To be in tears over my nose?

[TheLostNights]

I never let anyone take photos of me as I am a very ugly woman. But the thing that bothers me most is my nose. It is very long and pointy. DH took a photo of one of the kids the other day and my side profile is in it and my nose just looked horrific.
Perhaps foolishly, I googled ways to minimise it naturally like with make up etc but came across an article about a man with the world's longest nose. His was 8CM. Or just over. Measured mine just now from top to the bottom and it's just over 7CM. Which now makes me feel even worse. DH started shouting at me saying it's getting like an obsession but I just hate how freak like it makes me look. Everyone else looks beautiful or at least normal. I hate the fact that unless I have a nose job (which I can't afford ) then I am stuck looking like this.

Oh OP I sympathise with you, I have a large nose, it’s been broken twice and due to the break it makes my face look very asymmetrical, I can’t stand it and wish I could afford a nose job as well.

I think it’s really hard being a woman with a larger nose as the ideal look for a woman is to have a cute ski slope nose and it’s constantly shoved in our faces but one thing that confuses me is that I only consider myself to be hideous.
Whenever I have seen another woman with a bigger nose I always think wow they are gorgeous so I’m sure you really aren’t ugly in the slightest!.

I’m really sorry you are feeling so low about it right now :(

This is my monster of a nose:

I find there's lots of op "why don't you do this it's body dysphoria"? without giving your own story ??

Omg. I really feel for you feeling like this. I don’t know if this is any help at all but can you find a way to love it? Like embrace it for being different and therefore it makes you special for being different? I know that probably sounds ridiculously idealistic. But it’s about self-love. Who wants to look like everyone else? Maybe some therapy to help you change your thoughts. I know I always admire people that are self confident and rocking their true-selves.

@Sandals12 love your story and the fact that you felt it was like a transformation. That is a good outcome - you feel so much better about yourself, gain confidence and no one notices except that you 'glowed up'.

The fact you got it done young also maximises the beneficial effects. You were a determined young woman.

@LumpySpaceGoddess your nose looks great - hand on heart!

I would get counselling, not a nose job.

Sorry but this is true. What does it matter ! I can see a little attacking here.
But really poster does have a point , is it really about looks ?

This is pretty much my story too. Family genes (both sides) colluding to ensure larger than normal noses for all my brothers and I, along with fantastic hair.

Mother beautiful (think Audrey Hepburn), father handsome (think James Dean). Brothers, various degrees of handsomeness/characterfulness. Me? Obsessed in my teens due to teasing by boys, but still asked out on a lot of dates.

One day, the man who later became my husband said to me, in response to me moaning about my nose, 'You know, each of your facial features taken in isolation are not particularly attractive, but all together they really work!'

He didn't gaslight me by pretending my nose isn't big (it is) but it's part of a whole, not an isolated element. I've never considered my nose to be anything other than a part of my whole ever since. Even now, forty years later, when I catch sight of myself in profile, in a mirror or in a photograph, I just smile to myself in the knowledge the sum of me is not my nose.

I imagine it's the same for you OP, although you probably do have some features that are actually attractive in isolation as well!!

As so many other posters have said, people most probably don't even notice your nose and even if they do it will definitely not factor into what they think of you as a person.

Whenever im feeling something about me doesn’t look good, ask yourself if you will care on your death bed. Sorry to put it so bluntly, but what you will care about in the end is that you had a life with your loving Husband/family/friends/kids (if you have them). No one cares what your nose looks like and everyone has photos/angles/part of the body they dislike.

If it is getting you down constantly, you need to talk to someone about that as its such a waste of life to stress over it. The problem with plastic surgery is that it could go wrong and you could end up feeling worse than you do now. I would work on learning to love who you are and how to overcome low self-esteem.

