DH ate extra lasagne and didn’t tell me

[Lolabear38]

I’m currently at home with 2 poorly DCs. We are all getting cabin fever so I may be over reacting a little here.

Yesterday I made a big lasagne for our tea. We had it with salad, corn on the cob and garlic bread so it was a substantial meal. There was enough leftover for us to have tonight (planned). I said as much to DH and he said ok fine, he said liked it a lot so was happy to have it again tonight.

I went to bed before DH last night and, unbeknown to me, he had another portion of the lasagne and didn’t say anything to me. Normally not an issue but as I said I was planning on us having it tonight too.

Today has been a hard day with the kids but I thought ‘oh at least dinner is sorted’ except when I went to get the lasagne I was bloody annoyed to see we were one portion down! I hadn’t looked at it all day today as when I put it in the fridge last night there was plenty.

DH was working later tonight so DC and I ate before he got home. I considered giving everyone a smaller portion but then I thought, f$&@ it, we’re having a normal portion and DH can have whatever is left, which is a lot less than he usually would have. He’s now home and very annoyed and thinks I’m selfish and somehow food shaming him for eating the extra last night. He said I should have left him enough, but as far as I’m concerned I did last night!

There is plenty of bread/ baked beans etc. for him to make himself something else but AIBU to be annoyed and not to have left him enough tonight?

That is a selfish arsehole reaction.
NB I have never used language like that on MN before. I am furious for you.

YANBU if he's tired he can make omelette and brea/brioche veg dinner sorted. Hope tomorrow i easier for you.

You are definitely NOT being unreasonable!

He knew it was earmarked for tonight's dinner - he just chose to eat his portion early.

There is no way you and your children should go without/with less because he couldn't control his greed.

He chose to eat his yesterday! What was he expecting to happen?!

FFS, what a dick. I hope he isn't usually such a selfish arsehole.

Totally reasonable for the family to eat normal portions and he makes himself something else.

YANBU - I'd decided what I'd have done before reading the end of your message. Turns out I'd have done exactly the same and have just left whatever was not wanted (as opposed to a specific portion for him).

I suppose it would've been nicer to give him a heads up so he could've sorted something extra out for himself by nipping to the shop or something on the way home though. I don't think I'd have thought to do that at the time though, not if I was stressed and hungry after a day looking after 2 poorly kids.

I admire you !!!
he had tonight’s portion last night

This

YANBU. I wouldn’t be annoyed that he’d eaten his, I’d have done exactly the same as you have tonight. It isn’t worth being angry or worked up over, but I wouldn’t be making him an alternative either. He ate his tea last night, this is his own problem.

It was his choice to eat his share last night, in the full knowledge that was his tea for tonight, so 🤷‍♀️

Food greed is really unattractive and I’d be pissed off too. He chose to have his serving last night. He doesn’t get another one. Especially if it meant his kids would go hungry.

Haha what a man child. Yanbu! I would have dished up for everyone and messaged him that he need to sort himself out because a portion is missing 😂

I'm astonished he had the nerve to be affronted! So he thinks you and the kids should have had a teeny portion so he could have a normal large portion, is that right? Food shamed him my arse! He food shamed himself, the greedy gannet!

Good for you.

And why didn’t he tell you, did he genuinely forget?

Good on you OP! What a stupid reaction from him.

Would he have preferred you and the children to get less while he gets extra just because he chose to have more last night He's absolutely terrible, not for eating the extra portion, but for getting so mad at you. Eating the extra portion I could get by if he said sorry and didn't complain for getting less food but he's being a right pain there calling you selfish when you're really just being fair.

What did he think would happen when he ate his portion last night? That it would grow back? 🙄 He obviously expected you/kids to go without or you to make him something else, neither of which are nice of him.

If he’d told you he’d eaten more then maybe you’d have had time to plan around his having eaten his share already. As it is, tough titty.

He said I should have left him enough,

So where did he expect this to come from? He expected someone else to not have their portion so he could have 'enough' to ight did he?

Yeah he's a greedy selfish individual who needs to learn some self control - or at.least the consequences of not having... which I guess he started to learn tonight!

YANBU. It's not like you stuffed yourself and overfed the children to make a point; there were a total of eight portions and when five were eaten the first day it only left three for today. It sounds like you did leave him some, he just may have to supplement if it's not enough.

He had a heads up, he knew he ate it!

YANBU at all

He knew he ate his!

Did he expect someone else to go without enough, or did he expect you to cook again?

You 100% did the right thing. Everyone had 2 portions, he chose to have most of his second one last night! If he dared to say you should have left him enough I'd have told him the only way to have done that was to give less to his children and tell him he has two options.

1. He tells you outright he wants you not to adequately feed his children because of his greed.
2. He will he be dealing with the consequences of his actions without any further complaint.

He thinks you should all have eaten a smaller dinner so that he got more. How selfish.