It's a nasty neighbour one with diagram!

[bathroomwindowargh]

So much of this is tedious backstory, but better to contextualise and not drip feed, so here we go. Also I’d prob be wise to change details but on the other hand I can barely get my head round it myself so this is all straight facts. Name changed though!
We live in a weird house, and when I moved in with now DH 15 years ago, as part of a revamp we built a new bathroom in part of the existing garage, bathroom had no window. The back wall of our house and garage and therefore the outer wall of the bathroom is a wall in someone else’s garden. I know I’m gonna have to add a diagram and I will!
The someone else was an elderly neighbour who I really loved and visited a lot, but she died a couple of years ago, and the house was empty for a bit.
This just happened to coincide with us re-doing the bathroom and DH thought it was a chance to put a window in. He didn’t put one in first time round because we asked elderly neighbour’s late DH and he said no, so fair enough we didn’t push it. But this time DH thought the timing meant he could get away with it. I was a bit unsure but he basically just went ahead.
In the process he a) informed the son of late elderly woman that window was happening and could he please tell any buyers.
b) informed the estate agents to please tell any buyers.
c) got planning permission.

Basically he kept in touch with son and EA so we thought all good. Window finished. New neighbours moved in. A couple in their 30s, new to the village (yes we live in a village, so it's rural). The bloke hit the roof at the window, and claims no one told him, but we have our suspicions that he might be telling porkies.
Now the window cannot be seen at all from their house (I know this for a fact because I spent plenty time in their house visiting elderly friend, and I’m well aware what parts of the garden are visible from the house and what are not). This wall is not. It’s not a large window it’s a wide but shallow window from top to bottom window and the glass is not remotely see through, proper obscured glass. But the bloke hates it and is obviously very pissed off.
I have some sympathy for this to be honest, I did think DH was chancing it building the window while the house was empty, even though he played it all by the book.

Now to the meat. Since they moved in bloke and DH are at loggerheads but managing to be sort of surface polite, bloke came round and discussed it with DH and DH agreed to a window limiter so window would only open a couple of inches. Not happy but agreed. I was away so I haven’t met them.
However – DH says bloke was subtly threatening and bullying, and since we agreed to window limiter bloke has put both a shed overlapping one end of the window, a trellis right up almost touching and – worst and most aggressive – a piece of wood against the outside of the window so that effectively we can’t open it all all, not even a centimetre. DH very upset. It does feel like a bullying act of aggression, especially given we agreed to limit the window from our side, and it means we can’t clean the outside of the window by opening it and with the trellis etc DH thinks it’s going to get quickly fouled up with trapped leaves.
Meanwhile the pretence at being civilised carries on apace and DH, who bumps into the bloke fairly regularly (I never seem to see them but I’m away a lot) has invited them both round for coffee and to see the bathroom, to which they’ve just replied they’ll get back to us with times.
DH wants civility to prevail and wants me to re-open the question of a window limiter and could he please kindly remove his fucking aggressive stick from our window (my words, I’m getting angry writing this).

My problem is I’m a post-menopausal harpy and I feel only capable of two modes with this. 1. Play dumb and nice but not get involved. 2. Give it to bloke with all barrels, tell him what I think of his piece of wood and call him out for bullying DH. DH is a totally non-macho pussycat by the way and probably mildly autistic, hence walking into this by blithely building his bloody window.
I could do without ANY of it! By the way there are no other windows on the back of our house except three roof skylights in the upstairs living room.

Help – what should I do? I’ve been putting off even thinking about it but it’s now upon us – the civilised visit – and I’m going to have to meet these people and say something. But what? AIBU to want to fight the bully?
Sorry so long. Really didn’t want to drip feed.

Window finished. New neighbours moved in

You got planning permission. If he didn't own the house his lawyers should have picked up the planning request. If the window was already completed then he shouldn't have bought the house if it bothered him that much.

I understand he might not be thrilled but he shouldn't be aggressive.

Honestly, planning permission is immaterial. He can just entirely block the window if it’s on the boundary so you get no light at all. If I were you, I would try to negotiate.

Also, your diagram suggests the window is only slightly overlapping his garden. Is that the case? What's behind his garden?