Hi OP, I hope you’re feeling better after reading the majority of these replies. I had a nose job 20 years ago as I felt quite a lot like you do now. My nose wasn’t huge, but it was substantial, very pointed (went down from the top and up from the bottom and met in a pointy bobble) and veered off to one side of my face after a couple of breaks as a teen. I spent hours in front of the mirror, straightening it, covering the bump etc, just to see what I’d look like with a perfect nose. I wasted sooo much time. After the surgery I definitely stopped obsessing over it. But no one else noticed. Seriously, people I’d been friends with for years didn’t notice. My husband can’t tell you which pics of me are before or after surgery!! The only person it made a difference to was me. So, I guess what I’m trying to say is that, if you are able, it’s a hell of a lot cheaper and easier to come to terms with the nose you have, knowing that no one else will care or notice if you spend thousands to change it.
I wasn’t able to do that, but I wish I had been.

This^

@TheLostNights
I don't know that being married speaks to attractiveness one way or the other. I do know many people who are considered attractive, but who do not like taking pictures because they do not think of themselves as photogenic.

Is there anything in life that your nose has prevented you from doing? It sounds as though you are married. You may have kids , family, job, etc. It actually sounds as though the only thing that your nose may have prevented is your developing self confidence and healthy self esteem. That may be a problem that requires a therapist as much or possibly more than a surgeon.

If you cannot afford the surgeon, please try the therapist.

I don't know what you look like, but to me personally, noses give people character.
If you really don't like it, please do something about it. I think it will make you happy,

It was definitely a turning point in my life and I used to lie in bed in my early 20s being so glad I did it. If I had a stronger chin etc I mightve got away with it. It changed the look and dimensions of my face so much. My nose is still not small my any means but it fits a lot better. I'm now sad for my baby daughter as I think she could have this all ahead of her.

You are absolutely not disgusting. Banish this thought forthwith. You sound very genuine and lovely.

Stop it. 😊

We all get stuff in life randomly, some good, some bad, but the length of your nose is not an indication of your worth. If you really don't like it then see what you could do about it in time if you wanted, but in the meantime, be the beautiful person you are.

There isn't another person like you in the whole world. That means you are both priceless and irreplaceable. 💐

💕 You look lovely, interesting and intelligent. I hope you had a good evening.

This pic is actually quite revealing. If I knew you I could identify you from this shot I suggest you take this down !

I had a friend who was obsessed with the size of her nose. It was fine. She had it done and doesn’t regret it many years later. We just think it was unnecessary.
If you love yourself then others will love you too. Your nose is you. Your dh loves you as you are. Please believe him.

I had a nose job at 39, best thing I ever did.

Hated it for years and couldn’t afford it before then.

The improvement in my confidence was amazing, previously when anyone was talking to me I was convinced they were looking at my nose!

Ridiculous I know, but that was how I felt and I don’t think any amount of counselling would have changed that.

Can I join?

My nose is very prominent and I don't think I look great from the side tbh but it does go with the rest of my features tbh. I think I would look strange with a different nose.

After some googling the closest match I can find is Sofia Coppola 😍 though I think mine is more hooked.

We're so conditioned to thinking a tiny, button, Instagram nose is the norm. Every famous person seems to go to the same plastic surgeon and come out with the same teeny nose.

Regardless of that OP, it obviously makes you unhappy so you can either change it (as others have suggested, getting a loan or use finance to pay for surgery) or try to reframe it... find something you love about it... it's unique, not like the tons of curated snub noses you see on social media.

I was never a fan of my nose, I have Middle Eastern features and it shows in my nose most of all... so I got it pierced and I wear cute jewellery. I've learned to love it and embrace.

'You know, each of your facial features taken in isolation are not particularly attractive, but all together they really work!'

This is very true for so many people. It is for me. I have a big nose. Very straight. Very round on the end. It pulls down when I laugh. I used to loath it. But I also have a big chin. And a big forehead. And big eyes. And big cheekbones (or chubby apples). So if I was to get my nose done, I'd have to get my chin done. Then I'd be stuck with bulging eyes, chubby cheeks and a fivehead. But together it all works. It's in balance.

That’s really kind of you, I’m ashamed to say I’ve been suicidal over how my face looks in the past which drove me into a horrible depression as I felt so guilty for feeling that way over something “cosmetic”.