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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to pay for the cracked plate?

270 replies

PinkStarAtNight · 17/04/2023 01:03

DP and I are staying in a holiday cottage for the week. We paid around £500 for the week, its in a nice area down south.

Tonight I have accidentally cracked one of the plates. I think it happened because I put it in the microwave. I have to have my food hot in order to eat it so I microwaved the last half of my meal. This is something I do often at home and have never cracked a plate, apart from one time a few years ago with some very cheap plates from The Range. I put it down to them being cheap and so cracked easily. However, the plate that has cracked in the cottage looks like a nice one. Its one of those that are hand painted (fruit).

Anyway, I did a quick Google to try gauge the value and it seems you can get a painted fruit plate for £10. I personally wouldn't pay more than £10 for the plate in question, so when I told DP what had happened I suggested we buy some superglue when we're out tomorrow and do our best to mend it, but that we also leave behind £10 so that if they notice the crack and want a new one they can buy another plate.

DP is annoyed about the plate being cracked and it put a downer on our evening because he's stressed about us possibly being charged. He doesn't agree we should leave the £10, he thinks we should hide the plate and hope they don't notice. He says he's annoyed at my suggestion of supergluing it AND leaving behind money because he says the only reason you would superglue is if you week going to try disguise it, as he thinks we should do, so why would you also leave money?
He thinks the plate is worth more than £10. I said that if the plate is worth more than £10 they shouldn't have left it in a holiday cottage that they rent out. This made him more annoyed and he said they were trying to make the place nice by equipping it with nice plates and they don't expect people to break them...

He also got annoyed with me because when I was washing the plate, a little bit on the edge where it was cracked got washed off (I hooked it out of the sink and put it back on there, so we could superglue it). He says I wasn't being careful enough. But when the plate was on the table and he was inspecting the crack he kept picking at the bit on the edge. I told him not to and that it would cause it to come off but he kept picking. Then, when it did come off whilst I was washing it he said it was my fault for not washing it carefully enough!

I ended up coming upstairs to bed because I didn't want an argument, but am now lying on the bed listening to him walk around downstairs muttering things under his breath, one of the being 'beyond help...beyond help'.

AIBU to think he is overreacting a bit and we could just superglue and leave behind £10 as a good will gesture, or is this a bigger deal than that and he has a right to be annoyed with me and also think I'm being U for wanting to leave the £10?

OP posts:
millym102 · 17/04/2023 19:23

I broke a pan lid by dropping it on holiday. Left a note apologising and asking if they wanted us to pay. They didn't want any money for it. It was fine.

Your partner sounds really quite unpleasant though.

Reigateforever · 17/04/2023 19:28

I often reheat my food in the microwave on one of my dinner plates and cook porridge in a chi a bowl. Maybe it was damaged before hand. I was washing a teacup in hot water when the cup fell into the water while I was holding the handle, it had been glued.
When we rented out a flat all the crockery could be bought in the local shop.

Willmafrockfit · 17/04/2023 19:29

i wouldnt glue it

moomoomoo27 · 17/04/2023 19:30

It's probably not worth anywhere near that, I used to work at a catalogue company and all their hand painted plates were done in China for pennies, they sold whole dinner sets for under £60 to customers and still made a big profit.

viques · 17/04/2023 19:30

mainsfed · 17/04/2023 13:56

His mum said they have broken glasses/plates a few times and just hidden them either at the back of the cupboard or back of the plate rack and it has always been fine, so he says he's going with what his mum says.

That's very underhand.

So the next family may potentially get the blame for the broken plate depending on when it's discovered.

He sounds awful, especially as chances are the owners will say it's fine if you let them know what happened.

I agree, what a childish thing to do. If you are old enough to rent a holiday cottage you are old enough to own up to breaking things accidentally. As a pp said, cottage owners need to know so they can make sure stuff is replaced for the next renters to use. I have only every broken one thing , told the owner and they said “no problem, I have a box of stuff in my garage to top up breakages.”

Lasouthpaw · 17/04/2023 19:32

Wow. So much angst over a plate in a holiday rental. Just tell them it cracked. I bet they won't be bothered at all.

I once stayed in a beautiful new lodge with the most stunning view. We stupidly left a disposable barbecue cooling on the decking and it melted it. (We didn't know the decking was a type of plastic)

I went to the owners and told them immediately and offered to pay for the damage. They told me not to worry. That's much worse than cracking a plate!

MysteryBelle · 17/04/2023 19:36

PinkStarAtNight · 17/04/2023 14:35

We had another chat about it this afternoon. He has apologised for overreacting. I told him about the amount of people who have said that we really should be letting the owners know, and pointed out that they may want to get a replacement before changeover. He then understood and agreed to message them and offer to pay. We did that and they have replied and said not to worry!