You need to save up and get a sash window

Can you put a fan in another wall and keep the window shut. Personally I’d suck up the cost and put an inward opening window. We’ve just replaced a window in a tiled bathroom and it didn’t damage the tiles, maybe they can change the opening within the frame.

Inward opening window.

And you can't see out?

He's definitely being a dick. However, so was your husband.

But caveat emptor and all that. Why did he buy the house? Tell him he should blame his lawyer for not pointing it out. Or himself for not spotting it when he viewed.

Our bathroom window is in a pretty similar position and we haven't had any complaints, so I'm not really understanding the fuss here...

I would change out the window to a tilt and turn inward opening one. Then you can clean it and open it without any problem. They can probably swop it out and not damage the tiles and will only cost a few hundred. Worth it for years of less hassle!!

Your diagram is weird, but maybe your house is weird.

Your window as drawn is half in your neighbours garden, and half out.

So why don't you simply move it further down the diagram so it is all out of your neighbours garden ?

I don't know the law and your deeds, but my guess is that your neighbour can block the light to your window (with things placed on his land if he wishes - he could put a shed there if he wants). You probably can't open your window onto his land and I doubt whether he can attach things to your wall legally either.

To be honest I think you are both unreasonable. You for chancing it and him for objecting to it. But I would be wary of pissing him off. He might decide to site a huge smelly compost heap right at the bottom of his garden, miles away from his house and right next to your window. Then you really won't want to open it.

What I’m not understanding is; from your diagram, it seems the window is half inside his garden and half out of the boundary. How on earth would it have opened anyway? I’m assuming there would be a fence or wall there or something?

I am curious to know why you put the window in in that position?
It could have been further along and not partially in his garden. or at the side of your house.

Unfortunately, if I owned your neighbour's garden that corner is where I would put a shed as well.

When you open the window, you are trespassing over his property. Of course he's pissed off. You have no right to do that.

You'll just have to move house

You absolutely can't open a window over someone else's land. A planning application to build a 2 storey house was recently refused in our village because the windows would open over a the tarmac area outside the neighbouring business premises.
I'm surprised that you got PP.

When you open the window, you are trespassing over his property.

OP said it opens inwards.

I really weirdly have the exact perspective of the neighbour, as in my last house my elderly neighbour asked for planning permission for an extension into their garden to live in because they couldn’t make it upstairs anymore. I said yes.

The gardens connected. When the extension was built I noticed that there was a window on the side facing my garden, but just a little bathroom one identical to how you described. Obscured and on a latch. Turns out this was where his bathroom was in the extension.

To be honest with you, I was upset. Nobody wants a window into their garden, but especially not a bathroom one.

However YANBU, there’s no need for neighbour to be rude and it’s done now. Personally I didn’t put a trellis up as I didn’t want to block any light going in. What I will say is that it is horrid hearing someone on the loo when the kids are playing in the back garden, so be wary that the sound travels. Best of luck!

No she didn't

He could build a wall on his property and block it if he got planning permission

How tall do you think garden fences are?

You said it yourself dh pushed his luck and put it in while house was unoccupied. I would have thought if previous neighbours had said no then likelihood of new neighbours saying it would have been the same. They essentially will feel awkward using that area of their garden. Yabu imo.

I'm sure I've read this exact thread before.

Did the buyer of the other house not view the bottom of the garden before buying the house?
How did they not notice there was a window in their garden wall?

The house was empty when he first applied for planning, so the change happened between viewing and sale by the sounds of things.

Firstly the planning permission would have been flagged up in the searches and the solicitors would have had to notify them. Whether putting the window in when you knew their would be little to no objection is morally right is another matter. But it is done now.
I can understand both points of view imagine moving into a house and suddenly you got a new window onto your garden - nobody likes the idea of being overlooked even if it is frosted glass, you still notice it don't you.
But I would never deny someone some light in what would otherwise be a window less room.
I wouldn't go in all guns blazing when they turn up but I would be very firm, if you concede to this what next ?
The next is the thing you need to worry about.
But remember you have to live next to these people and sometimes its nice to be able to open a bathroom window.
Tell them the The limiter is a comprise and that is the end of it.
Goodluck

You don't need to replace the entire window - the fitter might be able to change the hinges.

You are technically trespassing every time you open the window onto his land. But he is being a bit of a dick about it considering it's at the end of the garden and so far from his house.

Did the planning permission allow for it to be outward opening?