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Original poster

To go for a drink with friends dad

667 replies

Ionlydrinkondaysendinginy · 28/04/2023 11:55

Iv been friends with this friend for ever and her dad has always been there for me and has messaged me a few times over the years but it's just been jokey flirty stuff nothing much of anything and he messaged me this morning to go round for a few drinks tonight. I want to go but I don't know how my friend will react.
Yanbu. Do what you want its nobody's business
Yabu. You don't cross that line with a friends dad

OP posts:
GoodChat · 29/04/2023 17:31

If there's any supermarket pharmacies near you, they'll be open now.

If not, Google 24 hour pharmacies near you.

Original poster
Ionlydrinkondaysendinginy · 29/04/2023 17:32

Thankyou everyone gonna nip asda

OP posts:
Original poster
Ionlydrinkondaysendinginy · 29/04/2023 17:33

Gourmetfelix · 29/04/2023 17:31

I would go now, will keep my eye on the thread, here if you need me

❤❤

OP posts:
CarrotCake01 · 29/04/2023 17:41

I am sorry that you're struggling OP, this thread has turned really quite sad to look through.
The choices you are making are very self destructive and must be very upsetting for people close to you.
I do wish you well, but I don't think there's a lot any of us on here can really do. You could have 1,000 kind and concerned comments from genuine people telling you that you need support for your mental health, need to give up drinking, need to properly work on yourself and sort yourself out and build up your sense of self and I think you would still shrug it off and say "Fuck it, I'll do what I want. They don't understand."

Sinamin · 29/04/2023 18:09

Ionlydrinkondaysendinginy · 29/04/2023 17:12

Ffs Is that genuinely true, nobody has said that to me, will I be able to get map on bh weekend

Show quote history

I am past the age where this might be an issue but I didn't know this either, this information should be much more widely available!

OP, you have had at least four different sexual partners and one unwanted pregnancy in the last few months. Please, please get yourself down to your local sexual health clinic for a full testing including for HIV.

I don't think there is any point in trying to talk you out of this behavior but if your life is going to carry on like this - and sadly it clearly is, you are putting yourself and your children at massive risk of unpleasant health issues so at the very least insist that your sexual partners wear condoms.

They might not be keen but if they are really into you and know it's that or no sex I promise they will agree eventually. If they don't then you'll know exactly what they think of you so be brave and walk away with your head held high for once.

Also, please consider that if these four men that you've been involved with each have been involved with a similar number of women in a similar time scale the risk of catching sexually transmitted nasties is very, very high!

ReadersD1gest · 29/04/2023 18:11

I am past the age where this might be an issue but I didn't know this either, this information should be much more widely available!
I'm pretty sure the clinic will have covered all the issues with op, as they do with everyone.
Whether she took them on board is another matter entirely.

mexicanandafewdrinks · 29/04/2023 18:22

glad you had a good night x

Original poster
Ionlydrinkondaysendinginy · 29/04/2023 18:31

mexicanandafewdrinks · 29/04/2023 18:22

glad you had a good night x

I did ty x

OP posts:
mexicanandafewdrinks · 29/04/2023 18:35

get the morning after pill and stay away from men for a while, maybe have a few nights in x

Original poster
Ionlydrinkondaysendinginy · 29/04/2023 18:36

The pharmacist said the abortion wouldn't effect the pill at this point but gave me the map anyway as I'm not good at remembering to take the pill. He said I need to go to sh clinic to be tested sti/stds and need to discuss different bc with gp and that I need to be using condoms everytime (which obviously no man is gonna agree to) but the pharmacist was really nice to me about everything so glad I went just in case. Now I can enjoy night out tonight without stressing. Thanks everyone

OP posts:
BadNomad · 29/04/2023 18:38

It doesn't sound like you have many people who support you, so it's incredibly self-destructive to do things that will push those few friends away. You don't know how your friend would have taken you hooking up with her father, but I can tell you how horribly betrayed she is going to feel when she finds out both her friend and her father are doing this and lying to her about it. That's two of her relationships being destroyed. Selfish, selfish people.

ReadersD1gest · 29/04/2023 18:40

that I need to be using condoms everytime (which obviously no man is gonna agree to)
Do you have any agency over your own life at all?? Why do you settle for so very little?

