Did I do a one night stand wrong?! Getting ripped from my friends

[marrc]

My friends are currently laughing at my “failed” one night stand last night.

Very unlike me, but I met up with a guy yesterday at his place. I’ve come out of a LTR and definitely do not want a boyfriend, at all. I just wanted sex.

Anyway, he paid for me to get to his house for 3pm yesterday (friends thought the time was hilarious for some reason??), we talked for an hour or so and then had sex. After sex he said he’d like it if I stayed the night (I presume for further/morning sex). We watched a film, had sex and then spoke a bit longer. We got on well and had the same sense of humour so it wasn’t awkward or anything! Anyway, I left at around 11 this morning after staying the night (we didn’t have sex this morning, just cuddled).

friends feel I’ve done it wrong because:

1. I stayed the night? Apparently you should leave straight after the deed? (Not sure why this is weird - it’s nice to sleep next to someone and cuddle?)
2. We were laughing and talking (apparently this is “not boundaried”)
3. i arrived too early and should have gone around 10pm

Is there a rule book I’m missing out on?!? Was I a weirdo?? I thought I was being normal!

Did you feel comfortable all the time?
Did they feel comfortable all the time?

Then you did it right and your friends are dicks

Did you feel comfortable all the time?
Did they feel comfortable all the time?

Then you did it right and your friends are dicks

It was a One night stand….

it lasted One night.

tell your friends to piss off.

People who laugh at you arent friends.

They sound jealous to be fair.

Nah you're fine

Your friends sound a bit stupid.

A one night stand can be what your did or can be sex and out the door as you dress on the way or anything in between.

Really, they sound like teenagers whose only experience of this is from watching movies. Idiots.

What? Your friends a bizarre. Ignore them.

I sounds like a fun afternoon and night. Don't overthink it.

Screams jealously that you've had the confidence to go and meet a guy for sex and they are now laughing at you.

Your friends are weird. If you’re happy with how it went, their opinion is irrelevant.

They are being really weird. Do they think they are the rulekeepers for your sex life?

Not my cup of tea as evenings go, but you were safe, happy, had fun, all good. 👍

If you were in a bit of a vulnerable place that sort of day would be putting you into a prime position to fall into a situationship, but if you already knew what you wanted and definitely are happy with it being a one night thing then that’s fine.

I think your friends are weirder, particularly with point 2. I'd feel a) like a prostitute and b)wouldn't particularly enjoy the sex if it was literally rock up - pants down - stick it in - back home - sounds a bit clinical and crap. I enjoy things a lot more with a bit of chat/connection with the person - doesn't mean you have to have their whole life story but if you barely interact at all with them may as well just use a vibrator to get off. No issue with the film - have they never heard of 'netflix and chill?'

Staying over is completely normal, particularly if you'd had a drink, and often safer than getting a taxi or whatever on your own.

I suppose re: the time it is usually a one NIGHT stand, clue in the name, rather than an early afternoon stand, but who cares? Again they are being a bit prudish suggesting you can only shag at night in the dark!

Sounds like you had a great (and very normal!) time all in all!

It sounds perfect. Both of you were comfortable with the sex and the amount of time spent together.
Who asked the one night stand police, anyway?

But if you plan to have any more ONS, it might be an idea to establish what your partner expects, re time and activities, since you don't know what the ONS norm is, if there is one (and neither do I)

Sounds like you really like him, perhaps not a one night stand? Is that why your 'friends' think it amusing? Do what you want to do none of their business.

Your "friends" sound jelous and immature to me.

Who asked the one night stand police, anyway?

Exactly* *@Giggorata The idea that there is a 'correct' way to do a one night stand is kinda funny really.

There are as many ways to have sex as there are people in the world.

If it feels right for you then it's right.

I had a good time, and he’s a funny person, but I definitely don’t want to see him again. Definitely a one night stand, and I think that feeling was mutual.

This smacks of their own insecurities/jealousy/judgement. You’ll maybe know which is most likely but they aren’t great friends OP.

As long as you're happy with it, it's your call.

However, I can see their point. Their "rules" aren't necessary, but help keep the boundaries of one night of no-strings sex very clear. The way you did it, with companionship, a much longer time spent together, and cuddling, does leave one of you potentially much more open to being hurt if it makes you more emotionally invested, because you played it much more like you already had some emotional investment.

Sounds lovely. Friends sound wierd.

I must be getting old but why would you go to some random persons house????

Sounds like your friends like laughing at you, possibly because you are easy to wind up

Why did he pay for you to come over? That sounds more like he thought he was hiring an escort.

I think you did it right! It sounds like he was respectful and thought of you as a person rather than just a shag. Maybe they’re jealous?