Paying for our own food - dinner party

[ColdBrewInSummer]

we were invited to a friends house for dinner. Took a bottle of good wine with us, we wouldn’t ever go empty handed.

had a good meal, but they sent us a message after asking for money for each person! I thought this was crazy and I would never ask anyone to pay for their food if I invited them over!

AIBU to be a bit annoyed? We’ve already arranged to have them to ours in a few weeks time and I’m not asking them
for anything!

They aren't Dutch are they?! Everyone I know who has lived there has a similar story of an unexpected after dinner party 😂

Message them back with “Would you like us to leave a review on Trip Advisor as well?” followed by “Can we have a VAT receipt?”

Message back asking for a break down of the bill.Make it painful for them.😀

That is unacceptable to do this.

Are they under a sudden financial pressure do you think?

I would not send them any money.Tell them if you knew it was a paying event you would have opted for a better establishment with a varied menu.

They are not good friends.🌻

If it was planned as a Jacobs join they should have told guests I advance.
Don't pay and cancel the return invite

I just don’t believe people actually do this 😱

Not do I. At all.

This is the answer 😁 but serve mince instead of steak 🤣

Did you take Liebfraumilch or Red Tower

Or White Lightning ?

Seriously, how SHIT was the wine you took?!?

@ColdBrewInSummer - I’d be tempted to tell this ‘friend’ that it is most unreasonable to spring charges for a meal onto their invited guests with no prior warning.

Utterly unacceptable behaviour!

The cheek!

Wow, the audacity! I'd reply with:

"Well this is a bizarre request, I've never been sent a bill by someone who invited me as a guest in their own home before. Maybe we should eat out in future, that way at least we all get a choice in what we are paying for!"

Just reply to them with some laughing emojis.

OP- I would text back that maybe they should have suggested you all went to a restaurant. Asking people to pay to attend a home cooked meal they are invited to is really weird after the event. As a broke student some people did this - but they were totally upfront. I still remember paying a few quid towards a vegetable curry that was basically loads of veg cooked in water with some spices chucked in 😁

This

I'd be tempted to not pay, not have them at yours & not bother with them again!

You could say “Hi, wait until you have been over to us and we can see what the balance is”
Then serve them spam fritters and supermarket swiss roll then you can give them £38 just for the craic.

That is unbelievably rude, I'm not sure how I'd reply. I think I would have to call them and have it out in a conversation. Maybe they somehow think that's the norm??!!!! Completely weird.

This. Skanky people

Wow I can’t believe this!

why do you think they did this and what made them think it was a good idea?

They are not great friends.

Well some people have no manners. I invited a friend over for dinner and she had the cheek to take some drinks away with her after arriving empty handed.

so many are CF. Sorry you have such cheeky friends. Just retract the invitation to dinner. Don’t be a sucker for punishment for their uncouth behaviour.

I bet they are not ponying up to pay their share of the wine

@harriethoyle I think it stands for food muddle- pot luck lunch in most places. I first encountered them in 2004 when I started working for a certain local authority and they can be relentless when there is an early leavers drive!

Were you the only guests or were there others at the dinner who were also charged for the meal?

Ask if that includes service charge and VAT.

I don’t think this is real. It can’t be.