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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to pay for the cracked plate?

270 replies

PinkStarAtNight · 17/04/2023 01:03

DP and I are staying in a holiday cottage for the week. We paid around £500 for the week, its in a nice area down south.

Tonight I have accidentally cracked one of the plates. I think it happened because I put it in the microwave. I have to have my food hot in order to eat it so I microwaved the last half of my meal. This is something I do often at home and have never cracked a plate, apart from one time a few years ago with some very cheap plates from The Range. I put it down to them being cheap and so cracked easily. However, the plate that has cracked in the cottage looks like a nice one. Its one of those that are hand painted (fruit).

Anyway, I did a quick Google to try gauge the value and it seems you can get a painted fruit plate for £10. I personally wouldn't pay more than £10 for the plate in question, so when I told DP what had happened I suggested we buy some superglue when we're out tomorrow and do our best to mend it, but that we also leave behind £10 so that if they notice the crack and want a new one they can buy another plate.

DP is annoyed about the plate being cracked and it put a downer on our evening because he's stressed about us possibly being charged. He doesn't agree we should leave the £10, he thinks we should hide the plate and hope they don't notice. He says he's annoyed at my suggestion of supergluing it AND leaving behind money because he says the only reason you would superglue is if you week going to try disguise it, as he thinks we should do, so why would you also leave money?
He thinks the plate is worth more than £10. I said that if the plate is worth more than £10 they shouldn't have left it in a holiday cottage that they rent out. This made him more annoyed and he said they were trying to make the place nice by equipping it with nice plates and they don't expect people to break them...

He also got annoyed with me because when I was washing the plate, a little bit on the edge where it was cracked got washed off (I hooked it out of the sink and put it back on there, so we could superglue it). He says I wasn't being careful enough. But when the plate was on the table and he was inspecting the crack he kept picking at the bit on the edge. I told him not to and that it would cause it to come off but he kept picking. Then, when it did come off whilst I was washing it he said it was my fault for not washing it carefully enough!

I ended up coming upstairs to bed because I didn't want an argument, but am now lying on the bed listening to him walk around downstairs muttering things under his breath, one of the being 'beyond help...beyond help'.

AIBU to think he is overreacting a bit and we could just superglue and leave behind £10 as a good will gesture, or is this a bigger deal than that and he has a right to be annoyed with me and also think I'm being U for wanting to leave the £10?

OP posts:
HerRoyalNotness · 17/04/2023 01:08

I wouldn’t superglue, just leave the £10 with a note.

your DP sounds over dramatic!

ToWorryOrNot · 17/04/2023 01:11

I manage an Airbnb (high end) and honestly don’t bother trying to superglue it, it will still look cracked and will only break again at some point.

I think leaving £10 sounds fair and also leave a note to apologise and explain, and ask to let you know if that’s not enough. That would be a much better option than not saying anything and hoping they don’t notice (they will notice!). We generally charge guests £5 for any broken glasses or crockery so £10 should be plenty, and as you say if it was priceless then it wouldn’t be in a holiday let.

Your DP is being a massive dick, as an aside. A broken plate really isn’t worth ruining a holiday over.

Aquamarine1029 · 17/04/2023 01:11

I wouldn't give this a second thought at all. Both of you are making a mountain out of a molehill.

Willywanderer · 17/04/2023 01:13

Not much else going on eh? Seriously this would be worth a minute's thought, no more

Daftasyoulike · 17/04/2023 01:16

Please OP, just tell the cottage owner what has happened, as soon as possible, so that they can tell you what they would like you to do. I own a holiday cottage, and would far rather someone owned up to an accident, than try to hide it, as that is really devious, and if there is a set of say 4 plates and the next guests need all 4, by keeping quiet about it, you're not giving the owner a chance to replace it in time, thereby possibly spoiling the next guest's enjoyment of the property and causing the owner a lot of stress on changeover day. It's possible that they may have a couple of spares, if they bought 6 and only need 4 in the cottage, so they may just say not to worry, and thank you for your honesty. Personally, I would be really cross about you supergluing and trying to hide it as your DP wants to do, and would not only ban you from visiting again, but put your details on the various hospitality groups, which could result in your being turned down next time you want to rent a place. Please be honest, the owner WILL appreciate it!

ToWorryOrNot · 17/04/2023 01:16

Also re his ‘don’t expect people to break them’ comment - well no of course it’s not expected of guests but it does happen pretty regularly, accidents happen. And muttering insults about you under his breath - I think you have bigger problems than the plate.

