also amazing and I’m so glad our kids see that!!

enjoy the rest of your hol please! Xx

Thank you so much!

Kindly OP, you are being a little unreasonable, particularly on the no phones rule.

The weather isn't what you expected, there's not much to do and you don't want to hire a car to explore further afield. Sure, it's nice to spend time together and have a proper chat, but there's a lot of hours in the day and not much else to fill it with. I think the no phones rule has to go.

We had a rubbish holiday weather wise in Europe a few years back but you just crack on and make the best of it. Does the hotel do excursions? Or is there an excursion office nearby?

If you tell us whereabouts you are in Greece, there will be people here that can advise.

Failing that, just start drinking early!

She can’t - it would break her ‘no phones’ rule.

We once took our young (1 & 6 years) kids to a little village with a great beach in Cornwall, it rained twice, once for 6 days & once for 7. Over 40 years later, we still laugh when I tell people that fact. I didn't get the kids clothes dry until we got home, yes, it messed up our plans to sit on the beach & build sandcastles, but we were away from home, work & all the stress, just stop moaning & chillax.

Misses the point but I would LOVE a hoodie with a picture of a dolphin in sunglasses on it!

I mean the temperature is just one part of life.
Greek food is amazing, whether at a restaurant or cooking what you find in the supermarket.
Board games and quizzes are on phones.
Freezing cold sea gives you endorphins if you take a dip.
Local wine, cozy night in together…
I do think you’ve both got to put some effort in an appreciate the joy of being alive, not being at work and being together.
Have an adventure - anything could happen

This Morning had a completion and the presenter was in Greece last week wearing a coat.

I didn't think it was that cold in Greece. Maybe just bad luck.

What a life eh? 🙄
I suggest that you change your jobs and home life routine if you want to stay sane. What's the joy in having a stressful life, so stressful that you can't even have a relaxing holiday?
Something needs to change.

I was on Skopelos a couple of years ago. It’s pretty, some nice beaches, some reasonable walking paths, but no particular sites, unless you want to do some Mama Mia tours. There was a massive storm one night so the power was out across the island and it was pretty miserable. The temperature had dropped considerably, everything was dank and dripping, some places had generators but were, well, damp and gloomy. The beaches weren’t that nice in that weather either, which continued to be wet and windy for a few days (earlyish September).

A lot of Greek island destinations, certainly the smaller ones, don’t have that much outside of the Chora for a wander, some boat tours, restaurants and beaches. And that keeps lots of people happy, when the weather’s good. And while I enjoy Greek food, it’s simply hyperbolic to call it ‘amazing’. And there are only so many Greek salads one can consume with gusto.

I feel for the OP. But going around with a face on, mithering at her husband isn’t terribly helpful.

We had a week in Greece when it was really cold. Thessaloniki - beautiful but weirdly cold. But the food was great, the sea was cold but wonderful, the views were fab, it’s packed with cultural activity. Buy a fleece, a rash vest if you think the waters too cold and hire a car to get around. Buck up Bunty! Nothing is stopping you reading, eating and sleeping either which covers a lot of R and R necessities

Hire the car !

Get on a bus train or boat , have some fun,do something different
rest isn’t always about sunshine and sunbathing, a change is as good as a rest right !

I was going to say similar to this.

Get room service. Have lots of sex
Go for walks in the rain, nap, have more sex.
Its not the holiday you planned but try and make the most out of it.

Yes you are ruining the holiday. Things don’t always go the way we hope. Travel to the nearest town and buy something warmer to put over your dresses to be warmer. I could only find a little knitted shoulder wrap when I found myself in this position 40-years-ago in the old Yugoslavia. I never had it off! Just find something to be warmer and make the most if it!

Just go back to your hotel and have loads of mad sex!!! That’ll cheer you both up no end and help with the stress.

My friend booked a wedding in santorini at a time of year it was supposed to be hot, it only rains about 3 days a year, she git rain and cold weather and didn't make this much fuss. It rained so much she has to change the venue due to the steps being slippery.

We went to bars for meals, took a day trip on a dragon boat, went to the old town and looked around the market, if the company is right the weather doesn't matter, unfortunately for your DP the company isn't right. You seem to be focusing on what you can't do not what you can do it must be exhausting to be around someone as negative as you. .are the most of this holiday, save up and book apng weekend somewhere hot later in the year. Cheer up and appreciate what is there

I sympathise, we went to Lanzarote in February and even the locals couldn’t believe how bad the weather was, it was very bloody chilly. We hired a car, not too bad at 150 euros for 4 days, we had to as there was bugger all to do at the hotel. They had an indoor swimming pool but the cheeky beggars wanted to charge £20 each for a swim, criminal, and you had to wear a swimming cap 🤣. The world is very topsy turvy with unpredictable weather all over. We had hailstones the size of golf balls , they were incredible, the locals were astounded. Have fun in the bedroom, we did, not much else to do, 😋

Where in Greece? There is sooooo much to do. It’s lovely.

Sorry you feel like your holiday has been ruined! I feel your pain though, in January me and my hubby flew to an 8k holiday in the maldives for our honeymoon for 12 nights. When we got there I got horrendous flu and was really poorly for the first 4 days and had to have antibiotics then the next 4 days just as I felt better, it absolutely poured down the whole time and I mean literal monsoon 😭 and the holiday was a literal beach/watersport holiday and we couldn't do any of it. The last 4 days we were so fed up and we just wanted to leave! It's honestly the most disheartening thing ever, especially when you've saved and saved and were looking forward to it. Its easier said than done but try and enjoy your time together in a different location. We didn't even have shops or other restaurants to look at because we were confined 3 days a week to the same restaurant and same table 🙃 gotta laugh now though! Xx

This happened to us in Portugal once. We had a week of looking at rain. We were OK though as we walked into town in the evenings and had a lovely meal. We read books, walked and relaxed. We had no phones as it was that long ago. No TV either as there were no English channels.

Wow.. you’re in Greece on holiday and there’s “ nothing to do”?! Tavernas, walks, talk, read, use hotel facilities, relax, play mini golf or tennis, board games, enjoy new surroundings, meet some other people. I truthfully cannot in a million years comprehend anyone being bored on holiday in a foreign country!!!

You can still read

You sound as if you're being a PITA, spoiling your holiday and DP's as well. In his place I'd be questioning whether I want to be with you if this is how you deal with a disappointment.

Yes you're ruining it. Can't you build a fire and get cosy, borrow something warm and go for a walk.

Sadly you can't rely on the weather ever, but you can be present and be with your DP, so do that.