To be annoyed at other sites discussing mumsnet users?

[partlyportly]

I've noticed that some Mumsnet posts and discussions are being shared on other websites, forums, and social media platforms without the author's consent. I find this really frustrating and wonder if IABU in feeling this way.

I understand that Mumsnet is a public forum, and anyone can read and participate in discussions. But when our posts are taken out of context and shared elsewhere, it feels like a violation of our privacy and a breach of trust. It's especially frustrating when people on other sites start making assumptions or passing judgment based on a single post they've seen, without knowing the full story.

I'm not saying that Mumsnet discussions should be kept completely private, but I do think that we should have some control over where our posts end up. It would be helpful if we could have an option to mark our posts as "private" or "not for sharing," so that we know that they won't be legally copied and pasted elsewhere without our permission.

I'm curious to know if other Mumsnet members feel the same way. Does it bother you when Mumsnet posts are shared on other sites?

YABU = It's the internet, deal with it
YANBU = It's poor form, I don't like it

There are loads of mumsnetters who are also on tattle, it's not either/or.

The information they are required to protect (name/email/contact details) is protected.

They don't need to protect stuff you freely post on the public forums.

Of course. But to screenshot your own post, pretend it’s not yours and post it to mock it… that’s a whole other ball game.

I think that poster was mocking the response to their post, not their own post.

Oh right, you were referring to an entirely different topic to the one being discussed on the thread

Just look on the people who join in on that thread as losers who have nothing going for them in life.

Yep, it's the internet, I'm afraid.

MN users will also be users of other fora.

I know that reddit has a discussion board dedicates to MN trolls. It's toxic.

Personally I think it's quite hypocritical for posters here to dismiss other sites as toxic and awful when MN itself is pretty toxic and awful a lot of the time.

I've had some lovely support here, particularly when going through baby loss, but many boards are a bear pit, with posters getting jumped on for the most innocuous things.

You cannot police mean comments. Mean comments are free speech. Free speech is valuable.

They're an absolute bunch of unhappy bitches. Don't take any heed.

"It's especially frustrating when people on other sites start making assumptions or passing judgment based on a single post they've seen, without knowing the full story."

Of course, no-one on MN ever does this.

I think it's a case of, if you don't want pictures of yourself all over the internet, then don't post pictures of yourself on the internet. It's rubbish that others have done this op , but once you've posted anything on the Web it's available for abuse.

Right!

It's not nice but people are judgmental. They do it IRL all the time.
The only control you have is about what you share of your life and self onine. Once it's out, it's out there forever.

Mumsnet does it itself - it takes posts and shares them on Facebook to get traction.

partlyportly · Today 08:32

"I understand that Mumsnet is a public forum"
"a violation of our privacy"

There's your problem. Both statements are mutually exclusive.

Think of the Internet as a large town square.
Any pic you put on the internet is like sticking it on a billboard and any information you provide is being broadcast to millions of people.The only privacy you have is anonymity, hence the user names and not full names. Anything you reveal after that is open for everyones consumption. Its like standing naked on the High Street and demanding no one looks. To expect anything else is, at best, naive. Unless people are tagging you or bringing it to your attention you are being very unreasonable.

I’ve never understood Tattle. The posters go on there to find solidarity with fellow bitches by being nasty, but if they had no one external to bitch about they’d of course all turn on each other. I guess most of them are very young.

MN isn't perfect but I am not aware of MN dedicating a whole topic to slag off specific users from another site.

I have spotted an mn username on this very thread that appears on the MN trolls thread.

But when our posts are taken out of context and shared elsewhere, it feels like a violation of our privacy and a breach of trust.

It's not private if you post it on a public website.

Nobody on the internet has promised that you can trust them and you shouldn't assume that you can.

You've posted something very public, people can share it and talk about it. Don't post anything on here that can't handle that.

FWIW they pick on quite beautiful women for the smallest things so I wouldn’t take it personally.

On a past thread I wrote (which has now been deleted by my request) it was taken in by bloody DailyMail. I felt as if alot of it was taken out of context in the article, and did not include any of my follow up replies that adds to the story or explains things etc. It was an incredibly sensitive topic and I was gobsmacked it was essentially ‘sniped’ by the fuckers. Read the replies in the comment section of the DM article and I was called all sorts, dumb bitch, silly cow, it was my fault etc. Still makes me a tad upset when I think of it but yeah, assuming by posters on here it was/is my fault because this place is public.

Tattle and Reddit are my go to places when I suspect a troll. They've usually already spotted them.

A lot of threads are talking about influencers with genuine criticisms, fair enough really for people who make their living by shilling or exploiting vulnerable people by projecting a fake life on their social media. There is a rule to keep it on tattle, meaning these people aren't messaging or commenting mean things on their profile and people need to actively look at tattle to see what's being said about them. People are often called out for taking it too far, like in any job people will be critical of what you do, if you choose to sell yourself and your life to the Internet and in the public domain then you should be prepared for people to discuss it in the public domain. I do agree reposting photos from on here is unfair and weird though.

Never, ever, ever read Daily Mail comments! They are barely literate.

A lot of Tattle is nasty (I really hate anything criticising other people's appearances - this, by the way, happens constantly on MN which is IMO is one of the absolute worst places on the internet for fat shaming, but that's a whole other thread) but there are some very valid threads on there with intelligent debate, as well as some supportive ones. I think the posters there are a similar demographic to MN. There is a lot of crossover, much as posters on here won't want to admit it.