Made in Chelsea blokes - twins via surrogate

[HermioneKipper]

More “celebs” commissioning a woman’s body to buy a baby.

When is this going to be made illegal 😡

And twins again. So many of them have twins. I think I get a bit triggered by this especially as I have twins and know how dangerous twin pregnancy can be for both mother and babies. And what it does to a woman’s body. No one could consent to this.

Had to switch off Giovanna Fletcher and her simpering podcast when they started talking about “their” miscarriages. Horrific amounts of bleeding, pain and horrendous wrenching emotional pain for you was it mates? No, didn’t think so.

I mean come on they're not comparable. Wtf do you want the state to do with children who are unable to be cared for by their parents?

It's not ideal at all but unfortunately unfit parents are free to breed.

Surrogacy is a deliberate process. I don't feel as strongly about it as others on this post but it's common sense

I know someone who was a surrogate entirely out of the goodness of her heart.

she’s a married middle class woman with 2 healthy children of her own. She had always wanted to be a surrogate so she did it once with the full support of her husband. The baby was not biologically hers, she wanted to do it purely to give someone the gift of a child. No money exchanged hands.

@MonsterChopz and @thebellagio .. @Tygertiger puts it well.. worth reading their post as it is more succinct than mine.

Adoption is used as a final resort when a child's own parent is unable to care for them, all other avenues such as keeping children with other members of their birth families, are explored and discounted. The 'primal wound' of removing a child from it's mother, to whom it is biologically and neurologically attached, is suffered by the adopted person and interferes with neurological developments that happens during pregnancy and in the days and weeks after birth.

With surrogacy, that 'primal wound' is deliberately inflicted on the child by consenting adults, including those who will be responsible for their care and close contact for the entirety of their childhood lives.

The child cannot consent and is not being saved from a situation that was deemed to have been worse, in the case of adoption, or in the case of the death of a mother, was unavoidable.

The difference between surrogacy and other forms of separation due to adoption, death or incapacity of the mother, etc, is that surrogacy is a choice to deliberately inflict this trauma on a child to meet the needs of the adults around them.

Were you one of those people who said “tough shit” about lesbians having rights to marry or letting gay men adopt? Because that used to be a common thing
Yes I think op feels like only heterosexual couples who can naturally conceive should have children and gay people should only adopt.
And I think ivf IS allowed but not in the case of surrogacy coz, thought shit 🤷‍♀️

I would seriously consider it. And yes I’ve had a child.

The donor egg question is also very interesting. Sometimes that’s not allowed either. Unless the poster has done it in which case it’s fine 😂

This 100%

commercial surrogacy isn’t a good thing for the female sex is it. Just another form of prostitution, renting out the reproductive organs. It’s not the kind of job anyone would want for their own daughter. It reduces women to bodies used to breed from, like farm animals.

The 'primal wound' of removing a child from it's mother, to whom it is biologically and neurologically attached, is suffered by the adopted person and interferes with neurological developments that happens during pregnancy and in the days and weeks after birth.

And this is the case for every adopted person? They have all suffered and are..damaged?

I don’t understand how you can say that a baby is not ‘biological’ to the surrogate. It might not have been created using the surrogate’s egg, but it’s entire body has been made by her body. How is that not ‘biological’?

Well you weren’t listening very well were you.

As single egg transfer is recommended because more than one egg could mean more than one baby. The twins you’re talking about occur from two or more eggs being put back.

Identical twins come from one egg and occur naturally and very rarely. (A tiny percentage more commonly in IVF. TINY though)

Non id twins are much more common

The donor egg question is also very interesting. Sometimes that’s not allowed either. Unless the poster has done it in which case it’s fine
I was thinking about this too. Who is allowed to do this one?

Exactly!

And cells from the mother and baby pass from one to the other via the placenta.

Mothers have the cells of their grown children inside them until the day they die

Yes.

Have you done any reading on the topic at all?

I really dislike Ollie. He comes across as pompous and arrogant.

I’m also not a fan of surrogacy. Pregnancy places a huge toll on your body and being pregnant and giving birth can see complications.

And? It is also genetically the baby of the parent.

@waterlego

The baby is not biologically the surrogates.

Once the baby is born that is it.

Women choose to do this.

Haha no.

crazy maybe 🤔 Sent that way via toddler twins 🤯 🤣

Exclusive - absolutely not. Twin parents are amazing

And this is the case for every adopted person? They have all suffered and are..damaged?
Yes.
Oh wow..ok..

Have you done any reading on the topic at all?

I am very close with a couple of people who have been adopted. I just didn't know they are damaged. I dont think they know either..

The fact they have made every viable pregnancy public knowledge from early days doesn’t sit easy with me and the way they have gone through ‘their loss’ publicly doesn’t feel right. Especially as they’ve never acknowledged the surrogates pain.

That said they both obviously want to be parents and have found a surrogate to help them. I’m sure they will make great parents but they seem to be very quick to erase the surrogate’s involvement and her importance which feels very wrong.

It’s actually very difficult to put in two embryos in this country. It is strongly advised against and only happens if the eggs are from an older woman (very specific age) or poor quality.

Totally agree OP.
The baby should be able to stay with its mother by default.

Once the baby is born ‘that’s it’?

Disagree.

The mother (surrogate) is likely to carry some of that baby’s DNA in her body forever.

How do you think the embryo becomes a live baby? You don’t think that’s a biological process that happened in the mother’s body?

More than one online dictionary disagree with your definition.