Do you think that women are really cruel?

[Mooshamoo]

I just think that every stage of my life has been destroyed by women.

As a child, it was the adult women that were around me that were the cruellest.

School, the girls were so cruel. I got on with the boys.
college, the same
work, the same.

I just started a new job (remote)and we have been in training for two months. As there is a lot of training.

The way the job works is that we have four managers while we are training. They all do shifts as managers with us. Then when we complete training , we are assigned one full time managers.

During the training, the two female managers only messaged me and called me to tell me what I was doing wrong. They kept telling me I was doing things wrong. They were nasty and cruel to me. The two male managers were different, they were really supportive of me, as I had just started in the job. They said to ask them any questions etc.

When I finished training, I prayed that I would get one of the male managers, which I did. He is very nice and supportive.

Now, a month into the job, we have been told that we will all be assigned a quality coach. Which will be one of three people. The quality coaches are two men and a woman. I've dealt with the two men before and they are lovely, supportive and kind. The woman is a bully and just enjoys having power over people.

Again I prayed to get one of the men, but I got the woman this time. She has been making my life a misery. She is supposed to be supportive and helpful to me, but she has been really abusive to me and she is awful. She enjoys knocking people down. One of my. Other team mates also has her, and also says that she is abusing her really badly. Like as quality coach her job is meant to be supporting and helping you. But she just tells you that you are shit and useless.

My other team mates that have the male quality coaches, say that they are so kind and supportive to them , and are really helpful.

I just wonder, what is this? Why do women always seem to enjoy knocking people down and being cruel?

Again, you are proving my point , by being cruel.

Well done.

Same op... women have tormented me. I work with children and have noticed while boys tend to beat the head off each and start talkin again 5 minutes later, girls use reputation destruction and torment each other verbally and emotionally

You don't have to "know" me for me to "know" you. You don't name change, you give a LOT of information out, and you post repeatedly about the same things, in a distinctive manner.
It's not a bit weird, but your response is. Lots of people will "recognise" you without ever having interacted with you. This is an internet forum, anyone can be reading your posts.

A lot of women feel they have something to prove especially in the workplace. I’ve experienced awful managers too who have been women.

Obviously there are some awful men too but overall in my experience men are far fairer and supportive.

@Mooshamoo you got me

No, I think you’re generalising based on your own experiences.

That's not cruel.

The issue here is not all/some women being cruel. It's your perception of them as being cruel. If someone isn't absolutely kind and gentle and delightful to you at all times you see them as cruel.

Again, you need assistance if you are to see things in a better way.

This really wasn’t cruel op.

Perhaps a little blunt and straight talking, but not cruel.

I have met cruel women for sure but mostly in my life its been the men that have been the nastiest to me 🤷🏼‍♀️
PEOPLE all possess the capability for cruelty, regardless of their sex.

No, in general women are not "cruel". Cruel isn't a word to describe the woman at your workplace - she's bitchy, critical, overbearing, dominant, dismissive, perhaps. Report her to her superior.

In my 40 years on this planet I’ve met cruel men and cruel women.
Some people I’ve met may feel I’ve been cruel towards them, others may not.
I think some women may feel they need to exert their power more to be noticed in more male dominating roles but again, that will only be some.

@Mooshamoo I doubt this poster is going out to search the previous threads of OP in every thread they comment on - only to provide context in a situation where the original post is problematic & seems littered with black and white thinking, indicative of some sort of trauma. 'Destroyed' your life in the first sentence is an example of this.

The posters here aren't being 'cruel', they're saying these things to help you as to have this same issue with every woman you come across, you evidently cannot relate to other women. You are perceiving women here, who are just straight talking, as cruel - arguing with them over it instead of taking points on board. You want to be right in this situation and when you're met with resistance, you call them cruel.

I say this as someone who's been there - sometimes if you're noticing a pattern you do have to look within

They're right though - if you keep posting threads like this, you'll be a 'frequent flyer' and on the radar of regular readers.
They're not acting like they know you, they've just read a lot of what you post.
Most importantly - heed their advice.

BTW, I did not search you. There was no need to.

Having just seen your reply to this perfectly reasonable post, you're probably just a bit delicate. Sorry

Not everyone who disagree with you is cruel! Jesus Christ get some help!

Is she though? Can you really say that, based on the OP's perceptions? I would hesitate to. Maybe she is, maybe not.

Women in positions of power often have to be tougher and harsher than men, to overcome stereotypes. A ‘soft’ woman is likely to be judged more negatively, and disadvantaged, than a ‘soft’ man would be.

Conversely, a woman just not adhering to the ‘soft, kind, nice’ stereotype is likely to be judged as ‘bossy’ or ‘bitchy’ when in fact she’s acting no differently to a man in the same position as her would.

lastly, women are socialized to be passive aggressive, whereas men are encouraged to be direct.

I've probably been luckier in my experience of female relationships than you, OP. I wouldn't say I've never encountered women being arseholes in the workplace, but it's never occurred to me to attribute their arseholery to their sex. At least as many men have been horrible too, because awful and inadequate people need jobs just as much as the pleasant, good-natured ones. So we're bound to come across them from time to time.

From your responses it is clear that you find it difficult to manage any input/ responses from people that are not in agreement with you or critical, even if civil and in your interests. There may be a reason coming from your own history that means it is harder for you to take from women than men, which could be why you are continually trying to affirm this point of view here on a female oriented website. Nothing written here has been cruel. Several posters have disagreed with you, that is all. It very much appears to be you looking for the cruelty in their words.

Are you concerned about the criticism you've been receiving at work and how to address the issues? Perhaps if you share more, posters can provide practical advice or reassurance.

DD has some MH issues. One of the symptoms is that he feel’s people are being awful to her when they aren’t. She takes every conversation and over analyses it until she finds the bits that “prove” her stance. She will ignore anything positive and focus on why people hate her (they don’t)
I won’t diagnose you online OP but it’s something to consider, especially if you post about things like this regularly

Based on the fact that you have already inexplicably branded two posters on this thread as being 'cruel', I don't trust your judgement of what it means for a person to be 'cruel'. I think the problem is that you are overly defensive and sensitive about any challenge or disagreement - that's something for you to work on rather than every woman you meet changing their behaviour in case they inadvertently upset you.

The posters disagreeing with you are not ‘cruel’ as you’ve stated. Also it isn’t weird to recognise posters on here, even if someone name changes if they post about the same topics in the same manner you can easily recognise them.

Your replies are quite abrasive OP. If this is how you come across in the real world then I can see where the problem lies

Yes, women use verbal and emotional abuse.