Neighbour has told our village I am a thief

[crazyneighbour123]

NC as obviously outing


Last night around 8:30pm a delivery driver asked me to take a parcel for a neighbour a few doors down and said he had knocked my door as my gate was open (all houses on my street have a gate and a pathway to the front door, roughly 20meters). The parcel was 2ft high and 2ft wide and heavy so I managed to push it along my hallway out of the way.

Here is the issue. At 6:50am there was banging and when I say banging I mean banging on my front door. I ran downstairs worried something was wrong and hoping it wouldn’t wake the whole house up.

It was my male neighbour who is in his 40s who didn’t bother to say hello only said where is my parcel. I explained it come last night let me get it. As I was pushing it down the hallway towards the door he said ‘ no need to be so dramatic there’s no need to pretend it’s too heavy that’s why you didn’t bother to bring it over last night, you just could not be bothered’ . I was shocked and just said how he wasn’t in thats why the deliver drive gave me the parcel and it is heavy. He then said he was in but was having his dinner and it was raining so didn’t answer the door and I should have had some respect and done the polite thing and taken the parcel to him. I started laughing as I thought he was joking. He then tried picking it up and realised how heavy it was and how far he had to go with it told me the least I can do is help him carry it back to his house I laughed and said I couldn’t. He then called me a waste of space. I then told him ‘ I hope there’s weights in that box cause you bloody well need them’ and shut the door.

He has now posted on the village Facebook (I know social media is the root of all evil) and has bad mouthed me and called me a thief and a chav and that everyone should be careful around me as I will try and take their deliveries to keep for myself. This is not true and unluckily for him I have this all recorded on the ring doorbell. You can hear us both word for word and see how angry he is in the video. Question is would I be unreasonable to post it onto the village Facebook group or should I just send it privately to the main admin person. My only issue with sending it privately which is the more mature option is the main admin owner walks her dogs with him so not sure if she would fully make the other members of the group aware of what actually happened? I could just try the private route first but it’s making me feel awkward going out today that everyone in the village thinks I’m a thief.

YANBU - post it on the Facebook group so the whole village will know the truth

YABU - send it only to the admin privately and hope she does the right thing

[Aubree17]

And I definitely wouldn't post the footage.

[thelionthewitchtheaudacityofTHISbitch]

I think your response was fine. It was polite, measured and doesnt escalate. But of course next time there is a delivery of his and the courier knocks on the door - you know what to say.

I had that recently - different neighbour issues - but I just said no that number's not mine, try over there. Which (to be fair to cf neighbour) was in their rough direction. But imprecise enough to not be helpful to the courier (i hope it never got delivered). It is not my issue if my neighbours do not leave precise delivery instructions. They are the cf's who had takeaway deliveries at 11pm the other month and couldnt give proper delivery instructions. #notmyproblemanymore

[Scousefab]

To be honest I have found with manipulative people there is a good way of dealing with them. Ignore them! I think anyone with any real intelligence will realise he’s a complete liar! The more attention you give to this weirdo it feeds it. Take the moral high ground and if people ask you have the video as proof x I would make sure you never take any parcels in again x explain to the delivery drivers why too x

[Teatime55]

Twat. I’d also put on FB you aren’t a delivery service so he needs to come and pick his own bloody parcels up.
Obviously next time someone knocks you won’t take one for him anyway.

[DaSilvaP]

Do not rush.

Have a chat with Carter-Ruck first, before posting anything.

He seems to be stupid enough to have incriminated himself to the hilt.

Diffamation is no laughing matter, if you do it right he will have to sell the house to pay the costs of the libel lawsuit - so as an added bonus you'll get rid of this nasty piece of work.

[ellamar1]

I would post it he is a bully and others in the village need to see it.

[butterfliedtwo]

@TruJay

You could comment and ask if he’d like to retract his untruthful slanderous comment or he’d like you to post your ring camera video for people to see what actually happened?

Do this.

[Sandra1984]

And that's why unless I know the person well and we have a good relationship I don't take any parcels. I know someone who took a parcel for a neighbour and almost got arrested because it was hash. Before you do a favour to anyone make sure you know the person and he/she is the civilised type. This man would never take a parcel for you so don't be gullible.

[WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll]

Nicely handled, OP.

If you wanted to, you could start a totally new 'innocent' post - not linked to his - warning people to be careful when taking in parcels for neighbours, as you had a nasty experience, as seen in the doorbell footage. No need to name him as everybody who clicked on it (and they all would) would clearly see that it was 'John' and egg and his face would be completely in alignment.

In general, I have a theory that people who make outrageous accusations, when others have clearly done nothing of the sort, do so because it's the kind of thing that they would have done. Because he would have taken the opportunity to steal the parcel and deny all knowledge if/when the neighbour comes for it, he assumes that everybody else is as dishonest and disgraceful as he is.

