If you gifted money to your grandchildren...

[HarperElla]

...say £50-£150 per birthday/Christmas and the odd other occasion like Easter or random gifts, would you mind if their mother put the money towards a holiday for them and their parent? I've been doing this, I have a 4 year old, he has too many toys, I have a really good savings pot for him already etc etc. I want to take him on holiday to Egypt before he goes to school, and put any money which is given to him by family members towards this. I've made sure that it doesn't extend past the fare for his flight. I've been told by a family member that I'm out of order doing this and that I should either put it in his savings or buy him gifts with it. I've made it clear to him that the family members who gave us the money helped us pay for it and that we should be grateful to them that they helped us go on holiday (explained in terms he can ubderstand). He has 4k in savings, 1k a year put in my me. WIBU to do this?

Agreed! I took my son to Egypt when he was four - he's 22 now, but he still remembers the day we went to the museum in Cairo. Whilst he was very impressed with Tutenkhamun's death mask, his most favourite part was one of the security guards lifting him over the barrier so that he could get up close and personal with a mummified crocodile. He also remembers clambering up one of the pyramids at Giza.

If you're saving £1k a year for him, why not take a break from doing that to pay for the Egypt trip? Works out the same, but isn't using his birthday money.

I’m shocked at the number of people saying yabu. In my family money given to a child on their birthday/Christmas is to be spent on something for them such as toys/clothes or whatever they need. No one, including myself if I were the giver, would bat an eyelid about it going towards a holiday - it’s a nice experience to spend it on rather than more “stuff” they don’t need.

I suppose I might be querying the safety of Cairo and also how much a 4 year old would get out of a week schlepping around pyramids in searing heat.
But others here have said they did it at 4 so I might be being unreasonable about that.
I think it's also more money - although I know the Legoland hotel is super expensive as well.

YANBU! Use the money, book the holiday, enjoy every minute! Travel is hugely enriching for children, the money is buying him an experience. We have a decent amount saved for our young DC (a good chunk of which has been gifted to them). We intend to use it towards extending our home. They will benefit hugely from having the extra space.

I personally wouldn’t be bothered if money I gifted went towards a family holiday. It’s still Al lovely present being able to contribute to a nice experience for an Egypt crazy little boy. Unless it was a large sum of money which would be better in savings. But smaller amounts when the child already has all the clothes a toys he needs is surely fine.

slightly different but me and my toddler (and partner) are off to centre parcs and my toddler had around £100 left of her Christmas money which we have put to one side as her spending money for the holiday (that damn on site toys shop she can spot from miles away. And that sweet shop next door!)

i think yu should tell the gps what the money is intended for not just save it up and book a holiday when they think its going on toys or savings

My family would be pleased if they helped pay for the kids on holiday. I can't afford to take them otherwise. Maybe ask people what they'd like you to put it towards? Like I said mine would be really pleased with it but everyone is different

Absolutely this.

Well, I spoke to my mum (and showed her this thread) and her response was that she thinks it's a good way for me to spend whatever money she's gifted. She knows how Egypt obsessed he is and was actually a bit emotional at the idea of him standing in front of the pyramids and the 'phinx' (she's an artist and painted his wardrobe for him with heiroglyphics and pyramids, ancient Egypt stuff etc so knows how much he loves it), and was happy she had contributed to it. She also said she was happy I didn't spend it on toys and said exactly what I said re him inheriting a big chunk of money from his great grandparents which he will get when he turns 18. She's happy we are going on holiday and has offered to give me some spending money for him when we go (as long as we bring her back a gift!) - I've told her she doesn't have to do this. She also said that she wants to make a little book for him to tell him where his first ever holiday is going to be (she did this for me and my siblings whenever we went on holiday when we were little, I've still got them!) and wants to be there when he gets it. She was definitely surprised that I even considered this wouldn't be OK, so safe to say she's on board.

I'm quite surprised at the number of posters saying YABU!

I'd much rather money I gifted to a child go towards a holiday than some toys or clothes!

Holidaying with kids is expensive!

DH & I could do a v v v cheap holiday abroad but with 2 kids it's coming to over 3k!

We aren't using gifted money for it, but if finances were tight, I wouldn't think twice about using it to put towards the kids' tickets if we needed to.

I think it's a great idea, a million times better than toys and plastic tat. I'm happy your mum is being supportive about it. Hope you both have a great time!

Don't rely on ggparents inheritance for your ds, who's to say they won't need it for care home/ nursing costs?

I don't think you should use money gifted to your child for a holiday. It should go into the bank for him. You need to take the money from your house finances and put a little less into savings for your DC. We also save £1000 a year for each child, they tend to get about £500 a year from family so I only put in £500. I understand your thinking but when you gift money to a child you do intend it to go to them.

You are just rearranging words!
You are putting the money from you in his account and using the grandparents money on holiday. Take your money out of his savings and put theirs in. Or use theirs. No different!
Egypt sounds lovely and a lovely treat if you can afford it but your child won't remember this holiday when older.

she's an artist and painted his wardrobe for him with heiroglyphics and pyramids, ancient Egypt stuff etc

That is lovely! Have a fantastic holiday.

You're mum sounds brilliant ❤️

I'd think it off if you were using his money buying items for yourself, but with this I don't see any issue. You're buying him clothes and toys throughout the year, so it's swings and roundabouts really.

Still doesn’t make it your holiday fund.

If you are putting in 1k a year into his savings then just put less in next time. It will even itself out. Holidays should be the responsibility of the parent to pay for. Any money gifts to our children are put into savings for them as that's what is expected by the givers in our case. We usually allow £20/30 to be spent on their choice of toys but the rest is saved.

YANBU, I think it’s a great way to spend the money! Much better than the usual truck loads of plastic shite that they get at that age. Travel is amazing for little ones even at 4! Go for it! ❤️

I think it is fine op, i don't think it's cheeky but then I know my parent (DC's grandparents) wouldn't mind.
Why not just take the £1k you put in savings for him and replace it with the money from friends and family and that way you are saving it for him.

I wouldn't as i think they'll need every penny they can get when they are older, but if you are doing it you should ask the money giver first if they mind.

This wouldn't bother me at all. I'm glad your mum is on board, have a lovely holiday

@Abacusporttaco if the OP's son would get more enjoyment from the holiday than random toys would you still tell OP to buy gifts. The family member who has said it was wrong has said it should either be put in savings or spent on gifts, the gift is a trip to Egypt