I see it a lot on mumsnet to be honest, if a woman says she’s pregnant after a short fling, posters piling on to say what a shit the father is for not being thrilled, but how fantastic the OP is. Whilst the father is clearly a dick for not using condoms if he didn’t want kids, I think it’s also pretty shitty behaviour from the woman in question and most of the time it’s obvious from how thrilled she is that it wasn’t simply a “contraception failure”
Yeah, pretty much. The nonsense "well he had unprotected sex with you, what did he expect, congratulations!" Like she's some kind of hero for lying about being on birth control, resulting in a child that one parent wants nothing to do with. A parent who would not have gone anywhere near the mother if she hadn't been deceptive about her birth control. Knowingly having sex with a 1% chance of an accident is not the same as having sex with someone knowing there's a high likelihood of pregnancy, and is trying to get pregnant, so will 100% keep any resulting pregnancy.
Yes, they both conceived the child. But that's not the same as keeping the child and raising it for the rest of your life (18yrs at least). She can terminate, with zero regard to the father's feelings, he might be relieved, or he might be heartbroken. But there's no one up in arms about that. But if she chooses to have a child the other parent states they do not wish to have, she then declares him a deadbeat with a chorus of support because, she made a choice against the other parent's wishes. Of course, choose to keep your child. Choose whatever you like. But own your decision. You knew the situation when you chose to keep the child.
Obviously doesn't apply to planned children, where the fathers leave. But then far fewer of those are totally absent and non paying. There are exceptions, but it's much less common than a man who doesn't want a child, clearly explaining this from the offset, then shock horror, not wanting the child.