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Original poster

Sending 7 year old to boarding school

528 replies

Bringonsummer19 · 11/05/2023 00:14

So my daughter is currently away (8) on her first residential trip. She is away from Wednesday through to Friday. I already miss her so much and it got me thinking of my sister who is sending her 7 year old away to boarding school in September. Her husband is in the army so will subsidise the fees and it’s aimed at continuity of education. Nonetheless my sister does not work and therefore could settle with DS (albeit husband would have to commute to army base) and they couldn’t afford private school fees.

im i unreasonable to think that 7 is just too young to be away from home unless there is a really valid reason (eg husband posted to Iran)

OP posts:
Kelwar · 10/12/2024 14:29

Sharptonguedwoman · 10/12/2024 09:56

No. Parents posted in the diplomatic service to places where education was not always available/the best. Sometimes dad went, sometimes both. GP nearby to visit/holidays.
People do what they think is best in their own circumstances.

Show quote history

True but as long as the children and their feelings are taken into consideration then there usually isn’t a problem further down the line. If a parent is deliberately ignoring a child’s pleas to be at home, later on that can come back and bite on the backside. Also depends on age.. secondary boarding can be fun as long as the child is keen on going.. anything primary needs to be carefully considered. Little children need their parents. I was 6 and sent away.. I cried throughout most of my primary education.. my cries were ignored. I don’t have contact with my mother now, despite her saying she did things back then in my best interest. The reality is, she was a self serving witch.. and that continued in to my adult life.

Sharptonguedwoman · 10/12/2024 14:33

Kelwar · 10/12/2024 14:29

True but as long as the children and their feelings are taken into consideration then there usually isn’t a problem further down the line. If a parent is deliberately ignoring a child’s pleas to be at home, later on that can come back and bite on the backside. Also depends on age.. secondary boarding can be fun as long as the child is keen on going.. anything primary needs to be carefully considered. Little children need their parents. I was 6 and sent away.. I cried throughout most of my primary education.. my cries were ignored. I don’t have contact with my mother now, despite her saying she did things back then in my best interest. The reality is, she was a self serving witch.. and that continued in to my adult life.

Edited
Show quote history

Goodness I am so sorry, that’s grim.

Christmasmorale · 10/12/2024 14:58

I think 7 is too young - youngest I would only consider form age 13 upwards and only if my child begged to go. And even the, I would be inwardly upset and probably refuse.

We get so little time with them as it is during those young years. My cousins went to boarding school at 7 and they both thought their parents hated them (even though the opposite was true - parents just wanted the best for them and thought they were providing my cousins with better opportunities than they had). My cousins both went off the rails in their teen years despite their expensive schooling, and one got kicked out of the boarding school in the end.

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