I'll never understand people who order parcels and then go out of their way to avoid the delivery person being able to get the parcel to them. Does it not occur to them that there's a really clever trick to ensure that nobody will come to your door with an unwanted parcel for you: don't order one?!

That said, though, I do wonder if some people might deliberately engineer it so that their parcel doesn't come directly to them, making it easier to claim it never arrived/got lost/must have been stolen and then demand a refund, even though they do have their order safe and sound.

[DaSilvaP]

@ellamar1

I would post it he is a bully and others in the village need to see it.

Yes, social media is a minefield - this idiot just stepped on one.

[WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll]

Interesting how he couldn't be arsed to stand inside his own door to receive his parcel, because it was raining; but the least that you should apparently have done would be to haul somebody else's parcel several doors away in that same rain.

[misslooloo]

And that’s libel. Tell him so.

[billybear]

my god the cheek of the man,fancy knocking on your door that early for his parcel.im fuming for you,i would post a piece on laocal facebook page,stating what happened , and say you have the ring doorbell as evidence demanding a full apology in the very least off the man

[SeekChase]

@TruJay

You could comment and ask if he’d like to retract his untruthful slanderous comment or he’d like you to post your ring camera video for people to see what actually happened?

This ⬆️

[Ofcourseshecan]

Start your own post, with the evidence. You don’t want people to think you’re just bluffing.

Yanbu. I'd post it as PP says, not as a comment on his posting where it won't be so noticeable. And I hope this doesn't deter you from continuing to be the good neighbour you clearly are (to your other neighbours -- I wouldn't bother for him any more).

[Optimist1]

@TruJay

You could comment and ask if he’d like to retract his untruthful slanderous comment or he’d like you to post your ring camera video for people to see what actually happened?

Perfect

[DaSilvaP]

@misslooloo

And that’s libel. Tell him so.

No point in doing so.
Let Carter-Ruck inform him in writing.
I'm all for being nice to people - as long as they're are nice.
This idiot was so self-centered and arrogant that he left a clear trail of open defamation and slander, probably under his full name! He just stepped on a mine called English libel laws and deserves to feel the consequences.

[saraclara]

So many people who haven't read OP's update...!

Anyway, nicely done, OP. The admins of my local FB groups wouldn't have allowed you to post the video on the groups anyway. Though now I think of it, they wouldn't have allowed his post in the first place. Naming and shaing isn't allowed, nor are identifying photos or videos. You did the right thing.

[SchoolTripDrama]

@ManipulatorPedipulator Actually yes it is! It shows how many each post is 'seen' by. Please don't accuse me of lying without knowing the facts

[IntheJingelyJangelyJungle]

I live in a smallish village with a social media group.

I only ever look at FB (maybe once a week?) to see what drama-Rama is going on… and generally have a chuckle at who’s driveway motion camera caught who not picking up dog poop (disgusting beggars- that’s a genuine judgement btw…)

Honestly? I’d rise about his unhinged madness and say nothing. Just literally don’t react at all. Hold your dignity, ignore his rant ago the vast VAST majority of people looking at the group will roll their eyes at his rant, consider it mildly entertaining drama and really not give it a second thought after.

If you start a social media interaction/ war it’ll all just escalate and you’ll look as fighty and unreasonable as him. You can’t argue with stupid.

Consider him un un salvageable knob, don’t get dragged down to his level, it’ll be yesterdays metaphorical chip paper.

[ManipulatorPedipulator]

@SchoolTripDrama

@ManipulatorPedipulator Actually yes it is! It shows how many each post is 'seen' by. Please don't accuse me of lying without knowing the facts

I didn’t say you were lying. I said you didn’t know what I was talking about. You clearly don’t.

[SchoolTripDrama]

@ManipulatorPedipulator I do know what you're talking about and what I'm talking about thank you very much! Don't be so bloody rude!

[ManipulatorPedipulator]

@SchoolTripDrama

@ManipulatorPedipulator I do know what you're talking about and what I'm talking about thank you very much! Don't be so bloody rude!

Obviously not, or you’d know that your response made no sense in relation to what I said. I tried not being rude, you kept coming at me and insisting I’m wrong because you don’t understand how Facebook algorithms work. How many times am I supposed to have you incorrectly tell me that I’m wrong before I’m allowed to say you don’t know what you’re on about? Why is it rude for me to (correctly) say you don’t know what you’re talking about if you think it’s fine for you to (incorrectly) say that I don’t?

[SchoolTripDrama]

@ManipulatorPedipulator What was that you were saying?!

[SchoolTripDrama]

@ManipulatorPedipulator How embarrassing for you