To think some people sail through life ?

[Cuberubick]

Please don't think that this comes from a place of envy . It's something that puzzles me . The vast majority of us me included have ups and downs and life is not always fair.

But it strikes me that some people live truly wonderful lives, with no great trauma , no health issues or money woes , great kids etc. Think Richard Brandon for example . I'm not knocking him just using him as an example .

Then there are others who seems to go from one crisis to the next , and have tragedy befall them .

Like I have said for the vast majority of us it's bitter sweet .

Is it a case of mindset ? what you think is what you get ? Who knows .

I’ve often thought the same. I think it helps if you’re born into some £££s and/ or loving functional family.

Some people just don’t seem to realise that not everyone’s gifted a house deposit or have unlimited childcare/ supportive family.

But yeah I think that mindset helps (and the things above help with mindset too). So yeah some people are more privileged and I have to say those people seem to do better. But some people have had a tonne of trauma etc and you wouldn’t know it on the face of it cos they also bounce through life- I’m trying to be one of these people can’t lie 😂

I have had some real tough times in my life, it’s only now at 50 I realise just how hard things were for me as a child. This year so far has seen the loss of a sister and me having two unrelated operations, one for cancer. I returned to work recently and all people say to me is how brave I am. I don’t feel brave but I think the shit show which was my childhood has prepared me for the crap which I am currently facing.

I will be honest and say I have some close friends who haven’t experienced anything like the crap I have and they don’t appreciate how lucky they are. I don’t wish bad stuff on them though, life just isn’t fair and I kind of accept that.

The one thing I have gained from having such tough times is resilience and empathy for others. This means I have some great friends, for which I am really lucky.

See I reckon from the outside a lot of people I know now will reckon I have sailed through life. But that's because I don't really talk about the difficult times.

Yes, I have been lucky and have a good job etc but my goodness I also worked hard to create that "luck". I don't deny the existence of good fortune in getting where I have, but I also know a lot of hard work and long hours went into creating it.

Also, while my parents are wealthy they never give me any handouts. So whilst I appreciate the wealth gave me a good start in life, in terms of a nice home etc, I actually entirely funded my house purchase myself. But I expect people assume I had help.

And I have been through some awful tragedies, I lost my first boyfriend when I was 19 in a horrific accident and lost several close friends in my early twenties in different, all awful, incidents. I can never put into words the impact of these multiple losses close together. And yet through all of that I somehow kept working and succeeding because I "didn't want to make it a bigger tragedy" (my mantra). But people now just see the success and have no idea how much grit it took to even just keep going

The reality is we just don't know what battles people have fought. And in all honesty I wouldn't wish a life of tragedy and stress on anyone (on the flip side I know what I went through made me more compassionate and resilient, I wish I hadn't gone through it all, but I can see the silver lining)

How would you know? All those I’ve met since moving would see my life as amazing. But I’ve been groomed and a victim of child sexual exploitation and have spent my whole adult life in therapy.
I am resilient because I’ve had no choice not to be. I feel very fortunate to have children and a husband and no need to work. I have a lovely home and land. I look like I sail through. I don’t.

I saw today that Louise Clifford (Max Clifford's daughter) had died from cancer aged 51 and thought of this thread.

Until Max Clifford's fall from grace, people who didn't know that would probably have thought she was sailing through life with a very wealthy father who doted on her.

But from aged 7 she had severe rhematoid arthritis.by her 16th birthday, she had her knees replaced and had to have regular operations.

Her father was Max Clifford with all the fall from grace, trauma about what he was accused of doing/may have done who was imprisoned and died in prison in difficult circumstances.

Then she got cancer and died before she was 52.

That's a lot of tough stuff to deal with.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-12046789/Disgraced-PR-guru-Max-Cliffords-daughter-Louise-51-dies-following-short-battle-cancer.html

One is a known law of Physics. The other is a load of complete codswallop.

What’s interesting in that, is that the person who is credited in discovering gravity spent the majority of his life working with the Emerald tablet which you could argue is a variant of karma in the West😀 and produced what is perhaps the best known translation. Not as easy to separate as you might think.

That's life I'm afraid and you don't know what is happening behind closed doors with someone you perceive to have the perfect life

I think some people can "sail" through certain aspects of their lives and if that's the part you focus on, you forget the rest. a few years ago when I was TTC and suffering miscarriages a friend had 3 pregnancies 1st month trying, no issues. Even timed them to have birth at a preferred time of year etc. I spent my house deposit on treatments and got lucky thank god but for a long time when living in a house too small for my family I couldn't believe how she didn't spend every moment celebrating her good fortune. Even now my first thought is that she has it so easy when in fact that is not true at all and I need to remind myself. I take other things for granted.

He also got in to trouble with the police in his early days