To think I will be judged on holiday and plane about my size?

[Ykn]

40 something, 5.8 tall, size 20-22, hoping to feel confident enough to wear a bikini or tankini around the pool on my coming holiday.

Would you be judging me on how I look? Thinking "I'm glad I don't look like her" and/or "what on earth does she think she looks like?"

Would you be looking over at me on the plane to see if I can fasten my seat belt? To see if I have to ask for an extender? To see me become flustered if I can't fasten my seat belt and have to ask for an extender?

Interested to hear your honest thoughts.

Generally speaking, the vast majority of people will not look at you or notice. Other people are not that interesting. It is true though, that some places have a bigger mix of people, so it may vary just a little bit depending on location.

We inherited an apartment in a resort in Mallorca and so go there a lot. There are people there of all sizes and shapes letting it all hang out there. No one gives a flip and I never feel self-conscious, even though I'm a bit chubby myself.

I have seen much bigger people at the airport than you so presumably, they would sit next to others on planes without any issues. I noticed a guy ask for a seatbelt extended in the neighbouring aisle the last time I flew. i was surprised because I don't think he was that big but it was no big deal.

I carefully took my sarong on holiday based on the "never leaving sunbed without it". After a day I noticed most people - of all sizes - didn't wear them. Oh the sense of liberation!

I’d be cursing my terrible luck if I had to sit next to someone that was spreading into my seat. Other than that couldn’t give a shit. Ditto the belt extender. I’ve never noticed anyone ask for one, ever, and at one point I was flying once a month across the Midwest of America which is hardly an area known for its slim physiques.

I fly a fair bit and I find that heavier women tend to be more considerate about trying not to encroach into their neighbour's space than your average man is with his leg splaying.

Strangely the nearest I have ever come to needing an extender was an internal US flight.

I understand airlines do not like people to use their own extenders so do not waste your money.

Thanks everyone for your (mostly) helpful replies and support.

I thought I would update my post as we had a wonderful holiday and I WORE A BIKINI!! If anything I got some admiring looks, or perhaps they were pitiful, 'what does she think she looks like' looks, but I didn't care.

There was no need to worry about seatbelt extenders either. Only very slightly tight but did up easily.

If I even noticed you in your bikini because I'd be too busy looking inward at all my flaws, my first thought would be WOW, Go You!! (I'll be the one in the corner hiding under a parasol and several towels!)

I look for the positive in every person and always find it. I'm sure you will look fabulous. Have a great holiday.

Glad you had good hols.
I hope you can not care what others think in future.
You being large isn't offensive or contagious.

Glad you had a great time. I bet you looked amazing.

I’m afraid of flying, I don’t even see other passengers for the fear! But you have nothing to worry about.
And if you need an extender that’s fine, I was a size 18 when I last flew and I had to call for a seat belt extender- but turns out the belt had just been adjusted by previous passenger- the air hostess loudly exclaimed - this can’t be right! - and then spent a good few minutes tugging and adjusting it while I was sat there - it was embarrassing but honestly no one even looked round.

Thank you for taking the trouble to update us. Glad you had a great time.

Rubbish. At OPs height she will be quite unremarkable.

I'm 50 something. Size 22/24. I'm just back from palmanova. No one looked at me. I wore shorts and a bikini. Go for it!

What people think is of no consequence, just enjoy your holiday and sod them. Your size doesn't affect them in the slightest and size 20-22 really isn't that big anyway.

The only possible situation which I'd consider it someone else's right to complain or judge is when a very large person sits next to you on a plane. Seats are snug at the best of times and if you're spilling over into their space then that's just not okay. I can't imagine this is the case at your size (maybe on some of the very budget airlines with truly tiny seats perhaps I don't know?), but you need to make sure that you're going to fit in your assigned seat without impinging on your neighbour. I got stuck on a flight to New York once next to a very large lady and it was 6 hours of absolute, pure hell.

I wouldn’t be paying attention.
I’m too busy trying to get my iPad out, any other bits I may need etc, and trying to get comfortable myself.

I don’t think anyone on a plane really cares what the other passengers are doing.

enjoy your holiday x

No, because I’m a size 16-18 and so I’d be thinking either nothing or thoughts of solidarity. I wear a bikini if I want to.

My belly is the result of all my miscarriages and IVF rounds so it feels like a hardened battle scar of sorts. The judgement of shallow people is irrelevant.

Yay for the update. Told you noone would care!

I was a size 20/22 until the start of this year and have recently gone down to a 14-16, but I had the same worries as you pre and during holidays and still do as I am far from slim at my current size and carry much of my weight around my tummy, thighs and bottom. Thing is, a lot of people are varying degrees of overweight these days so statistically there will be many others in a similar position around you who are probably worrying that you will be judging them! Realistically, most people don’t notice and/or don’t care as they are too focused on what they are doing and their own problems. I second what other people have suggested about quietly asking for a seatbelt extender when you board the plane. Hold your head up high and enjoy your holiday!