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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

ID of Starbucks non binary Southampton manager revealed

269 replies

Birthdaygirltoday33 · 13/05/2023 12:42

Their name is Luna Spain

DM link:

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-12077475/Starbucks-manager-sacked-transphobia-rant-activist-terrifies-neighbours.html?ico=related-replace

OP posts:
literalviolence · 13/05/2023 15:25

cakeorwine · 13/05/2023 15:22

Well hopefully Luna will learn from this unpleasant experience and behave in a more decent manner in future. I’m in favour of anything that makes life difficult for men who threaten and intimidate woman. The end justifies the means

Why not just publish the names of all transwomen out there, their jobs, homes etc....Just so people are aware of who they are?

And people know who to boycott just in case they might have to meet a transwoman?

The end justifies the means, after all?

Areb you suggesting all TW are violent offenders? Cos they're not. They offend at the same rate as other males.

Effieswig · 13/05/2023 15:25

cakeorwine · 13/05/2023 15:22

Well hopefully Luna will learn from this unpleasant experience and behave in a more decent manner in future. I’m in favour of anything that makes life difficult for men who threaten and intimidate woman. The end justifies the means

Why not just publish the names of all transwomen out there, their jobs, homes etc....Just so people are aware of who they are?

And people know who to boycott just in case they might have to meet a transwoman?

The end justifies the means, after all?

This is a ridiculous argument.

Who said they had an issue with all trans women?

cakeorwine · 13/05/2023 15:26

I’m surprised you want to protect violent men

The police know who this person is.
I don't think it's right to try to interview friends, parents etc about someone.

I have seen the video a few weeks ago - it's been in the papers, in the media, online, on Twitter etc.

People who know this person will know this person.

Do we need to know everything about them and what people who know them think?

cakeorwine · 13/05/2023 15:28

Effieswig · 13/05/2023 15:25

This is a ridiculous argument.

Who said they had an issue with all trans women?

I bet there are people out there who would boycott a company if they knew a transperson was associated with them.

Do you?

Effieswig · 13/05/2023 15:31

cakeorwine · 13/05/2023 15:28

I bet there are people out there who would boycott a company if they knew a transperson was associated with them.

Do you?

And there are people out there that boycott companies if they suspect someone GC works there?

Whats your point? And what does it have to do with this violent trans identifying male? Or this incident?

KittyAlfred · 13/05/2023 15:31

cakeorwine · 13/05/2023 15:26

I’m surprised you want to protect violent men

The police know who this person is.
I don't think it's right to try to interview friends, parents etc about someone.

I have seen the video a few weeks ago - it's been in the papers, in the media, online, on Twitter etc.

People who know this person will know this person.

Do we need to know everything about them and what people who know them think?

Well I don’t read tabloids because personally I’m not interested in shock-horror reporting and celebrity tittle-tattle. But for the people who do enjoy that stuff, then I think this is pretty standard. It’s normal tabloid journalism. Like if a young woman is murdered we’re told she was an A student and was head girl at school. And if a serial killer is arrested we’re told his former teacher always thought he was tricky. Etc etc. that’s what tabloids do - they report background. Of course it’s not relevant in the grand scheme of things, but it’s no different from other tabloid journalism that we all accept.

KittyAlfred · 13/05/2023 15:33

cakeorwine · 13/05/2023 15:28

I bet there are people out there who would boycott a company if they knew a transperson was associated with them.

Do you?

I can’t imagine anyone boycotting a company just because they had trans employees. I’d certainly boycott them if they supported aggression towards woman though.

MovinGroovinBarbie · 13/05/2023 15:35

He's a loon but I also hate these public witchunts tbh. Even if it was the newspaper that printed it we don't need to support and reshare it.

Problem is it works both ways with GC women also having their faces/names plastered all over articles. I wouldn't feel very safe knowing that a lot of unstable people with extreme views opposing my own know my identity and area of residence.

Brefugee · 13/05/2023 15:36

People boycott businesses for all sorts of reasons. A lot of people were already boycotting Starbucks because of the Mermaids donations.

I boycott a few businesses for reasons that i can't always remember (usually personal experience, sometimes political stance, like Shell back in the day with Ken Saro-wiwa's murder. Or they use battery eggs in their products etc etc)

It is entirely within the bounds of possibility that people boycott companies because they have pride flags, lanyards and so on, everywhere. Or that they boycott a bookshop that stocks GC authors or whatever. It is perfectly ok to boycott a business if they have practices that go against your ideals, morals or beliefs.

