Page 6 | To think this is gender stereotyping?

angiec89 · 2023-04-27T07:28:46+00:00

Was talking with a friend a few days ago and she mentioned she was looking for a babysitter for her two kids this Saturday. I suggested DS as he's 16 and local (he could walk there and back), and she knows him well. He's done babysitting before for other friends and neighbours. My friend looked surprised and essentially said thanks but no thanks. I thought that seemed reasonable enough as her kids are quite young so maybe she wanted someone older. But no, instead she asked her neighbour's 14 year old daughter instead! AIBU to think this is because my son's a male?

nokidshere · 27/04/2023 11:58

If you want to change this, raise son’s better, call men and bous out on their behaviour and do not be blind or man pandering fool like this commenter.

How can it change though? Does me telling you that I have raised my sons to be good, kind, and safe people mean you would then let them babysit your young children? Assuming the answer is still no, how do they ever get past the stereotype?

NoFall · 27/04/2023 11:59

MakesMeFeelSad · 27/04/2023 11:55

Well if I'm to go by what I see at work day in day out they are more likely to be sexually abused by their father and killed by their mother than a random teen babysitter

But as a mum who hasn’t killed her children, with their father who hasn’t sexually abused them, I can reject an offer of babysitting from anyone, for any reason. If they’re offended, I have zero fucks to give.

Coffeeandbourbons · 27/04/2023 12:00

It won’t change. Men will always be a risk, sexually. It’s not ‘societal conditioning’ - you can’t ‘condition’ somebody to be attracted to minors any more than you can ‘condition’ somebody to be bisexual. It’s biological. We have to just mitigate the risk as thoroughly as we can weighing that up with the benefits of having involved fathers, family members and so on.

Deadpalm · 27/04/2023 12:02

onefinemess · 27/04/2023 10:30

Wow!

No wonder teenage boys are suffering with mental health issues.

Imagine being branded a child abuser and rapist just for existing!

Do you all view your fathers, brothers and husbands the same way?

Christ, that's just toxic.

What changes just because the boy isn't related to the children?

Can a teenage boy have any contact with his own siblings or is that now too dangerous?

What if you had two teenage boys, should they be kept apart incase they abuse each other?

Perhaps you'd all be happy to send your teenage sons to some sort of internment camp, to keep the rest of the children safe from their perverted desires.

Are you all really treating your sons like that?

What do you say to them?

At what point do you label them sexual predators?

Possibly the most disturbing thing I have read on here.

Or is it just other people's sons who are rapists, but not yours?

Amen.

It explains so much doesn't it

Naunet · 27/04/2023 12:08

onefinemess · 27/04/2023 10:30

Wow!

No wonder teenage boys are suffering with mental health issues.

Imagine being branded a child abuser and rapist just for existing!

Do you all view your fathers, brothers and husbands the same way?

Christ, that's just toxic.

What changes just because the boy isn't related to the children?

Can a teenage boy have any contact with his own siblings or is that now too dangerous?

What if you had two teenage boys, should they be kept apart incase they abuse each other?

Perhaps you'd all be happy to send your teenage sons to some sort of internment camp, to keep the rest of the children safe from their perverted desires.

Are you all really treating your sons like that?

What do you say to them?

At what point do you label them sexual predators?

Possibly the most disturbing thing I have read on here.

Or is it just other people's sons who are rapists, but not yours?

Maybe men should stop abusing kids then, women looking to safeguard their children are not the bad guys here.

Hellsmovie · 27/04/2023 12:11

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Absolutely. Just used the wrong term, I'll not use it again

Naunet · 27/04/2023 12:14

Do people not understand there’s a big difference between stereotypes and actual factual statistics?!

NotAnotherBathBomb · 27/04/2023 12:17

Hellsmovie · 27/04/2023 11:33

You've twisted it. I would say woman make up 98%-100% of that 8% that make false allegations. It's not all woman ,its not even alot of woman.but it is nearly always woman that make those false allegations

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Well, given that sexual offences make up the top 10 crimes committed in the UK, you’re far far safer with the risk of being falsely accused of rape 🥴

Phoebo · 27/04/2023 12:18

Interesting. My neice and her boyfriend are 20, he is a natural with my little boy and I'd prefer him if I had to choose

Hellsmovie · 27/04/2023 12:20

NotAnotherBathBomb · 27/04/2023 12:17

Well, given that sexual offences make up the top 10 crimes committed in the UK, you’re far far safer with the risk of being falsely accused of rape 🥴

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I dont dispute that.

Naunet · 27/04/2023 12:22

SleepDreamThinkHuge · 27/04/2023 11:46

If men are not given the opportunity to do these roles how are they supposed to break gender stereotypical roles? I do feel sorry for some men. From experience, I have seen men who had to leave jobs in female dominated jobs like childcare and primary school teaching they were also questioned "why does he want to work with children he must be a wrongun."

