I don't care if my dh has sleep apnea, his snoring makes me want to kill him

[Changeau]

Sort of lghthearted, and then again, not.

If@Tempone doesn't have apnoea, there simply aren't any reliable treatments. The reason this surgery is only available privately, is because it doesn't have any reasonable success rate. It can even make the snoring worse.

The consultant I saw at the hospital was very sympathetic, but having ruled out apnoea, there was nothing he could offer.

For the record, I'm a size ten, so losing weight isn't even an option.

@Tempone I genuinely do feel sympathy for you but if you are really triggered by the language here perhaps hide the thread? Unless you really want to see if there are any tips and not just police language. I'm too tired to see it from both sides today!

Why would she (or I?)

This thread is full of people who mistakenly think that there's something we can do, and we're shitty for not doing it.
We're entitled to correct that. In the absence of apnoea and excess weight, there isn't.

I researched this because my DH forgot it when he was working away once and I panicked that he might just die in his sleep (he wouldn't I was over panicking!) and apparently the effects of the cpap last 2-3 days so if you skip one night on it you would still get better sleep of you have been using it consistently before that which is useful

But this is a thread about sleep apnea. The OPs husband is coming on complain about her husband because he has a medical condition that impacts her and he is refusing to get it treated

She doesn't deserve to have people with a different unrelated medical condition to come on and berate her because their condition is untreatable.

I can't believe couples who 'won't let' their partner sleep in a separate room .. assuming you have the space. How pathetically needy ... just move to a different room, what is your DP really going to do about it?

I dont need to be corrected, thanks. I am sure my dh has sleep apnea. It may be that he doesn't. But until he goes and gets it checked out I am entitled to want to murder him.

Because I'm tired of being assumed as lazy fat and selfish for a medical condition that I can't do anything for..why should I hide the thread? is this the thread police I can comment on what I like. I'm not being rude to anyone. Some people upthread still think that there is some magical thing I can do despite not having sleep apnoea.

But this thread isn't about you or a support thread for snorers. Perhaps start your own.

Sorry thread police I'll always ensure insteadvof commenting I'll start my own thread is that okay with you now?

If you are unhappy with the replies you get when you jump onto someone's thread pointing out how mean they are for not seeing it from your angle, then yes, starting your own would be preferable.

She doesn't deserve to have people with a different unrelated medical condition to come on and berate her because their condition is untreatable.

I haven't berated op..I have shared my experience. I have been called lazy, selfish, hard to live with because of a medical condition that I have. I have not interacted with op about her dh's condition at all.

No, you haven't.

If you are unhappy with the replies you get when you jump onto someone's thread pointing out how mean they are for not seeing it from your angle, then yes, starting your own would be preferable.

They don't see it from my angle because they seem to think I can magically cure it with cpap. Once more for the cheap seats in the back...... cpap will only help with apnoea. Also I can reply to others on the thread, I wasn't even speaking to you in the first place.

I didnt say you called me that yes other posters have called me that.. read your own thread.

I meant- "no you haven't engaged with the op"

Does he know that it can kill him. Never mind you killing him? The DVLA take a dim view as well.

Oh sorry understood

Why does he not have a CPAP?

I wasn't correcting you. I was correcting others on the thread. There's so much spite on it for snorers and some horrible words have been used. And it's okay for me to challenge the assumption that we could all do something about it if we wanted to.

As I said, I DID do something. But there are now no new avenues to go down.

I honestly do understand how awful it is to try to sleep next to me. I'm resigned to never having another, even casual relationship. But it really isn't as simple for a lot of us, as "well just do something about it"

Thank you @saraclara

This is good to know as we like to go for an overnight the odd time to a hotel and it would be far more romantic without his machine lol

Why can't you get a better sleeping situation for the living room if you don't have a spare room?
lots of people do this as a solution.

I'm the snorer in my marriage. Went to GP about it almost a year ago and am undergoing tests for apnoea. I am very happy to sleep in another room and occasionally do but DH doesn't like us having separate rooms.

I have tried all sorts to improve it though, nasal dilators, nose strips, nasal sprays, throat strips, anti snoring pillows etc. I am a healthy weight but have also tried losing a bit of weight as well. DH also snores despite being underweight, but not as bad as I am.

It's not unreasonable to be pissed off at someone who tries nothing to improve the situation. I take the effect of my snoring on DH seriously, which is why I have sought help and take steps to improve things (it's also why I'm very happy to sleep in the spare room).

I also have bad asthma (consultant led care) and being asthmatic raises the risk of sleep apnoea.

This. ^