ZittingBiting · 13/05/2023 15:37

cakeorwine · 13/05/2023 15:22

Well hopefully Luna will learn from this unpleasant experience and behave in a more decent manner in future. I’m in favour of anything that makes life difficult for men who threaten and intimidate woman. The end justifies the means

Why not just publish the names of all transwomen out there, their jobs, homes etc....Just so people are aware of who they are?

And people know who to boycott just in case they might have to meet a transwoman?

The end justifies the means, after all?

That's a huge straw man.

Nobody is suggesting 'outing' transpersons.

In this instance a male bodied trans identifying person acting in an intimidating way and their employer agreed their behaviour was such and fired them. And it was filmed.And they were claiming transphobia.

Should that be excused?

Should any trans- identifying person be excused of abusive/threatening/intimidating behaviour?

Why?

KittyAlfred · 13/05/2023 15:41

Brefugee · 13/05/2023 15:36

People boycott businesses for all sorts of reasons. A lot of people were already boycotting Starbucks because of the Mermaids donations.

I boycott a few businesses for reasons that i can't always remember (usually personal experience, sometimes political stance, like Shell back in the day with Ken Saro-wiwa's murder. Or they use battery eggs in their products etc etc)

It is entirely within the bounds of possibility that people boycott companies because they have pride flags, lanyards and so on, everywhere. Or that they boycott a bookshop that stocks GC authors or whatever. It is perfectly ok to boycott a business if they have practices that go against your ideals, morals or beliefs.

Fair enough, but that’s not the issue here is it.
This man was aggressive towards a woman, in public, and was filmed doing it.
Why? Because she accidentally referred to another woman as “her”. I’m really saddened and shocked to think that there are women out there who think this is OK.
It’s not OK, and men need to be told that it doesn’t matter if they grow their hair long and wear a dress, if they are aggressive to women then they will suffer the consequences. And in this world of social media, the consequence is having your name and details broadcast. Live by the sword and die by the sword.

Pluvia · 13/05/2023 15:44

QueenoftheNimbleFlyingCat · 13/05/2023 14:33

I agree, but the video did that - what is the necessity for this article?

The article fills in some of the gaps that weren't known. That the woman buying coffee had referred perfectly politely and rationally to a female co-worker as a 'lady', only to be turned on by Juno Spain for not knowing that the other worker was NB. That after the kerfuffle with the man with the camera, Spain physically assaulted the woman by throwing her out out and so on. It gave context.

I can remember lots of people coming out of the woodwork on the day the video was released to tell us that we didn't know what the woman had said to bring that on herself. Now we know.

ZittingBiting · 13/05/2023 15:46

literalviolence · 13/05/2023 15:25

Areb you suggesting all TW are violent offenders? Cos they're not. They offend at the same rate as other males.

Hmm..'trans-women' may not be

But the number of convicted sex offenders who currently identify as trans is huge

https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=committees.parliament.uk/writtenevidence/18973/pdf/&ved=2ahUKEwjtwKS6w_L-AhW6SkEAHR7UDrEQFnoECA4QAQ&usg=AOvVaw1nfGy7VvUMk_Nrwv81ai3h

Ya'll need to stop saying trans women are not a risk when the bar for 'transwomen' is 'anyone who says they're a woman'.

This ideology is why numerous rapes have been listed as committed by women in the UK in the last few years when it was men raping with their penis and later identifying as women.

https://www.google.com/url?rct=j&sa=t&source=web&url=https%3A%2F%2Fcommittees.parliament.uk%2Fwrittenevidence%2F18973%2Fpdf%2F&usg=AOvVaw1nfGy7VvUMk_Nrwv81ai3h&ved=2ahUKEwjtwKS6w_L-AhW6SkEAHR7UDrEQFnoECA4QAQ

HRTQueen · 13/05/2023 15:58

This was an incident between a few people and the company acted appropriately

it happens every day

if Luna was charged as a woman then this is newsworthy that is the news

pictures of Luna with a child have deliberately been published to fire people up and what is the reason to ask Lunas neighbours what Luna is like

shame of those who have fallen for this it’s deliberate to stir up anger the them and us, look at what they are like it’s used again and again

Clymene · 13/05/2023 16:00

HRTQueen · 13/05/2023 15:58

This was an incident between a few people and the company acted appropriately

it happens every day

if Luna was charged as a woman then this is newsworthy that is the news

pictures of Luna with a child have deliberately been published to fire people up and what is the reason to ask Lunas neighbours what Luna is like

shame of those who have fallen for this it’s deliberate to stir up anger the them and us, look at what they are like it’s used again and again

Does it? Do coffee shop managers routinely assault members of the public?

It doesn't happen round where I live.

ZittingBiting · 13/05/2023 16:08

Clymene · 13/05/2023 16:00

Does it? Do coffee shop managers routinely assault members of the public?

