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AIBU?

Neighbour has told our village I am a thief

419 replies

crazyneighbour123 · 24/03/2023 20:59

NC as obviously outing


Last night around 8:30pm a delivery driver asked me to take a parcel for a neighbour a few doors down and said he had knocked my door as my gate was open (all houses on my street have a gate and a pathway to the front door, roughly 20meters). The parcel was 2ft high and 2ft wide and heavy so I managed to push it along my hallway out of the way.

Here is the issue. At 6:50am there was banging and when I say banging I mean banging on my front door. I ran downstairs worried something was wrong and hoping it wouldn’t wake the whole house up.

It was my male neighbour who is in his 40s who didn’t bother to say hello only said where is my parcel. I explained it come last night let me get it. As I was pushing it down the hallway towards the door he said ‘ no need to be so dramatic there’s no need to pretend it’s too heavy that’s why you didn’t bother to bring it over last night, you just could not be bothered’ . I was shocked and just said how he wasn’t in thats why the deliver drive gave me the parcel and it is heavy. He then said he was in but was having his dinner and it was raining so didn’t answer the door and I should have had some respect and done the polite thing and taken the parcel to him. I started laughing as I thought he was joking. He then tried picking it up and realised how heavy it was and how far he had to go with it told me the least I can do is help him carry it back to his house I laughed and said I couldn’t. He then called me a waste of space. I then told him ‘ I hope there’s weights in that box cause you bloody well need them’ and shut the door.

He has now posted on the village Facebook (I know social media is the root of all evil) and has bad mouthed me and called me a thief and a chav and that everyone should be careful around me as I will try and take their deliveries to keep for myself. This is not true and unluckily for him I have this all recorded on the ring doorbell. You can hear us both word for word and see how angry he is in the video. Question is would I be unreasonable to post it onto the village Facebook group or should I just send it privately to the main admin person. My only issue with sending it privately which is the more mature option is the main admin owner walks her dogs with him so not sure if she would fully make the other members of the group aware of what actually happened? I could just try the private route first but it’s making me feel awkward going out today that everyone in the village thinks I’m a thief.

YANBU - post it on the Facebook group so the whole village will know the truth

YABU - send it only to the admin privately and hope she does the right thing

OP posts:
GrannyAchingsShepherdsHut · 24/03/2023 22:00

I also live in a small village with a hotbed of intrigue that is the local fb page.

You can either be 'isn't that the woman who nicked Dave's parcel?'

Or 'isn't that the woman that handed Dave his balls on a silver platter?'

I know which I'd rather be. Dave would be put straight back in his box. I'm sure everyone already knows he's a twat - confirming it is a public service, really. Grin

Antiquiteas · 24/03/2023 22:00

Antiquiteas · 24/03/2023 21:59

Definitely post it. Destroy the fucker. 😈

Or at least comment and threaten to share the real story via your doorbell footage. With a laughing face. That’ll make the twat sweat. 😈 (again)


(I’ve not actually read the whole thread yet. Too excited about swift revenge).

UniversalMamma · 24/03/2023 22:00

GrannyAchingsShepherdsHut · 24/03/2023 22:00

I also live in a small village with a hotbed of intrigue that is the local fb page.

You can either be 'isn't that the woman who nicked Dave's parcel?'

Or 'isn't that the woman that handed Dave his balls on a silver platter?'

I know which I'd rather be. Dave would be put straight back in his box. I'm sure everyone already knows he's a twat - confirming it is a public service, really. Grin

Yep 👆

TheLadyofShalott1 · 24/03/2023 22:01

Please post it on your own page @crazyneighbour123 unless you have real concerns for your safety - but he would obviously really have to be a very crazy neighbour if he harmed you or damaged your property, as he would surely be the person with the biggest motive, and therefore the main suspect?

I would love to think that if you went to the police they would talk to him, and at least advise him to withdraw his facebook post, and to issue a public apology on it, but in this day and age...
Having said that, I think maybe you should write down everything you told us, with copies of the two different doorbell videos, and take them by hand to the police station, and hamd them to the desk clerk.

I wonder how he knew to come to your house, I suppose the delibery driver must have then gone back to his house, and put a note in saying where he had left the "parcel", or did he ring the couriers depot up just after 6am to find out what they had done with his parcel? I feel sorry for the poor delivery driver if he then had to traipse back to the other house in the rain, just to deliver a note to the idiot! This isn't your problem OP, but I hope that whichever delivery service it was, end up blacklisting him.

💐 for you OP, I hope this all gets sorted satisfactorily, please let us know of any further developments.

Vegalam · 24/03/2023 22:02

These suggestions are all well and good however I would be worried about him becoming angry and him knowing where you live.

Cherryana · 24/03/2023 22:04

Look you want to de-escalate this situation. Not inflame it.

I do think the calmer approach of ‘I took your parcel in as a favour. I shall not do that in future’ comment on his post makes you look sane and him even more unhinged.

