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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu: the new Vanish advert makes autistic teens look like assholes

264 replies

Squirrefromthewirrell · 13/04/2023 16:47

Just seen the new (at least to me) vanish detergent advert. It focuses on an autistic teen girl called Ash who has a favourite hoodie. All through the add the character is just displaying awful behaviour that even being autistic doesn't excuse (shouting at siblings to shut up, having a go at someone who accidentally walks into her, playing drums whilst her family are trying to spend time together)

Am I wrong to think it's just showing a very unsavoury side ? The overall message is lovely - extend the life of familiar clothes that can comfort people like ash who are autistic but the actual advert just rubbed me the wrong way

OP posts:
RudsyFarmer · 13/04/2023 16:50

I saw that advert a few weeks ago and found it quite moving actually.

44PumpLane · 13/04/2023 16:53

I disagree that's what it's showing....when the girl bumps into her it shows her in distress telling her friends that someone pushed her on purpose, whereas it looks like a bustling corridor accident to the viewer and highlights how she interprets a fairly normal situation in a way that causes her upset rather then brushing it off.

It made me quite emotional watching it as I have a young daughter currently being assessed and there were elements of it that were really relatable.

TheFlis12345 · 13/04/2023 16:53

I thought it was amazing and very reflective of autistic family members of a similar age.

If it helps you to know, Ash is a real autistic teen, not an actor. That is her real family and friends, and they all helped write the script.

SleepingStandingUp · 13/04/2023 16:55

I think you need to watch it twice. First time round, she's just a kid playing up. Once you know she's autistic, her behaviour makes sense. And how quick to judge we are.
Perhaps that's the familys reality, rather than someone making up what they think might happen

Lostatsea10 · 13/04/2023 16:55

She isn’t playing a character, she is real and has ASC and they are (I believe) her real family and friends and all of whom helped write it. It’s not unsavoury, it’s their lives.

It made me sob. My DS is only 5 but so noise sensitive and struggles with his younger brother now, I can absolutely believe that will be us in 10 years.

AngelinaBallerina122 · 13/04/2023 16:56

My family found it scary we thought it was an ad for NSPCC or Bernado's.
We have several family members, previous neighbours and friends of DC who have autism but clearly it's nothing like experiencing autism first hand. Even though it was uncomfortable to watch I feel it educated me more about autism.

wonderstuff · 13/04/2023 16:59

I think the extended version is better, once you’ve seen that the shorter one makes more sense. I think it’s a fairly realistic portrayal of autistic teen, and autistic girls are rarely shown in media, I really liked it. Wish more schools would be as accommodating of non-uniform clothes, don’t think it’s really often understood how clothes can help kids regulate their emotions.

NualaMay · 13/04/2023 17:01

I personally found it eye-opening to watch. Made me realise how much of a struggle it must be to parent an autistic teen, how much patience is required.

MrsDoylesDoily · 13/04/2023 17:01

I don't really think it's up to anyone to decide that being autistic doesn't 'excuse' her behaviour.

She had a hand in writing the advert, and autism can often be a cause of some behaviours. No-one's using it as an 'excuse'.

Bumpingaway · 13/04/2023 17:03

I found parts of it uncomfortable- when DS is struggling he feels like an accidental bump is a purposeful shove, he will snap and we’ll have to walk on eggshells.

To me the girl is displaying unmet needs but I also understand that it’s a collection of the girl’s difficulties and in real life may not happen everyday.

BewareTheBeardedDragon · 13/04/2023 17:03

I have an autistic teen and I knew she was autistic from the moment it started, having never seen or heard of it before. It spoke to me and felt very real. I didn't think she came across badly.

Allmarbleslost · 13/04/2023 17:04

As the mother of an autistic teenage daughter I found it very emotional. It's her to a tee.

EineReiseDurchDieZeit · 13/04/2023 17:04

I thought it was very good actually and as others have said is Ash's own reflection on her issues

AgrathaChristie · 13/04/2023 17:07

I don’t take notice of adverts, they do just wash over me. I didn’t register this was an ad for a product, I saw a distressed teenager and thought she’d been bullied/ scared by various things ( someone shouted shut up I think and there was drumming) I thought it was to do with MH support for teens. I’ll try to catch it as obviously need to watch it more carefully.

Lostatsea10 · 13/04/2023 17:08

As an aside for those of you who have similar favourite clothing issues (it’s always a hoody here) I now buy 3 in the same size of whatever his favourite is and rotate equally. One on, one off and one in the wash. I make sure they’re worn in turn and washed equally so there isn’t a more worn one. It means I’m not panicking and frantically trying to get it dry ready for wear again.

I’m sure many of you do this if needed, but if it can help someone 🤷‍♀️ and save a meltdown.

Layla30 · 13/04/2023 17:09

I have watched it twice and both times just can’t get passed feeling so sorry for the sister.
That is possibly because my daughters friend is in exactly that situation and I see how it affects her so much!

Mycatisfatafatcat · 13/04/2023 17:09

I had absolutely no idea what was going on until the 3rd or 4th view. Then I wasn’t sure who was meant to be the good person/ bad person or what the fuck it was trying to tell me. Beyond that I should buy Vanish because they’re just so socially aware.

Clymene · 13/04/2023 17:09

I really liked it. The threads on here though show how little understanding so many people have of autism sadly.

Original poster
Squirrefromthewirrell · 13/04/2023 17:10

I didn't know they weren't actors / it was written and based off their real lives. The short version doesn't say any of that at least not that I noticed, will go and watch the extended version and see if it changes my mind.

I appreciate everyone else's thoughts though and if the majority like it then I guess it's me lol.

100% for representation for autistic women and girls in the media this advert just hasn't done it for me

OP posts:
Mycatisfatafatcat · 13/04/2023 17:11

Why does she tell her classmate she’s going to fail her exam too?

coffeecupsandwaxmelts · 13/04/2023 17:12

I'm autistic and really liked the advert.

It reminded me a lot of my teenage years.

Notonthestairs · 13/04/2023 17:13

Lostatsea10 · 13/04/2023 17:08

As an aside for those of you who have similar favourite clothing issues (it’s always a hoody here) I now buy 3 in the same size of whatever his favourite is and rotate equally. One on, one off and one in the wash. I make sure they’re worn in turn and washed equally so there isn’t a more worn one. It means I’m not panicking and frantically trying to get it dry ready for wear again.

I’m sure many of you do this if needed, but if it can help someone 🤷‍♀️ and save a meltdown.

DD has a new favourite important item and this is a very welcome reminder to get extras now AND get them worn in. Thank you!

itsmylife7 · 13/04/2023 17:14

I don't watch live TV is there another way of seeing the add ?

PoorOldHorse · 13/04/2023 17:17

This reply has been deleted

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Cellowaves · 13/04/2023 17:17

Mycatisfatafatcat · 13/04/2023 17:11

Why does she tell her classmate she’s going to fail her exam too?

Probably because that's what she thinks.

Autism is characterised by social communication difficulties and it's extremely common for autistic people (particularly children and young people) so say exactly what's on their mind, without the wider understanding of whether or not it's socially appropriate or acceptable to do.

I've not seen the ad yet so can't comment. But I'm an autistic woman, with autistic daughters. Sounds pretty spot on from reading the comments!

It sounds like it's depicting a tough life marked with difficult and sometimes inappropriate interactions. Well, yeah.....that's how it is!!

I will watch and see:

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