To think friend was embarrassed by what I wore?

[bartygk]

I met up with friends for lunch and drinks. They were dressed casually, one was in a long silk kind skirt with trainers and the other two were in jeans.

I had on a black strap dress with a slit and heels, I saw friends eyes widen when I walked in and it made me worry I was overdressed compared to them.

I probably would have just made a joke about it and said… whoops! Looks like Im massively overdressed!

Who cares , no such thing as overdressed as long as you look good.

wear what makes you feel good!

Wow, that's an awful lot to read into what someone is wearing.

My late dm always dressed up she was known as glam mum to my friends-even to tesco she'd ear a nice suit

i do miss her

I think the only times I’ve felt like I’ve misjudged my outfit is when I’ve felt:

-too hot or cold
-too uncomfortable eg sitting eating at a restaurant in very tight jeans
-too impractical eg if your friends wanted to stroll around the park after lunch because it was a sunny day and your 4 inch heels weren’t suited to walking
And how practical it is to get home (walking, bus or whatever) if you’re not driving back.

You could stick a pair of flats in your handbag if you’re deliberating over heels and not sure of the exact plans or venue.

It’s hard to know without more idea of the dress or shoes but I’d definitely dress differently for a hot date or going out dancing and drinking where I wanted to look deliberately sexy, (let’s face it a dress slashed to thigh is fairly sexy) and a sit down meet up with girlfriends.

I like to think I wouldn’t judge though.

There’s dressing up and being more formal and then there’s just wearing something inappropriate for the setting. If I went out for lunch with friends none of us would be wearing a little strappy dress and heels, particularly when it’s been freezing and it would look out of place.

In your shoes I would have asked my friends if they were going glam. It does sound like you were overdressed for a day occasion, sorry.

It's not so much over dressed as weirdly dressed as if going out for an evening.

I’m so confused as to how you think it’s a “weird” outfit. I see people in dresses and heels going out for lunch/cocktails all the time. It’s also been very hot and sunny in my area Rex. Calling it a “weird” outfit is not indicative of reality. Maybe it’s an age thing?

I wouldn't worry OP. I'm usually overdressed everywhere I go because that's just how I dress. I think people these days are overly casual. Even on a night out most wear jeans.

What was everyone else in the place wearing?
Need to see the dress & shoes to better answer

Heels are very rare for daytime now unless a very posh place, but you might not have known that

I genuinely couldn’t be arsed to figure out all these “dress codes” that certain posters are sneering about. Some of you must have to get changed ten times a day lest you wear dog walking clothes for the school run, or (horrors!) work clothes to the pub.

It does amuse me that some people are so convinced that they and they alone know how to dress for every eventuality, and everyone else is either under or overdressed by their specific standards.

Yes exactly. I generally over dress in the day time but it's day dresses. Of course wear what you want but wearing evening wear in the day time will get a second look.

I wear dresses all the time. I often wear heels with dresses- during the day, at lunch time .

I can also tell the difference between a day dress and going out for as another poster said "a date or going out dancing and drinking where I wanted to look deliberately sexy" .

It depends if you’re a bloke OP.

Of course you can be overdressed though.

Funerals and weddings being two prime examples.

Would you show up to a wedding in a Jessica Rabbit style ensemble? Or to a wedding in a Cinderella ballgown? Even the Queen showed up to that random woman's wedding in a coat dress, not the crown jewels.

I used to live in high heels, but just throwing it out there, they look a bit common in the daytime nowadays - especially if it was a stiletto heel and not a chunkier heel. With the exception of weddings, formal events I think a lot of stylish women would wear nice trainers, flat sandals, wedges, loafers etc. On a night out absolutely the higher the better, but if you were tottering around the town centre when you were on your way to meet them in the day I can understand how they might think it was a bit OTT.

I also think it depends on how old you are.

You can wear what you want!

Don't worry about it

@thecatsthecats stupid comparisons which bear no relevance to my comment on OP's situation, which was a cocktail bar, not a wedding or a funeral.

Of course you can be too overdressed, you can also be too underdressed. Would you attend a wedding in a binliner?

I don't see how your friends could be embarrassed by what YOU wore. They weren't wearing it. Who knows? - maybe they felt a bit too casually dressed when they saw you arriving in more dressy clothes. It doesn't matter. At all.

Why does it matter how old I am?

Sorry regardless of my actually OP I really hate this ageist attitude that you can only wear xyz if you’re a certain age. I’m making the assumption you’re a woman and so to have this stereotype reinforced by a female it is really is a disservice to women.

You can wear heels at any age.

You’re very snippy op. Your friends probably didn’t want to mention your dress in case you went all prickly about it! 🦔

Try to lighten up a bit and laugh about things. Did you make a social faux pas? Maybe. I’ve made loads in my time and it’s always best to laugh it off.

OP are you a man or a woman? It makes a big difference.