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AIBU?

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Original poster

To be fucked off that DH ate my leftovers

246 replies

CatLoaf · 24/03/2023 19:52

I had an amazing dinner last night, steak platter with friends. It came with bubble and squeak, fab chips...piles of it, and we couldn't finish it. I checked with the others if they were OK with me taking the leftovers home, and was so so looking forward to them tonight. DH (a 'flexitarian' who tries not to eat meat), just told me he ate it for lunch.

I am so so pissed off, and I KNOW I should have expressly told him not to eat it if that's what I wanted. But I'm 6 months pregnant, hormonal, and when he told me I just saw red. Totally overreacted and told him I was really pissed off with him. Then went into our bedroom and had a scream into a pillow. I know, pathetic. Then I told him he could sort his own dinner out.

Now he's taken his coat and backpack and gone out, saying he can't stay here atm. It's completely blown up and I feel horrible. Currently sitting in the dark in DD's room. I hate this

OP posts:
IkeNoNo · 24/03/2023 20:13

Why didn't he even fucking ask'

Boobahs · 24/03/2023 20:13

No, no, no. It's common courtesy to check with the other person what the plans are for a meal that suddenly appears in the fridge. I wouldn't just eat up a load of leftovers that I didn't know the plan for, so why should he? Selfish and rude.

coffeecupsandwaxmelts · 24/03/2023 20:13

I'd be really pissed off if DH ate my leftovers and I'm not even pregnant Grin

ChateauxNeufDePoop · 24/03/2023 20:13

TokenGinger · 24/03/2023 20:11

I'd be really pissed off. It's not about needing permission to eat something from the fridge, it's about eating something which is very obviously yours. If DP has bought himself something/has leftovers, I wouldn't dream of eating it, knowing he'd have planned to have it for a meal and so it'd leave him short.

I baked brownies last week. He despises chocolate orange. I saved myself one chocolate orange brownie and made treat boxes for my mum and friends for Mother's Day so gave the rest away. Saved him two Mars bar brownies, his favourite. I came down the next morning to my brownie in the bin. He didn't know it was chocolate orange (despite it had a big segment of chocolate fucking orange on top) and he'd microwaved it, didn't like it, so chucked it. I was irrationally pissed off with that, too. If he'd have applied a bit of sense and looked at the decoration on top, he'd have known which was mine!

But it's not obviously hers as demonstrated by the responses.

ManipulatorPedipulator · 24/03/2023 20:14

TokenGinger · 24/03/2023 20:11

I'd be really pissed off. It's not about needing permission to eat something from the fridge, it's about eating something which is very obviously yours. If DP has bought himself something/has leftovers, I wouldn't dream of eating it, knowing he'd have planned to have it for a meal and so it'd leave him short.

I baked brownies last week. He despises chocolate orange. I saved myself one chocolate orange brownie and made treat boxes for my mum and friends for Mother's Day so gave the rest away. Saved him two Mars bar brownies, his favourite. I came down the next morning to my brownie in the bin. He didn't know it was chocolate orange (despite it had a big segment of chocolate fucking orange on top) and he'd microwaved it, didn't like it, so chucked it. I was irrationally pissed off with that, too. If he'd have applied a bit of sense and looked at the decoration on top, he'd have known which was mine!

You weren’t irrationally pissed off. You were completely and totally rationally pissed off by that.

Bookworm333 · 24/03/2023 20:15

YANBU - I'd be annoyed too (irrespective of being pregnant or not). I mean he could have checked first. I'd do that especially if it was something DH bought home from somewhere else and a bit more "special". And him stomping off and leaving is outrageous - nice way of gaslighting you and getting a night out mate - he should say sorry, you were looking forward to eating that!

Albiboba · 24/03/2023 20:15

This just seems like a massive overreaction of on your part which sparked a big argument.
Screaming into a pillow over some leftovers?
Ridiculous.
Being pregnant doesn’t have anything to do with it.
It’s a bit annoying if you were expecting to eat it but equally it would have been really easy to say you had put your leftovers in the fridge and were planning to eat them.

Antiquiteas · 24/03/2023 20:15

I actually don’t think you have to much to apologise for. Assuming you didn’t actually punch him in the face, of course. You’re pregnant, you’re requested the leftovers, he’s supposed to be veggie, it’s fairly fucking obvious you wanted them, but he thought only of himself and ate the lot. And now he’s fucked off for the night.

When I was seven months pregnant my husband went out to get curry and came back, half cut, without any of mine because he ‘forgot’ . I was fucking raging, he was not apologetic either, offered me some of his overly spicy one, which made me feel sick and acidy, and I went to bed with a digestive biscuit and the absolute hump. I’ve still not really forgiven him.

