Older men expecting you to move

[Miloticc]

…And getting furious when you don’t??
Is it just me? Men keep getting really angry at me when I won’t move out the way or let them into traffic, etc. A few examples:

This morning I didn’t let an older gentleman in a Range Rover filter into traffic from a junction, because the car behind me was already yielding for him. He was beeping, swearing and flashing his lights like crazy at me 😳

The other day an older man in a van tried to force his way in front of me in a lane merge (when there was no gap in front of me and no cars behind me) and was absolutely seething that I didn’t just stop and let him do it.

I had a man in about his 60’s (not old by any means, so capable of waiting with the rest of us) try and step in front of me in a bus queue and was livid when I wouldn’t make space for him and he had to go to the back. He actually shoved me.

When I walk down the street everyone kind of weaves around each other but I’ve noticed men that are older than me (I’m in my 30’s) will try and walk right through me, expecting me to jump out their way.

Obviously not all men, but enough that I’m really noticing it. More so now than when I was in my early 20’s! They stay calm if they get their own way, but if I dare to stand my ground they go from 0-100

YABU - Just move and let them get on with it
YANBU - It shouldn’t make them so angry

I've honestly never noticed this.

Is it to do with stature? I'm 5'10 and wondering if that makes a difference.

Alive and present in south Wales, alas.

Of course there are rude people of all ages and genders, what a deliberately obtuse point some people are trying to push home - the OP is specifically talking about older men who behave like this and clearly other posters, including me, have experienced it too.

The Rangey and van thing - that's more the vehicle than the age/sex of the driver I think.
When I've been walking in a crowd I can pretty much sense which man person will try to barge thru me. I stop and plant at that point.

It gets better. I'm 70 and I find young men in particular are very helpful and friendly. Maybe they all love their grannies.

At school drop off it's more likely to be women driving, so any drivers who are being aggressive, parking badly or otherwise being shit are more likely to be women.

As someone who is a fair bit (6") shorter and who wears flat shoes, yup, I think part of it might be a height thing.

So women are only valid in terms of their relations to their male relatives. How very handmaid's tale.

Every day I thank my lucky stars that I live in a country with a more enlightened attitude to women than about 80% of the globe.

Back on topic, male runners are the worst for this sort of path hogging, refusal to share space behaviour.

When driving it's all ages and genders but mostly white van man who is much younger. The worse was some younger woman about 1.30pm who practically had a stroke when I gave way to bus. Her her was bouncing up and down and her arms was flying all over the shop. She overtook me then 200m metres ahead was in front me at at red light. I was surprised she didn't get out and kick it down. Stupid human. Rushing for her aneurism I think. The trick is blow them a kiss or just never look back. I don't get much road rage incidents, I never make eye contact. Unless you was indeed that person with the bus who I enjoyed laughing at the lights. Boil her piss some more

As pedestrians, young men are the worst. Entitled to look at their phones and walk through anyone already on the pavement.

Old men driving - yes, tae fuck with the lot of them. Don't wag your fucking finger at me, you old bastard. Don't flash your lights. Drive your own fucking car. And you in the old green Jag, don't think you can push in front of me in a traffic queue. I don't have to give way to you because you are a man. Take your penis and roll it and stuff it you know where. And you can stay behind me, driving at the speed limit, to the end of the lane. You can.

Tailgating? I love it. Brake little and often, and watch their blood pressure rise.

Yep - I get a lot of willy waving, from nob heads with no nobs when I'm driving my Porsche.

Apparently little old ladies aren't allowed to overtake men.

It's high school kids who barge me out the way on the pavements. They walk in gangs and never move for anyone. I agree with pp - the girls are much worse than the boys.

I relate to a lot of the examples here on pavements etc. Patriarchy Chicken gave me a giggle, started playing that when I was younger and newly moved to London.

But what I’m mostly experiencing now is that the ‘rudeness spectrum’ seems to have got so much broader since covid. To the point that people seem to have got polarised and I can’t attribute rudenesses to particular demographics anymore. When I’m out and about now I seem to meet more friendliness AND more rudeness from strangers than before covid.

Could being restricted to our local vicinity have made some people more aware of passers by and appreciate non transactional interactions more than before? More like it was before social media?

Have driven a variety of girly cars, all convertible... majority of angry drivers have been female and can't think of any unpleasant incidents with older men ever. Might it have something to do with location? I'm Home Counties, never noticed much sexism ever tbh, and what I have encountered has come from younger guys. Though maybe I'm just oblivious!

If you’re walking and want / need people to move out of your way for medical reasons or whatever I’d wear a mask.
These days it’s amazing how people give you a wide birth as they think you have covid.

It’s like the parting of the waves when we re in a supermarket.
Ps. We don’t wear a mask for this reason or indeed because we have covid.

There shouldn’t be space for anyone to ‘undertake’ you. You should be driving on the left unless you’re overtaking.

if people are undertaking you they’re making a point that you are needlessly hogging two lanes @DrPrunesquallor and that is illegal.

Ido wonder how many of these complaints from folk about ‘exasperated drivers’ are from people blithely tootling along, selfishly hogging lanes and blocking junctions with no concept that they’re actually driving very poorly.

Tried Patriarchy Chicken a couple of times and it hurt. Men don't seem to mind shoulder barging small women, do they.

A few years ago now, I took an elderly friend into town. She's well under five foot, quite frail and she was hanging onto my arm to steady herself as we walked. Several times, young men went to walk right into us before realising that they were about to barge a frail old lady and her middle-aged companion and then they suddenly swerved out of the way.

Ido wonder how many of these complaints from folk about ‘exasperated drivers’ are from people blithely tootling along, selfishly hogging lanes and blocking junctions with no concept that they’re actually driving very poorly.

Nice try.

(have not RTFT and will do but i must get this off my chest)

The other day an older man in a van tried to force his way in front of me in a lane merge (when there was no gap in front of me and no cars behind me) and was absolutely seething that I didn’t just stop and let him do it.

it gives me the ABSOLUTE RAGE. You are supposed to adjust your speed coming onto the motorway, and if there is nothing behind you, it is perfectly reasonable that they go behind you.

I live in AUDI/BMW/Merc land. They just simply cannot go behind another car if they can force their way in front. It is simply not possible. Physics or something.
(merging: if slow moving traffic you should go all the way to the end of the filter lane then go in. Non slow moving? go in where it is safe to do so)

Just broke my own resolution. Hugged the wall to allow women walking two abreast with buggies pass me.

I can relate from my own twin buggy pushing days. No acknowledgement.

Just curious, so do you ever experience this with women?

Just wondering, given the outrage and NAMALT on here.

I've seen the same attitude from female joggers . Especially on south bank .

It's not exclusive to men

Mmmm, I'm a female jogger and make a big effort to get out of people's way. Mainly because they don't need my huffing, sweaty self all up in their personal space!

But I take your point. The most unreasonable runner I ever encountered was on the South Bank. I was walking slowly with my elderly dad. This runner dude ran right up behind us and instead of circumventing or saying excuse me, he CLAPPED HIS HANDS at us in a signal (I presume) to get out of the way 😂

I have definitely experienced this and I am not a woman. I imagine it's even worse if you're a woman.

Good point. My DH is 6 foot 2. He is fine on pavements, but is constantly lamenting boomers and their driving.

Itself it happens to you too and your a male, why would it be worse if your a female. Arsholes are arsholes to everyone