DSS Brought random girl home

[HappyMothersDayLadiesofMN]

DSS 17 is away college
Come home for the weekend as usual and went out drinking. At 2.30 made an almighty racket coming in drunk which woke us up
After 15 minutes we could hear him having sex. He'd brought a girl home.
After 30 minutes of this they came out of the room to the bathroom next to my bedroom giggling. By now I was bloody annoyed so I jumped out of bed and went out of the room. He's in his boxers she's naked going into the bathroom.
I told him to keep it down and that they were taking the piss. He apologised and said they were going to bed. I said I've heard you "being in bed" for the last half an hour.
We have no idea who this girl is. AIBU to be cheesed off. I found it massively disrespectful, not only did they wake us up which happens a lot when he goes out but to bring a strange girl home and have noisy sex then walk around undressed outside our room. What if DH had gone to speak to them. My DD was in bed in the room next to them too.

Is this acceptable for teenage boys?

Awful. It's disgusting he's allowed to do any of that.

Maybe it's because I have girls but I think there's a big difference between letting them have boyfriends/girlfriends stay and bringing home random hook ups.
It shows a lack of respect and boundaries need to be laid.

I did lots of fun things when I was 17. That didn’t include going out and getting pissed, bringing back a bit of strange to my parents house and noisily shagging their brains out with the whole house listening. And then walking round bollock naked post-sex for my parents to see. And then laughing about it. That’s fucking appalling behaviour from anyone, but clearly we have different standards. If it’s so nice and fun and normal then why is the op complaining about it?

What if DH had gone to speak to them.

Has he never seen a naked woman before?

That’s not what I said though?

I don’t agree with the stranger in my home or the sex in the slightest!

The going out and getting pissed with my mates at 17, yep I think this is fine

A naked teenage girl?

What’s the difference?

My teen still has to be in when the street lights come on. Or not long after. He still has teddy's on his bed though. I'd have a heart attack and phone the police thinking he was dead if he was still out at 2am.

You made yourself look like a dick here tbh 😄

Can't you read?

There was a thread last week where lots of people were supporting an OP who wouldn’t let her 19 year old DDs boyfriend stay in her room the night before they went on holiday together!

Your teen? As that covers 13 to 19, I'm not sure what relevance this has.

He's just turned 16 🤣 I was a nightmare at that age but he's so good. He's autistic though and doesn't overly enjoy being out socialising.

I would say, you're welcome home every weekend but can you save the late nights and drinking for while you're away at college please because we don't all want waking up in the middle of the night by you every time you come home.

Actually scrub that, get his bloody father to tell him, why are you the one dealing with all this?

Oh my god. This is horrible

@HappyMothersDayLadiesofMN morning and happy mothers day! What a way to bring on the days festivities???

I think you're being very reasonable. I'd be livid. Have a chat with him and reset the boundaries as pp said a courtesy text should be in place along with some house rules.

It's also a positive thing that he feels safe and confident enough to come home drunk and with someone. In my teen years Id be in some unknowns basement or camped on a couch somewhere. Hiding and lying about what I was doing.

Keep the honesty and trust open. Just reaffirm boundaries and respect.

I'd rather know my kid was home safe and exactly where he is rather than wondering if he was safe.

I would be really annoyed having someone walking around drunk and naked in my home.

This doesn’t sound so bad to some posters because she’s a female but if this was a random drunk, naked man and you had younger DCs, posters would be hitting the roof.

It is not acceptable and I’d be telling him so.
Whats done is done though and so I wouldn’t let it consume the day.
Sometimes teens have to act like idiots to learn a lesson.

Just to clarify he didn't laugh after I spoke to
Him. It was the giggling on the landing that got me out of bed. DH didn't realise I was getting up I just went. He has no issue parenting but he's my child too so I had no issue speaking to him.
We will be telling him that we don't want strangers in the house without warning, though I'm not sure a warning makes a difference to me. I don't want him having one night stands here, it's disrespectful to the girls and our home.
DH will be leading the convo later, Im sure DSS will be mortified. I want him to enjoy being his age cos I had a bloody great time but to respect everyone else involved too.

He has. Probably not a teenage girl in many years however. I think it would be very embarrassing for her and DH would have been horrified

Yes, not a great position for DH to be in.

Although the age of consent is 16, vulnerable children is under 18. This applies to nude photos on phones etc

If the girl is under 18 and anything came up whether relating to DSS or DH, social services would be knocking on OP’s door.

Hardly the point!

Op he's a disrespectful scrote. Tell him to shape up or move out.

I think you need to have a chat about condoms too. Maybe evidence of an empty wrapper!

I'm far from prudish or whatever but no way would DS be bringing one night stands to my house at 17 years old, or ever, and shagging loudly with his (non existent as yet) little sister in the next room.

Bang out of order. Bring your girlfriend over and have quiet sex all you like. But you do not bring strangers into my house and wake us all up listening to you shag.

Also, why the hell are you cooking dinner on mother's day? Fuck that.

No, they really wouldn’t.

And unless he was going to be taking photos of the girl during their random chance encounter on the landing, the police wouldn’t be interested either.

That’s appalling, and he’s not even an adult yet. Tbh I’d have been knocking on his door as soon as the noise started and probably would have driven her home myself. Quiet stay over with girlfriend you’d met and agreed to-fine, drunken noisy hook up with a random- so not fine!