It’s not a stereotype, it’s a statistical fact, men can fix this by not abusing kids. What we don’t do, is remove safeguarding to put children at risk in order to give men a chance to prove themselves 🙄

Naunet · 27/04/2023 12:23

Hellsmovie · 27/04/2023 12:20

I dont dispute that.

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Where’s your evidence that 98%-100% of false claims are made by women? Is that you just taking a guess or do you have evidence to back this up?

Nicecow · 27/04/2023 12:28

It's quite sad that many people seem to view men as sinister. No wonder there is such a lack of much needed male role models for young boys and girls. Also if men view women as stupid we can't really complain, it's much less offensive than how they're viewed it seems

NotAnotherBathBomb · 27/04/2023 12:28

Shirls2 · 27/04/2023 11:58

Indeed! My mother (after being appalled by the news about yet another woman being killed or attacked by a man) bought me and all my sisters a rape alarm a year or so ago. To be honest, I only ever think to grab hold of mine in my handbag if there is a man walking behind me at night/in the evening/in a quieter street. Never when it’s a woman. I know: it’s awful as it’s more than likely a decent man but I’m just being honest.

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After Sabeena Nessa was murdered walking through a park near where we live my friend and I always call each other when we’re waking anywhere remotely isolated (including the car park behind my block of flats) after sunset 🫤 I’d be interested to know if the offended man in this thread has ever felt the need to call a friend when walking alone.

OhMerde · 27/04/2023 12:29

NotAnotherBathBomb · 27/04/2023 11:26

Yes? Where have you been living 😂

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It was a statement, not a question.

Meceme · 27/04/2023 12:36

Nicecow · 27/04/2023 12:28

It's quite sad that many people seem to view men as sinister. No wonder there is such a lack of much needed male role models for young boys and girls. Also if men view women as stupid we can't really complain, it's much less offensive than how they're viewed it seems

It's really not. There is no statistical evidence that 98% of stupid people are women, its probably 50/50.
There is, however, statistical evidence that 98% of sexual assaults are committed by men .... that does not mean that 98% of men are sexual abusers, most men are not but because they do not have 'abuser' tattooed on their foreheads we have to be careful.
That's basic safeguarding.

OhMerde · 27/04/2023 12:37

Bimbom · 27/04/2023 11:50

Is it just me that gets serious incel vibes from any man who describes women as "females"

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Yep, abs

Skybluepinky · 27/04/2023 12:37

Has yr son got an enhanced DBS?

OhMerde · 27/04/2023 12:37

Christ almighty, my phone today is driving me nuts...

Yes, absolutely.

arethereanyleftatall · 27/04/2023 12:39

@onefinemess - terrible post.
Do you people really put the hurt feelings of boys above the safety of girls?!? Crikey. 98% of assault is committed by males, direct your ire towards what can be done to stop men committing crimes, rather than towards parents of girls who are just protecting their daughters.

MakeMineADouble81 · 27/04/2023 12:41

Moomoola · 27/04/2023 10:39

Wow, utterly shocked that people assume rapist etc! He knows the children, has experience, is 16. He sounds absolutely fine to me. It could be any reason at all, may even be that the other girl wants less money/ is friends with the mum, who knows? The above pp puts it better than I can. Do we really live in such a hateful society?

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As a mother to 4 young boys I am also shocked and saddened to see the majority of people's reactions to the idea of a teenage male babysitter.

Sarah2891 · 27/04/2023 12:41

I wouldn't leave a kid with a 16 year old boy, sorry.

Shirls2 · 27/04/2023 12:42

Nicecow · 27/04/2023 12:28

It's quite sad that many people seem to view men as sinister. No wonder there is such a lack of much needed male role models for young boys and girls. Also if men view women as stupid we can't really complain, it's much less offensive than how they're viewed it seems

But being cautious about men (because of the actions of some men) isn’t something plucked from thin air - it’s based upon statistics.

As far as I’m aware, there aren’t similarly shocking statistics about women being thick.

ErrolTheDragon · 27/04/2023 12:45

Is it just me that gets serious incel vibes from any man who describes women as "females"
More Ferengi, tbh..
But not so much nowadays, in a thread where sex matters.

Squiblet · 27/04/2023 12:46

I've had a lad from down the road look after my DCs many times. He's about 17 now but we've known him and his family since he was eight.

If I'd overlooked him in favour of hiring solely teen girl babysitters, what message would that be sending to my own son? Boys are bad .... boys can't be trusted ... boys are irresponsible ... boys can't care for children properly, not like girls can ...

These are not ideas that young boys should be internalising.