Leobynature · 17/04/2023 01:19

I wish I had these problems in my life….

ThinWomansBrain · 17/04/2023 01:20

I once broke a teapot in a cottage and just replaced it.
Mt sister had expensive-ive bowls that had metal in them - I exploded one :(

TBH, I think owners must expect the occasional breakage (and should probably go for fairly bland interchangeable china & microwaveable to facilitate swapping stuff in).
I think you should let them know, leave some money to cover it if you feel comfortable with that, £10 for a plate seems generous.
Trying to hide and superglue it is disingenuous rather unfair.

Saracen · 17/04/2023 01:32

I agree with others. Don't bother with superglue as it doesn't really work and won't be very nice for the next guests. We've had a few similar incidents in holiday homes, and I always contact the host ASAP in case they need to shop for a replacement before changeover day. That's more convenient for them than discovering the problem on arrival and having to dash around getting another plate at short notice.

Saracen · 17/04/2023 01:37

I agree with you that it's silly to have non-microwaveable plates in a holiday house. But such plates are surprisingly common, so now you know it's better not to make assumptions. I only microwave crockery if it says "microwaveable" on the underside, or if they are mine and I don't care about them!

Phoebo · 17/04/2023 03:24

HerRoyalNotness · 17/04/2023 01:08

I wouldn’t superglue, just leave the £10 with a note.

your DP sounds over dramatic!

This. You sound like a good person 😌

maddy68 · 17/04/2023 03:28

Just leave a note saying you broke a plate and leave €10
They do know that breakages happen

GBoucher · 17/04/2023 03:43

Why don't you contact the owner and offer to compensate? The plate could be worth £30 or £3. Why speculate? It's not true only cheap plates break in the microwave. I've broken very expensive plates in the microwave because they weren't meant to go in there. I once was mortified at having broken an antique-looking nutcracker in Italy, but when I told the landlady and offered to compensate her she said it was ancient but not valuable and not to worry about it.

marseille · 17/04/2023 03:54

Do you really get up in the middle of your dinner and put it in the microwave?
Even at a restaurant?
WHy has nobody else noticed this?

CorinaCortado · 17/04/2023 04:05

imagine having the time or inclination to give a broken plate a second thought never mind writing a hand wringing thread about it

Ontobetterthings · 17/04/2023 04:08

Doesn't sound much of a holiday if a broken plate taking up all your time

NowItsSpring · 17/04/2023 08:12

I broke two mugs in a holiday cottage due to tripping when carrying a tray. We were one of the first stays after refurbishment and everything was new. Emailed the owner offering to pay for replacements - he responded that this wasn't necessary amd left me great feedback.

Alrightknow · 17/04/2023 08:20

I agree with telling the owner as soon as possible. It's likely they won't even mind, accidents happen. I once broke a couple of wine glasses when I dropped them during trying to wash them up. Emailed the owner offering to leave some cash to replace them. He said not to worry and thanks for my honesty!

Mephisneon · 17/04/2023 08:26

Your partner sounds domineering. Is everything normally this dramatic in your life though? It's just a broken plate. Leave the money if it will make you feel better.

AllAboardTootToot · 17/04/2023 08:29

Drama llama central! Leave the tenner and be done with it already, life is far too short for this over dramatic bullshit.

TimeForMeToF1y · 17/04/2023 08:30

What a lot of drama over a non incident

Isn't the normal thing to do to let the owner know, apologise and see what they say. It wouldn't occur to me to spend my holiday shopping for a replacement. Surely holiday place owners don't stock them with plates that cost a tenner each do they?

TheFlis12345 · 17/04/2023 08:30

I can’t believe either of you are stressing and giving a single plate so much head space while you are in holiday!

SecretiveSquirrel · 17/04/2023 08:31

Sounds like a cheap plate. That’s never happened to me and I am old.

Email or message the owner asap and tell them.

Nordicrain · 17/04/2023 08:31

I can't bellieve anyone with a holiday let leaves plates that are more than £10 each. That would be a silly thing to do, because things break. I think your DH is being a drama queen.

Gardeningdogs · 17/04/2023 08:33

I would often heat my meal midway through it, when eating out I request my food be served extra hot if possible and have no hesitation in asking for it to be stuck in a microwave if it's served to cold for me. If my food isn't really hot I find it tasteless, it's strange but really, it just doesn't have a taste unless it's steaming.