He admitted that he was a bit annoyed with me always microwaving the food and that's maybe why he overreacted about the plate. I know this is not normal and I hate having to do it, it annoys me! But I just can't eat cold or lukewarm food so I can't really help it. Don't think there was any need for the nasty comments about me being a lunatic and his family being vile, but it is mumsnet after all!

Thanks to the people who replied with constructive advice about what to do.

Didn’t see your update! Well done on resolving the issue, you did exactly the right thing. Sounds like your husband was annoyed by your microwaving your dinner half way through and the cracked plate triggered a row 😂 we all have our quirks and hopefully we are tolerant of our spouses’ foibles and they ours 😀

Pixie2015 · 17/04/2023 19:39

Just bin it and leave a note to say the plate cracked. It happens and it may have been damaged before

MysteryBelle · 17/04/2023 19:39

I forgot your h said he wanted to hide the cracked plate! That is so underhanded and deceptive, cowardly too. He has a serious ethics deficiency!

Movinghouseatlast · 17/04/2023 19:39

Don't superglue it. Nobody should eat from a superglue plate!

I own holiday lets and yes I expect breakages and don't charge for them.

Unless someone breaks an entire ceramic hob by putting a pan on top of a plastic bag when pissed... I charged for that as the entire cooker had to be replaced!

WilsonMilson · 17/04/2023 19:39

You’re both being extremely dramatic about a very small issue. I cannot imagine ever arguing with DH over a broken plate in a rental cottage.

The owners are idiots if they have expensive crockery in a rental. Leaving a tenner is nice with a little note, I can’t imagine giving it any extra thought than that, and surely your DH isn’t getting his panties in a bunch over a tenner?

SpeckledlyHen · 17/04/2023 19:41

I am so glad I don't have the traumatic problems you face in my life.. what happens with the pair of you when there is a genuine problem?

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 17/04/2023 19:44

You both sound over the top. Why would you glue it, for a start. That sounds really unhealthy.

And then also leave a tenner. A tenner? For a plate?

Just call the owner tomorrow. Drama over.

Badbudgeter · 17/04/2023 19:45

I think it’s nuts to have non microwave plates in a holiday cottage. I used to run a holiday cottage and whilst it was stone built and charming and quaint the crockery was practical. Normally people would leave a broken glass or plate on the side sometimes with a fiver. This is so you know to replace stuff. It’s much more sensible to have white plates and wine glasses that fit I the dishwasher than impractical bits however lovely.

He sounds like an arse though.

Mamabear48 · 17/04/2023 19:47

Wow you both need to get over it and throw the plate in the bin

Shakespeareandi · 17/04/2023 19:52

Accidents happen. Just offer to pay, ask the owner directly. No big issue. The latest airbnb we stayed in had a note saying just that"accidents happen, don't worry about. Just let us know if any crockery breaks so we can replace it before the next guest ". I would imagine being an Airbnb owner you sort of know this happens occasionally and put easily replaceable, or some of your old crockery in there. I would be annoyed if I found it had been super glued rather than told about it.

DurdleLau · 17/04/2023 19:54

I’d just tell the owner, I’d imagine they wouldn’t have their best most valuable dinner service available in a holiday let for everyone to use. Be honest and they will probably (hopefully!) surprise your DH.

Holliboobies · 17/04/2023 19:59

good grief Get a life.

Mosaic123 · 17/04/2023 20:00

My cousin who rents out a holiday home has numerous breakages. They buy spares of each type of item so they can replace them.

Whatkindofuckeryisthis · 17/04/2023 20:01

You both sound bloody bonkers! How do you have the time to care about such trivial things? Leave a tenner and a note and forget it, they won’t care!

JackiePlace · 17/04/2023 20:16

Superglue isn't food safe, so don't do that.
What brand of plate is it? I think you should pay to replace it, up to a limit. If it's a valuable antique they shouldn't have left it in a holiday cottage.

Blogswife · 17/04/2023 20:18

Why on earth can’t you contact the owners & explain what’s happened . They’ll either ask you to pay or write it off to wear & tear
You could superglue or hide it but thats quite shitty behaviour isn’t it ?

Moonshine160 · 17/04/2023 20:18

It’s a bloody plate.

Irritateandunreasonable · 17/04/2023 20:21

Someone please tell me who the hell os voting YBU.

This is insane and hilarious 🤣🤣🤣🤣 just pay for the plate.

Casperroonie · 17/04/2023 20:21

I dread to think what he'd do if anything actually bad or serious happened 🤣😳. You can get a 12 piece set (decent) from places like Dunhelm for £25. I'd say to the owner what happened and leave it. If it was precious it shouldn't have been used in a holiday let.

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