To not know what I want my title to be?

[KeithBurtons]

Divorced 6 years, kept surname but don't really want to be known as Mrs any more. I'd like to put some distance between my marriage and who I am now but my options are limited:

Mrs- presumption that I am married or widowed
Miss- presumption that I've never been married
Ms- presumption that I'm divorced (I know that this theoretically is the option that doesn't tell the reader anything about marital status but a straw poll of 15 friends tells me that nobody knows a woman who has never been married that uses Ms, all the Ms they know are divorced)

Mx- suggests nothing about marital status but presumption that I am transgender.

I don't want to be Mrs Burtons any more but none of the other options are any better really- I'm sort of erring towards Miss but why should my title give any indication of my marital status? It really feels completely irrelevant and it's pissing me right off. On the other hand, if it is irrelevant why do I want to get away from being Mrs so much??

YABU- you're overthinking this
YANBU- I can see why you're annoyed

I have Miss, Ms, Mrs depending on the circumstance.
Don’t really care what anyone uses at all. Tend to use Ms if using my maiden name (work), and Mrs if I’m using my married name.

I speak to a lot of people daily and have to ask for title and would say Ms is a lot more common now
I don't think anything much about it when they give it except "nice, it's way more in use"

I've been Ms ever since I was 18 and so are most of my friends including many of the married ones. Never been married or divorced. My partner and I are about to do a civil partnership. I plan to stay Ms whatever happens.

Alternative is you go get yourself a professional title to use instead! Dr, Prof, Reverend, Saint, Honorable, Lord, Dame. I'm sure with some imagination you could aquire one 😂. Going to the effort of getting a PhD is probably a bit far to avoid a title issue but I'm sure you can buy some land for a lordship or convince people to worship you instead.

I went down that route, and call myself Mrs, even though I'm divorced.

It's easier than having to stop people from telling me about their medical complaints.

I think Bishop Bums Wombat has a nice ring to it. The Cof E has some rather good titles which don’t denote sex ( unlike the RC Church ) Canon, Archbishop, Bishop, Reverend ……..

I was a Ms before I married, and I’m still a Ms now- come join us! Be enigmatic and prevent salesmen from profiling you based on your marital status!

I've always been a Ms, single married and single again.

I refuse to tick divorced ever. The legal ending of a marriage is of no business to my status as single.

I use Miss, always have because I like the way it sounds with my last name, never given it any more thought than that.
You are overthinking it a bit, nobody else will care what your title is. I couldn't tell you what any of my friends use apart from the one with a doctorate - and thats just because thats a cool one.

Encourage everyone just to refer you by name and surname.

Ms is exactly what you’re looking for in that it is just a title for an adult woman irrespective of marital status.

I’ve never been married (although it’s often presumed) and I’ve been a Ms since I was about 20.

I'm married and I kept my last name. I've never been a Mrs. I switch between ms and miss with impunity. I honestly don't get why you care so much. People aren't that interested in other peoples minutiae.

I'm a married Ms, we've been married for 30 years and I've always been Ms.

1. Is this really a big deal? I think the only time I'm asked what my title is is when I'm booking a flight, in which case I use Ms. because who cares?
2. I do get called Mrs. Last Name occasionally when it's a staff member at school or something: someone who knows I'm married but who wants to remain formal. It really doesn't bother me.
3. Usually when someone who doesn't know me (for example, someone in a customer service role) refers to me by my last name they use Ms. Last Name. That seems entirely appropriate. My marital status is irrelevant to whatever transaction we're conducting.
4. Since when did Ms. imply someone who is divorced? Isn't it just someone who prefers not to go by Mrs. or Miss? It's the equivalent of Mr. for a man.

Ms here, and definitely married.

Became "Ms" as a teenager after realising "Miss" was the equivalent of "Master" for males. Not ok over the age of about 6. Married now. Still "Ms". Never divorced🙃

There should really be just one title for all adult women (who aren’t drs etc)

I feel more Mrs now I’m divorced than when I was married but that’s because I’ve always used my original name I think.

I've been Ms since I was about 18. Now 40, married, and still Ms .

(Except on any accounts I've had since I was a child which are still Miss because I'm lazy 😬)

I accept Mrs (husbands name) in school life but at work I’m Ms (maiden name) and have been through pre marriage, marriage, divorce and married again!

I’ve been called by a client before to ask if I was miss or Mrs for their board minutes - it really annoyed me - and I didn’t think I was overly feminist until then!

Ms and I'm not divorced. It's no one's business what my marital status is which is why I use Ms.

"I’ve been called by a client before to ask if I was miss or Mrs for their board minutes - it really annoyed me - and I didn’t think I was overly feminist until then!"

That's outrageous! As someone who regularly writes board minutes I would always use Ms. without even thinking about it!

Ms here and never divorced. I used Ms on my ucas form as a teen too.

yanbu - titles are sexist and annoying. Mr tells people nothing whereas for women it's a 'choice'

I think I’m just going to say ‘madame’ from now on!

DMIL, DD and I range in age from 3 to 75 and are all Ms. No divorcees.

When I started changing stuff over to Ms in my twenties (c.10 years ago) a 40yo colleague said she kept Miss as to her Ms meant you’d been divorced. I thought that was a really dated view back then!