To be in tears over my nose?

[TheLostNights]

I never let anyone take photos of me as I am a very ugly woman. But the thing that bothers me most is my nose. It is very long and pointy. DH took a photo of one of the kids the other day and my side profile is in it and my nose just looked horrific.
Perhaps foolishly, I googled ways to minimise it naturally like with make up etc but came across an article about a man with the world's longest nose. His was 8CM. Or just over. Measured mine just now from top to the bottom and it's just over 7CM. Which now makes me feel even worse. DH started shouting at me saying it's getting like an obsession but I just hate how freak like it makes me look. Everyone else looks beautiful or at least normal. I hate the fact that unless I have a nose job (which I can't afford ) then I am stuck looking like this.

Oh, I though that comment was a general advice for people struggling…

If no one in your life ever says anything nice to you there's something wrong there.

Well obviously.
It’s been like this my entire life.
I’ve literally had one compliment in my entire life and with was from a pharmacist who liked my mittens!
That’s it. And reason why I remember it is because it’s the only nice thing anyone has ever said to me.
It was about fucking mittens! How sad!
Now can people understand what life actually looks like as an actually ugly woman?

Do you smile much? A friendly personality is so attractive.

That's very sad. To be honest though you've been let down and I'd hope that wouldn't happen today because at the very least these days your teachers would be building your confidence about your skills and strengths, and not over emphasising your looks.
I don't tend to focus on looks with my compliments consciously for both males and females. I mean, I'll say something nice about a hair change or clothes or something but I like to let people know other strengths, like when they are good with my kids or good at staying calm in a stressful situation, good listeners, achievements in hobbies that kind of thing.
I know you probably don't want to hear it but if you join a hobby group that's not focused on looks you'll get support and confidence building on non looks things.

Yes.

I think you mix with twunts.

This is so interesting and I agree that things are often not noticeable to others.

my first partner had a huge nose. Very large. I didn’t notice. One night his friends were teasing him and he was joking along and only then did I notice but even then not anything very unusual. He also had a complex about being short and I had not noticed that either. I thought he was gorgeous. Anyway we had a child and he has a large nose. I know he doesn’t like his photo taken in profile but apart from that I think he’s ok with it. I think a large nose is attractive. But I totally understand the unhappiness caused when we don’t like our appearance. It’s soul destroying.

Why do you care so much? I’m not being funny but you’ve clearly had sex as you’re married with kids. Therefore clearly there has been occasions where you lose your inhibitions about your features and they don’t matter?

If you felt that insecure, you wouldn’t have sex to begin with, heck you might not even dare to have children if you hate your features that much? You’ve already surpassed that and put your thoughts aside at certain points in your life. You can continue to do this.

What does being more attractive help you out with at this stage of your life, when you have already settled down?

I think one thing you fail to realise is that the grass isn’t always greener. I am pretty. I have women that automatically hate me for it and leave me out. I have men that assume any friendship with them must end in a shag. I’m not in a particularly impressive situation in life either. Having a few compliments or cars honking at you isn’t the end-game you think it is.

@OhVicIveFallen no it's quite big also upturned. it's all in the eye of the beholder. god you try to help 🙄

Never mind plastic surgery on a nose, you've clearly had an empathy bypass.

I'm physically attractive and have loads of friends both sexes. I know loads of stunners who are popular too. So I can't understand your problem?
Maybe it depends where you live?

A strong nose on a woman is very attractive IMO. Not everybody needs to be a Barbie.

I have a long, thin nose too OP and had some horrid comments as a kid such as being called "concorde" "big bird" "pinocchio" etc. Like you, i hate sideways pics too but have come to an acceptance that this is the only nose that I have and I don't have the money to change it so try my best to not feel defined by it. Its just 1 part of everything that makes me me.
In my opinion, mine looks worse with a middle parting, if my hair gets too long, if i lose weight off my face etc so is this something fairly easily you could look at? Even a bit of highlighter on my cheekbones help distract from it.
Big hugs to you x

I second the fringe idea. Despite getting money made smaller my profile is still not balanced but a heavy fringe helps bring my forehead forward and improves my profile I think.

*mine

I am going to change back to a side fringe. I don't know if it looks dated but if it helps hide how long my nose is somewhat then it will help.
Am going to speak with DH when he is in a better mood about having a nose job however. I know some people said their measurements were similar to mine but I keep thinking of those comments I got at the beginning of my thread. People were genuinely shocked and I know you get trolls here but it really did make me realise and confirmed things for me.

Speaking as somebody who had a nose job in my twenties, I’ve discovered there are two types of people who don’t like their nose. I joined lots of FB groups about it and you still see it. There’s the ones who see an imperfection and ask people on there what they’d do. They dislike their nose and recognise that it could be made better but it’s very much about improving their look. These are the people who I believe would probably simply move on to the next thing if they fixed their nose, because they are looking for perfection.

Then there is the person like me who spent every waking moment in turmoil and could think of nothing else. I would spend hours in the mirror looking at it from different angles, I would become very depressed and get upset. I would avoid social occasions, I’d get distressed if anyone had a camera out and I would dread the inevitable photos afterwards. I even used to wish that I would be in an accident and my nose disfigured, because I felt that I could explain that to people, whereas making peace with the fact that my natural nose was so hideous was just horrific. I even had counselling about it, hoping that would work, but it didn’t.
I knew that I had other parts of me that weren’t perfect, but even then I didn’t care about those. I was under no illusions about becoming a beauty queen or looking perfect, but I just wanted a nose that fitted my face.

When I had my nose job, my whole life changed. It’s not perfect by any means and I’ve actually got different sized nostrils and they told me that the structure of my nose is like two different half noses stuck together, which I’m guessing is just down to genetics. To fix that would have involved taking bone from other places and would have been a far more complex job. But the ugly bump is gone and I had a nice little upturn done. My nose suits my face but it’s still got the character of being slightly imperfect if you look hard enough. I just wish I’d got it done sooner. I’ve never moved on to wanting anything else done, like people said I would.
So if you think you fall into my category, honestly just get it booked and do it. Recovery was so easy, I felt absolutely fine as soon as I woke up from surgery and had zero pain and I could breathe through it by day 5.

I have no idea about nose size so can’t comment if yours sounds big but just to say I find large noses interesting/attractive. I’m sure you are not ugly at all OP but I know how easy it is to fixate on a body part you don’t like.

Haven’t read the full thread because my phone is being a dick, so I don’t know if someone had already made this point… but photos usually emphasise noses. There’s advice for amateur photographers all over the internet about making noses more flattering in portraits. So whatever you feel about your nose, don’t assume that people see it the way it looks in photos.

I have a big nose and always hated it/wanted a nose job BUT at age 43 you know what I have a partner and kids who love me and my nose and it makes me me !

your partner and kids love you for you !