It doesn't happen round where I live.

Nor me.

This was 'news' because it was a male bodied but trans-identifying person intimidating a woman to leave the store based on the 'transphobia' of the customer saying the female-appearing server was a 'lady'. But that server apparently identifies as they/them. U

It wasn't news till the male bodied Luna decided to intimidate and abuse a female customer.

WallaceinAnderland · 13/05/2023 16:09

Being named and shamed might make this person, and others with similar entitled views, change their attitude.

It's not ok to demand that others use specified words, let alone assault them if they don't.

Actions have consequences. This is the impact. This will hopefully be a very big learning curve which, frankly by the age of 28 should already have been understood.

Bluedabadeeba · 13/05/2023 16:11

Am I the only one who can't even get past the first few sentences because of the atrocious grammar?!?

limitedperiodonly · 13/05/2023 16:15

QueenoftheNimbleFlyingCat · 13/05/2023 14:47

This isn't a follow up though is it? It doesn't give any more information about the incident.

I am allowed an opinion and I find it unnecessary, you are quite entitled to feel differently.

Of course it is a follow up. It follows up on the original news story.

It also gives more information. We now know that the Starbucks manager goes by the name of Luna Spain and we know the first names of Luna's parents whose surname may or may not be Spain.

We also know the freely given opinions of various anonymous neighbours of Luna and of Luna's former schoolmates. None of these locations have been specified.

There are pictures of Luna but the other people in them have been obscured.

Luna is under police investigation for a public order offence that might be considered to be on the milder scale like threatening behaviour.

But when I say mild, you have to remember it's not that mild when a bloke 30 years younger and a foot taller than you is bellowing in your face.

Context is all. It should be reported just like the cases of people arrested at the Coronation for protesting against the Monarchy.

That happened and includes follow up with friends and bystanders and context.

I want to see it all, no matter how it comes out, because I want to see reporting and am capable of sifting through bias. I believe people are.

You seem to be going along with the "Nothing to see here" line.

Effieswig · 13/05/2023 16:17

HRTQueen · 13/05/2023 15:58

This was an incident between a few people and the company acted appropriately

it happens every day

if Luna was charged as a woman then this is newsworthy that is the news

pictures of Luna with a child have deliberately been published to fire people up and what is the reason to ask Lunas neighbours what Luna is like

shame of those who have fallen for this it’s deliberate to stir up anger the them and us, look at what they are like it’s used again and again

No, what stirs up anger in me is that a woman can be intimidated by a man and people will try and excuse it with ‘I wonder what the woman did’, because the man is trans.

What stirs up anger is that a trans identifying male believes aggressive behaviour is on, because someone called someone she and not ‘them’. Even if the woman involved is GC, Luna thinks it’s ok to be physically aggressive to a woman for not using the correct pronoun.

What angers me is that a trans identifying man can assault a man and people argue ‘but we don’t know what the man’s wife said’. Or justify it with ‘Luna comes across as someone who stands up for their friends and that what they were doing’ or ‘trans people are vulnerable and drawing attention to poor behaviour from trans people is hurting them’

i can 100% believe if Luna was a man presenting as a man, not one person would believe there was a problem naming the misogynist bully.

Pluvia · 13/05/2023 16:21

Does it? Do coffee shop managers routinely assault members of the public?

It doesn't happen round where I live.

Not round here, either.

limitedperiodonly · 13/05/2023 16:24

Whatever we think about identity politics, surely we can all agree that Luna is not suited to a management or customer-facing role and the intervention of the Dally Mail has helped relieve all of us, including Luna, of this burden.

HRTQueen · 13/05/2023 16:30

relived that the Daily Mail has outed one bad manager in a coffee shop

no because they have done the job that they set out to do

KittyAlfred · 13/05/2023 16:32

Pluvia · 13/05/2023 16:21

Does it? Do coffee shop managers routinely assault members of the public?

It doesn't happen round where I live.

Not round here, either.

Nor round here. And that’s why this should be big news, because if we brush it under the carpet then aggressive treatment of women will become even more normalised than it already is. I want Luna to rue the day he clapped and shouted at that customer, and for other angry men to think twice before they do the same.

ZittingBiting · 13/05/2023 16:36

Really? You can't understand English? Even if not conforming to your standards?

Is it the case that educated people like you assume can't possibly read text that doesn't fit with what you were taught?

It must be so difficult for you going through life not understanding really clear English. Sad face 😞

That's not really an intelligent or educated person though is it?

Intelligent and educated people can understand clear English when it's written.

P.S it's also very lower class to attempt to be superior in terms of education or grammar. You seem like the kind of person who thinks that is important.