FairyPrincess123 · 29/04/2023 18:43

Ionlydrinkondaysendinginy · 29/04/2023 18:36

The pharmacist said the abortion wouldn't effect the pill at this point but gave me the map anyway as I'm not good at remembering to take the pill. He said I need to go to sh clinic to be tested sti/stds and need to discuss different bc with gp and that I need to be using condoms everytime (which obviously no man is gonna agree to) but the pharmacist was really nice to me about everything so glad I went just in case. Now I can enjoy night out tonight without stressing. Thanks everyone

I presume you're not going to have sex tonight?

BadNomad · 29/04/2023 18:44

If you're not good at remembering to take the pill then go get a coil or the implant. I can see how this is going to go. Drama. You'll get pregnant (it won't be your fault of course) and cause chaos for everyone.

Sakura7 · 29/04/2023 18:45

Why can't you insist on a condom? Or better yet, stay away from men for a while.

Why do you think you have to give in to what the man would prefer?

Any man who refuses to use a condom is showing himself to be an arsehole who has no respect for women. A decent man has no problem using one.

Original poster
Ionlydrinkondaysendinginy · 29/04/2023 18:48

Sakura7 · 29/04/2023 18:45

Why can't you insist on a condom? Or better yet, stay away from men for a while.

Why do you think you have to give in to what the man would prefer?

Any man who refuses to use a condom is showing himself to be an arsehole who has no respect for women. A decent man has no problem using one.

Cmon no men like wearing condoms. Iv never met any lads who will use condoms thats why most women are on birth control

OP posts:
HeidiUpTheMountain · 29/04/2023 18:51

Ionlydrinkondaysendinginy · 29/04/2023 18:48

Cmon no men like wearing condoms. Iv never met any lads who will use condoms thats why most women are on birth control

Show quote history

If they won’t use condoms, you don’t have sex with them. It’s not obligatory.

You have rights too, OP, even if you don’t think you deserve them.

BadNomad · 29/04/2023 18:53

Most men will wear a condom if they think there is a risk of pregnancy. A good man definitely will. You say your friend's dad is a good man. Well, see if he proves it.

waterlego · 29/04/2023 18:54

Iv never met any lads who will use condoms

Then you’ve only ever met useless, shitty men. It’s not your fault OP but you really need to raise your bar. 💐

YukoandHiro · 29/04/2023 18:55

Well this escalated

kitsuneghost · 29/04/2023 18:57

I am thinking maybe you should consider not having sex at all at the moment until you have sorted out your mental health
You are really not in a good place to be making these decisions
You are having to get sex advice from a pharmacy
You can't seem to accept men are using you.
You can't seem to say no sex without a condom.
You are taking MAP weeks after an abortion

please take time out for some self care

GoodChat · 29/04/2023 18:58

I need to be using condoms everytime (which obviously no man is gonna agree to)

Then don't have sex with them. They're putting you at huge risk.

Sakura7 · 29/04/2023 19:00

Using the pill as your only form of contraceptive is fine when you're in a relationship with a man you trust and when you know he has a clean bill of health.

It's not sufficient when you're having sex with multiple partners in a short space of time. It won't protect against STIs which is why you need a condom.

Every man I've been with has been happy to use them. I wouldn't accept anything less. You need to raise your standards here.

Sinamin · 29/04/2023 19:04

ReadersD1gest · 29/04/2023 18:11

I am past the age where this might be an issue but I didn't know this either, this information should be much more widely available!
I'm pretty sure the clinic will have covered all the issues with op, as they do with everyone.
Whether she took them on board is another matter entirely.

Ahh.

I had a load of fun when I was younger but never managed to end up in a situation like this.

Of course the abortion clinic would have explained, I'm sorry for saying something so stupid!

ReadersD1gest · 29/04/2023 19:08

Sinamin · 29/04/2023 19:04

Ahh.

I had a load of fun when I was younger but never managed to end up in a situation like this.

Of course the abortion clinic would have explained, I'm sorry for saying something so stupid!

Show quote history

God, sorry, I wasn't trying to make you feel stupid! Apologies if it sounded that way.