ManipulatorPedipulator · 24/03/2023 20:15

ChateauxNeufDePoop · 24/03/2023 20:13

But it's not obviously hers as demonstrated by the responses.

Show quote history

Unless he thinks food magically appears in their fridge, how could he not have thought it was hers? Other posters being cheeky snafflers too doesn’t mean he didn’t know it was hers!

Paq · 24/03/2023 20:16

YANBU. He's rude and selfish.

Ketchupwee · 24/03/2023 20:16

TokenGinger · 24/03/2023 20:11

I'd be really pissed off. It's not about needing permission to eat something from the fridge, it's about eating something which is very obviously yours. If DP has bought himself something/has leftovers, I wouldn't dream of eating it, knowing he'd have planned to have it for a meal and so it'd leave him short.

I baked brownies last week. He despises chocolate orange. I saved myself one chocolate orange brownie and made treat boxes for my mum and friends for Mother's Day so gave the rest away. Saved him two Mars bar brownies, his favourite. I came down the next morning to my brownie in the bin. He didn't know it was chocolate orange (despite it had a big segment of chocolate fucking orange on top) and he'd microwaved it, didn't like it, so chucked it. I was irrationally pissed off with that, too. If he'd have applied a bit of sense and looked at the decoration on top, he'd have known which was mine!

Fuck that, I'd only be making chocolate orange brownies from now on

gamerchick · 24/03/2023 20:16

Yeah spot the cheeky buggers who just help themselves on this thread...

ChiefWiggumsBoy · 24/03/2023 20:17

That would piss me off too. In our house the rule is that leftovers belong to the person that ordered it - you don't touch it without express permission!

(This rule was created after a similar incident!)

Dragonwagon · 24/03/2023 20:17

He knows they're your leftovers, he should have just asked. Sure you could have told him but you didn't know he was planning on helping himself anyway. Does he often storm out? Very unappealing. In the scheme of things sure the dinner thing isn't that wild, but him heading out is pathetic.

Isthisexpected · 24/03/2023 20:18

He didn't go out with friends. They were obviously not his leftovers.

But I'd be more worried about him storming out of the house at your daughter's bedtime leaving you to it.

Meandfour · 24/03/2023 20:18

SunshineGeorgie · 24/03/2023 19:59

Poor bloke

Don't blame him for leaving tbh

This. You screamed into a pillow because your DH ate food from the fridge? Jesus.

SwordToFlamethrower · 24/03/2023 20:18

Never take a mama bear's dinner!!!

He is in the wrong.

TheChosenTwo · 24/03/2023 20:19

Food that’s in our fridge is fair game in our house unless someone has expressly conveyed otherwise. Dd got a takeaway the other night and said to us she was taking the leftovers to college the next day. So everyone knew not to eat it.
screaming into a pillow over it is a bit of an overreaction, pregnant or not pregnant - can you order a takeaway or something else that you fancy?

FurAndFeathers · 24/03/2023 20:19

ChateauxNeufDePoop · 24/03/2023 20:09

Sorry, upset as you are but I think YABU. It was food in the fridge that you hadn't told him to leave alone or to at least not eat all of.

Why would you tell a vegetarian not to eat a steak platter ?

DannyZukosSmile · 24/03/2023 20:19

Offensiveapprently · 24/03/2023 20:11

Of all the things to rage about.... this ain't it 😕

Yeah this. There's a 'greedy husband' thread on here every few days now. Bit weird. Confused He ate my leftovers. RAGE! Angry REALLY? Hmm

Reddickyouless · 24/03/2023 20:20

FurAndFeathers · 24/03/2023 20:19

Why would you tell a vegetarian not to eat a steak platter ?

Show quote history

Indeed
He was out of order

Seasidemumma77 · 24/03/2023 20:22

I share my fridge with teenage/young adult dc and my dp. Anything not for sharing has a post-it-note firmly attached, saves many arguments.

bubbles2023 · 24/03/2023 20:23

I'd be raging too. It was your leftover food from a meal out, not leftovers from a family meal cooked at home. There's a difference.

Antiquiteas · 24/03/2023 20:23

There’s some very forgiving women mugs on this thread. 😬

Ontopofthesunset · 24/03/2023 20:24

But I can't imagine that anyone in my household (husband and two now adult sons) would eat something that had clearly come home from my meal out without asking me. They just wouldn't. And vice versa. If I saw a doggie bag in the fridge from a meal I hadn't been at, I wouldn't eat it without asking if it was OK. In fact, if there's ever anything a bit unusual in the fridge (prawns, crab, pate rather than cheese, ham, salad etc), my family ask if it's meant for a particular meal or recipe before eating it.

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