Holiday accommodation & DD

[PotsAndDishes]

Before I roll out my picnic blanket to sit on the proverbial hill I’m choosing to metaphorically die on, AIBU?

We’re going away on holiday with extended family in June. Accommodation is a large villa with additional connected apartments, but with separate entrances. There’s also a pool which is unfenced. Current proposal is that those with young kids (<3) take the apartments, thus ring fencing the kerfuffle at 6:30am when they all wake up, and letting those in the main house get a bit of a holiday lie in.

I have said, OK, makes sense but obviously either DH or I will effectively go to bed with DD (2) each night because I don’t want to leave her by herself in a different building (separate entrances) with potential hazards around (unfenced pool, one apt is up stone steps with a balcony, what if the air con catches fire).

According to the in-laws, I’m being TOTALLY unreasonable, PFB-esque, nothing will happen to her, just lock all of the doors so she can’t get out, it’s no different to her being asleep upstairs in the house, I’m creating a rod for my own back, just whack on a baby monitor, blah blah blah.

So, AIBU? Should I chill out, take the monitor, hope it stretches and enjoy my evenings in the main villa?
Or AINBU and leaving a 2 year old asleep locked in a different building isn’t really OK?

I think the rest of your family have no clue what it's like having a two year old.

I'd basically have her wearing a life jacket all the time and yes to sleep in the same building!!!

If you and DH are willing to go to bed early with DD then it’s really not any of their business. Even if you didn’t have a child, if you wanted to go to bed early on your holiday that’s none of their business either, frankly. Perhaps if it’s your husband’s family, you can volunteer to be the one to go to bed early with DD so your husband can still spend time with his family if that’s what they’re worried about (and you have an excuse to escape!)

Just have to say one name: Madeline McCann. ... YANBU

I’m just going to say 2 words to give you an understanding of leaving an unattended child in a holiday apartment…..

Madeline McCann 👀

YADNBU

@Loopylooo22 that's what came to my mind when I read the post.

Ummmm madeline maccan?? Never in a million years should anyone be locking a 2 year ola alone in an apartment and going about their evening, this is shocking behaviour. Kids also generally stay up later on hols so is it a massive deal that you leave when kiddo is ready for bed anyways?

Honestly I think it's irresponsible to leave young children in a building alone..
I would be so so uncomfortable with that.
Imagine a child gets hurt or goes missing?
No way even an older child I would not be leaving. I don't think your unreasonable and don't be bullied in to it you are your own person and parent the way you want.
Are we all forgetting what happened in Portugal?

Can all those parroting "um, remember one name" at least have the decency to make sure you're spelling it right. Hardly anyone has. Fucking ridiculous

This is confusing. If the 'apartments' are in the same building with direct interior access to the main house, I don't see a major problem. Yes, you could firmly lock the outside entrance, use a baby monitor, and check on the child occasionally. I would be concerned if they had their own stoves, bathrooms, etc.

If the apartments are, as you say, in a separate building, there's no way even my 10 yo would sleep there without, yes, one of you turning in for the night. But you know what, if it's your husband who has to go to bed when the child does, the ILs, parents, siblings will not be pleased. And I would let the children stay up or curl up in a corner until I was ready to go to bed. The ILs could have their quiet morning, but one hell of an evening.

I had my Doordash app hacked just so some bum 4 states over could score a free cheeseburger. Taking that into account, what's keeping a tech savvy pedo from getting your ip address, hacking your electronic, and finding out the address to this now publicly known toddler-run vacation spot? Don't let you child be the next Madeleine McCann. Trust your gut. Stay with your kid.

YANBU. No way would I leave my 2 yr old alone in another apartment. Reminds me of Maddie McCann only those idiots left the sliding door to the apartment unlocked.

To be fair if I was you I would no longer feel comfortable leaving this baby in their care from here on... anything can happen to her thanks to their neglectful attitude.

You ANBU. Have in-laws sleep in the other room/apartment! If it’s my grandchild, I would want her/him in my bed (I’m a 1st time grandmother) just saying and wouldn’t have it any other way. Children are precious, they need protecting, and to feel secure. In-laws are the very definition of unreasonable with this request. All grandparents I’ve every met feel the same way. TATX

not to mention that a dingo could snatch your baby in the middle of the night 😬

sometimes I think fenced pools just give people a false sense of security. They assume kids don’t need to be supervised because of the fence but what happens when someone leaves the gate open or the kid learns to climb over or open the latch?

This might be the dumbest response. If you let all the far fetched “what ifs” dictate your life choices, you would have to keep your kids locked in a bunker their entire life.

Nobody has suggested the op lock her kids in a bunker, Crys, nor would she!