Thoughtful2355 · 24/03/2023 22:06

NOPE POST IT!!! You have to save your self

Paramummy3 · 24/03/2023 22:07

Post it

PurpleReindeer2 · 24/03/2023 22:08

TruJay · 24/03/2023 21:02

You could comment and ask if he’d like to retract his untruthful slanderous comment or he’d like you to post your ring camera video for people to see what actually happened?

☝️this

Antiquiteas · 24/03/2023 22:08

Vegalam · 24/03/2023 22:02

These suggestions are all well and good however I would be worried about him becoming angry and him knowing where you live.

And then the Ring doorbell will pay for itself all over again.

Yarboosucks · 24/03/2023 22:08

and then I would post that I had reported him to the police along with the video evidence

Antiquiteas · 24/03/2023 22:08

Cherryana · 24/03/2023 22:04

Look you want to de-escalate this situation. Not inflame it.

I do think the calmer approach of ‘I took your parcel in as a favour. I shall not do that in future’ comment on his post makes you look sane and him even more unhinged.

You don’t live in a village, do you?

clairelouwho · 24/03/2023 22:09
On Fire Burn GIF by Us

Since he's outright accused of being a thief when you did him a favour and he's so rude and ungrateful, post it. Don't think twice about it. Post the delivery footage as well so it clears away any doubt.

You have every right to defend yourself from accusations like that when they're totally unfounded. How bloody rude and unreasonable is he? He can't be arsed to answer the door in the rain for his OWN parcel but expects you to lug a heavy parcel to him in the rain?

Post it and watch him go down in flames. Then everyone will really know what kind of person he is and never take a parcel in for him again.

crazyneighbour123 · 24/03/2023 22:10

I’ve unblocked him and commented saying ‘I think there’s been a misunderstanding. I accepted the parcel from the delivery driver because you were apparently eating dinner. I didn’t bring the parcel over to you immediately last night in the rain but I didn’t think you were in and I couldn’t lift it and you could barely pick it up yourself that’s why you asked for my help to take it back to your house at 6:50am this morning remember? I can post the doorbell footage here or I’m happy to accept your apology and move on’

and now I'm checking to see if he has responded which he hasn't but my neighbour next door has 'loved' the post so we shall see

OP posts:
sadeyedladyofthelowlandsea · 24/03/2023 22:10

I suggest two things, because he does sound unhinged. First, reply to his post, saying 'Sorry John, there appears to be some confusion about this? I'm happy to share the ring footage here if it helps clarify things for everyone.' Then contact the admin of the group and say that you feel his post should not have been permitted as it is a) a personal attack, and b) you can prove it is entirely untrue.

It sounds bloody horrible though. I think most people will be able to see through it, but I hope you're ok.

Antiquiteas · 24/03/2023 22:11

TruJay · 24/03/2023 21:02

You could comment and ask if he’d like to retract his untruthful slanderous comment or he’d like you to post your ring camera video for people to see what actually happened?

Swap out ‘slanderous’ for ‘libellous’ and then this could be a fun way to go…

The post it anyway, via a post on your own page that is made public.

AppallinglyReheated · 24/03/2023 22:11

Aye, bad news travels far faster than good. Him just removing his post having privately been told about the video will do your reputation no good.

You posting the video and...

'Here's what really happened from my Ring doorbell camera, I suggest you answer your door to delivery people in future as if they knock at mine I'll be telling them you moved to Outer Mongolia in the hopes they take your parcel away again!'

Swannning · 24/03/2023 22:11

Very measured response OP - I would have been tempted to make sure he got a proper roasting but that would not have de-escalated things, whereas you have handled it well

AppallinglyReheated · 24/03/2023 22:12

Oops hit reply too soon... 'will spread like wildfire round the village and he will be outed for the ridiculous prick he is!

EmmaEmerald · 24/03/2023 22:13

crazyneighbour123 · 24/03/2023 22:10

I’ve unblocked him and commented saying ‘I think there’s been a misunderstanding. I accepted the parcel from the delivery driver because you were apparently eating dinner. I didn’t bring the parcel over to you immediately last night in the rain but I didn’t think you were in and I couldn’t lift it and you could barely pick it up yourself that’s why you asked for my help to take it back to your house at 6:50am this morning remember? I can post the doorbell footage here or I’m happy to accept your apology and move on’

and now I'm checking to see if he has responded which he hasn't but my neighbour next door has 'loved' the post so we shall see

Nicely done.

sadeyedladyofthelowlandsea · 24/03/2023 22:13

Gah, cross post! Sounds as though your other NDN has got your back though.

piedbeauty · 24/03/2023 22:14

Well done, op!

He's an entitled arsehole. Wtf was he thinking? And what kind of dickhead ignores the doorbell just because they are eating??

Yarboosucks · 24/03/2023 22:16

Please tell me that you have taken a screenshot!! I cannot for the life of me think why you are so calm. I live in a village and so I completely get the dynamics and the issues that such a post can cause. You have been called a thief when you did him a favour.

cadink · 24/03/2023 22:17

This is slander and you can sue or get a legal letter to remove it. Screenshot it so you have evidence

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